Neelam is an Aerospace Engineer, who has studied and worked on three continents, and currently lives in Munich, Germany. She is an ardent seeker of Truth, enjoys meditation, and has been a Heartfulness trainer for three years. She believes in making a difference to humanity.

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Neelam Shivhare

<h4 style="text-align:justify;">NEELAM SHIVHARE explores some of the great ancient texts of India on motherhood, compares the behavior of Kaikayi and Yashoda, and realizes the importance of removing fear from our hearts in order to nurture our children.</h4>&nbsp;The Ramayana is one of the finest epics of Indian mythology, with lessons of all kinds. It would be unfair to say one lifetime is enough to understand the essence of each character, the plot, and the overall message, but&nbsp;to explain the context, I will write a few sentences.The Ramayana was set in an ancient kingdom, at a time when King Dasharatha was at the cusp of passing his duties of kingship on to his first born, Prince Rama. A peculiarity about this kingdom was that once a person had given their word, it was valued to be the highest, even beyond human life.The kingship of Prince Rama was no surprise to anyone, being the tradition, however it was not accepted by the king’s third wife, Kaikayi, who had been convinced by her maid Manthara that her own son, Bharat, should be king. Her wishes didn’t yield results until one fateful day she happened to help King Dasharatha during a battle, whereafter he granted her a wish. She kept it as leverage for later, and meanwhile crystallized the dream for her son.Just when the time for Prince Rama came to take over the throne, Kaikayi asked the king to grant her wish, as he had promised. She demanded that her son Bharat be the successor instead of Rama, and that Rama and his new wife Sita be sent into exile in the forest far away for fourteen years.Upon learning&nbsp;what Kaikayi did, what emotions arise in you? You may wonder what made her like this? Was it her maid Manthara’s words? My current understanding says it was neither those words nor her decisions. It was fear in her heart that prevented her from seeing the truth.One wonders how a mother can divide two brothers. Well, it appears that sensitivity is a luxury, cherished by few. Nature might give it to mothers, but doesn’t hesitate to take it back should they not exercise it in the journey of life.Kaikayi&nbsp;was blinded by love for her son, aware that he was not the first born for kingship, attached to a future that tempted her. And the cherry on the top was the company she kept. Was she acting from the heart? Doubtful. Was she entirely wrong in her mind, not at all.Then the fault arises in her choice of being driven by fear. Fear engulfs behavior. It enslaves and conditions us, and doesn’t allow even sane people to act correctly.Compare this with&nbsp;Yashoda, the adoptive mother of Lord Krishna, from the era of the Kali Yuga and the great epic of the Mahabharata. Both Kaikayi and Yashoda were mothers, both deeply attached to their sons. What makes them so different?Yashoda received Krishna as a baby and accepted him as her own. Her heart was so free she didn’t activate her mind at all. The way Krishna made his way to her heart wasn’t a coincidence. What made Yashoda behave that way?&nbsp;She was devoid of fear.<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">We are creative beings, never forgetting the gifts with which we have been bestowed—the love and tenderness, natural instincts, and intuition to feel the right path. It all lies in the mysterious meanderings of the heart.</h4><hr>What remains when there is no fear? Isn’t it a heart akin to God, so loving that it doesn’t know the difference between my child and someone else’s child?Applying these lessons, I have learned how different destinies can be shaped.&nbsp;What does it &nbsp;take?&nbsp;Awareness.&nbsp;Consciousness of behaviors, vices, and virtues.&nbsp;For young women like myself, who are future mothers, I trust we are on the path of becoming self-aware and brutally honest with ourselves. We are creative beings, never forgetting the gifts with which we have been bestowed—the love and tenderness, natural instincts, and intuition to feel the right path. It all lies in the mysterious meanderings of the heart. Are we really listening to our hearts, or confusing the bombarding information on social media with reality?Practically, what can we do to prepare ourselves?Self-work: First, be honest with yourself. Alone, with the heart, not just meditating for the sake of ticking the box, ask yourself, “Do I like my current self? What is preventing me from being whole in this moment? Am I evolving on a daily basis?” &nbsp;Work on it. Meditate ardently, and every week make a reflection: “How was I behaving last week versus how am I feeling now?”Clarity: It isn’t about how well one can raise a life, but rather, “Am I equipped mentally, emotionally, and physically to even start doing so?” The decision is entirely with the woman. I do not hesitate to say that. Remember, we are creative beings, so there is always a way. And this is the most beautiful job, akin to the Creator’s, which is usually not looked upon with reverence.Action: Before the game begins and you invite a new life into the world, what if you map out what kind of mom you want to be?&nbsp;Cool mom, nurturing mom, or something else? Yes, it is possible to carve out a plan, why not? This is your laboratory and you can choose the ingredients in you that you would love to have.Lalaji’s “Principles of Conversation” help multifold, with their simple recipe to speak with love, like a current of the Divine that enters the heart directly. Imagine being spoken to with so much love, so much ease?Working on that plan also helps prepare ourselves in a way that we overcome our&nbsp;genetic traumas, and also release our regrets, unfulfilled needs, and heal&nbsp;to an extent that our future little angels are served in the best way possible. Like Yashoda Maa’s infinite love. After all, kids are life’s longing to express, and we are privileged to host their bodies for the sake of tomorrow.Turns out,&nbsp;Kaikayi and Yashoda were not just characters in stories, but Viveka personified, if only we are looking!<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">For young women like myself, who are future mothers, I trust we are on the path of becoming self-aware and brutally honest with ourselves.&nbsp;</h4><hr>&nbsp;<figure class="image image_resized" style="width:75%;"><img src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/fear_affect_role_mother2_0a6addd531.webp" alt="fear-affect-role-mother2.webp" srcset="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/thumbnail_fear_affect_role_mother2_0a6addd531.webp 145w,https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/large_fear_affect_role_mother2_0a6addd531.webp 1000w,https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/fear_affect_role_mother2_0a6addd531.webp 1000w," sizes="100vw"></figure>

How does fear affect our roles as mothers?

Neeraj is an artist who works with paintings, drawings, installations, photography and site-specific installations. Neeraj has done two solo exhibitions, has shown widely in different projects and group exhibitions, and has attended Space Studio Residency Program, Vadodara, and Utsha Foundations for Contemporary Art.

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Neeraj Patel

Neeraja has been a board-certified pediatrician and specialist in pediatric emergency medicine for the past 25 years. She currently resides in New Jersey, USA, with her three children and manages a general pediatric practice. She enjoys reading, tennis, and travel in her spare time.

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Neeraja Kairam

<h4 style="text-align:justify;">NEERAJA KAIRAM is a physician based in New Jersey, USA. She shares with us her gratitude for the community she has found as she navigates the complex emotions surrounding grief, and builds bridges of understanding.&nbsp;</h4>&nbsp;November 29, 2020 is a date etched in my brain as the day my life changed forever.&nbsp;My husband, who had been by my side for 27 years, died suddenly and unexpectedly at the age of 50.&nbsp;I think of that time as an inflection point in my life, before his death (B.D.) and after (A.D.).&nbsp;In the three years since, I have become a different person.&nbsp;Looking back on the early days and months, I see a mix of pain and sorrow, gratitude, and resilience.&nbsp;I am still on the journey of navigating this new life that neither my kids nor I asked for. Along the way, I have discovered how the support of community and the connections I have formed allowed me to flourish even in the most difficult of times.&nbsp;In the aftermath of his death, there were so many mixed and complicated emotions, all shrouded in a cloud of intense grief.&nbsp;The sadness, isolation, fear, and sense of helplessness overwhelmed me in those early days. Outwardly, I appeared fine to many, as I mustered the strength to put one foot in front of the other, driven by the sole purpose of providing stability for my children.Balancing this newfound solo life with a full-time career was far from easy, especially when I inherited the task of managing my late husband’s business.&nbsp;His employees were also grappling with losing their beloved boss and their own anxieties about their livelihoods, so they looked to me for leadership. And, the constant concern for my three teenagers—now relying on me as their sole parent—weighed incessantly.&nbsp;<figure class="image image_resized" style="width:70.37%;"><img src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/transforming_grief2_2f1cd2fd02.webp" alt="transforming-grief2.webp" srcset="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/thumbnail_transforming_grief2_2f1cd2fd02.webp 145w,https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/large_transforming_grief2_2f1cd2fd02.webp 800w,https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/transforming_grief2_2f1cd2fd02.webp 800w," sizes="100vw"></figure>Grief is a complex and often misunderstood emotion. We all encounter it at some point in our lives, yet it remains challenging to accept and share openly. The discomfort it brings to those around us can result in a heavy burden, as we often feel compelled to hold our emotions in.&nbsp;Even the well-intentioned question of “How are you doing?" can leave a griever in a difficult position, unsure how to respond.&nbsp;For would-be consolers, there are also many complex emotions. In addition to sympathy and empathy, a sense of helplessness often stems from not knowing how to alleviate the griever’s grief.&nbsp;There is anxiety about saying the wrong thing, frustration due to the inability to find the right words, awkwardness in not knowing how to act or what to say, and even a tendency to avoid the situation to circumvent these uncomfortable emotions. I have felt all these things myself.<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">It is about recognizing the shared human experience and acknowledging the importance of supporting one another through life’s most challenging moments.</h4><hr>In our society, it is uncomfortable to discuss grief, and often not openly accepted. So, is there a way to bridge the gap and foster greater acceptance and understanding? It requires us to break down the walls of separation and push open dialogues about grief to the mainstream. In the end,&nbsp;that journey requires a collective effort to dismantle traditional barriers.&nbsp;It is about re-cognizing the shared human experience and acknowledging the importance of supporting one another through life’s most challenging moments.&nbsp;I was fortunate to have key people in my life who provided crucial support.&nbsp;They offered solace and guidance, and insisted I take moments of self-care. Despite their unwavering presence, I still grappled with an overwhelming sense of aloneness, a feeling that no one could truly understand the depth of my loss unless they had walked a similar path themselves. It wasn’t just the loss of my husband, my best friend, and the anchor of support for my children. It was also the loss of the future we had envisioned together.&nbsp;I lost my partner in travel, music concerts, and other adventures.&nbsp;I dealt with the loss of my identity in the world without him, and the loss of a clear sense of purpose in my life.&nbsp;Not long after my husband’s passing, a former colleague and friend, who had recently lost her husband to cancer, introduced me to an online support group for physician widows.&nbsp;Initially, the word “widow” bore the weight of sorrow, but with time, it came to represent strength and resilience. These women gave me a deep sense of belonging and understanding.&nbsp;They empathized with the myriad of emotions that come with widowhood—grief, guilt, fear, “should haves,” and all the expected and unexpected triggers.&nbsp;This supportive community brought me a sense of normalcy regarding my own emotions, and allowed me to extend support to others enduring similar grief.&nbsp;Recently, when one of them shared, “I have lots of people to do things with, but I have no one to do nothing with,” it was a moment of revelation. I connected with the sentiment, even though I struggled for so long to find the right words to express it. In this community of remarkable women I found solace and mutual support.&nbsp;Support also came from unexpected sources.&nbsp;I am still in awe of an experience that took place a year after my husband’s passing as we were approaching the holiday season.&nbsp;Every day for the 12 days of Christmas, a gift arrived on our front porch, accompanied by a card signed, “Your true friends.”&nbsp;On the 13th day, we received the final gift that explained the meaning behind these mysterious presents, a book called The 13th Gift by Joanne Huist Smith. In her book, she shares her own story of what happened after her husband passed away just before Christmas. Like us, her family received 12 daily gifts from strangers that helped them cope with their grief during the holiday season.&nbsp;To this day, the sender of those gifts remains a mystery, but the impact of this unexpected gesture of kindness and compassion has been permanently cemented in our hearts.&nbsp;<figure class="image image_resized" style="width:70.47%;"><img src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/transforming_grief3_a43a8ade80.webp" alt="transforming-grief3.webp" srcset="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/thumbnail_transforming_grief3_a43a8ade80.webp 145w,https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/large_transforming_grief3_a43a8ade80.webp 800w,https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/transforming_grief3_a43a8ade80.webp 800w," sizes="100vw"></figure>&nbsp;Looking back on the past three years, I am reminded of the people who stood by me when I wasn’t at my best, who listened when I needed to be heard, and who gave me space when I needed it.&nbsp;They encouraged me to take each day one breath at a time. &nbsp;It remains a powerful testament to the support and kindness of loved ones and strangers alike and exemplifies what it means to truly take care of each other.<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">They encouraged me to take each day one breath at a time.</h4><hr><hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">Illustrations by JASMEE MUDGAL</h4><hr>

Transforming grief 

Negin is a consciousness researcher, educator, and activist. As a social entrepreneur and founder of Be 8nfinite Inc., she is dedicated to unlocking human potential and promoting holistic well-being. With a background in psychology and consciousness studies, certifications in transformational and cognitive coaching for both youth and adults, and extensive experience as a certified trainer in the Heartfulness method of Raja Yoga, she brings deep expertise in self-exploration and personal growth. Negin supports people to connect with their deepest feelings, meanings, and longings, empowering them to reach their highest potential. She finds joy in guiding individuals and organizations to imagine, create, and embody the best version of themselves, fostering lives and workplaces filled with harmony, coherence, and joy.

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Negin M. Khorasani

<h4>NEGIN KHORASANI&nbsp;throws light on the beauty of the inner Self – its nature and its role in discernment.</h4>Many of us who are in the process of self-refinement are striving to become more and more gentle and loving; to respond in a state of love rather than fear-based reactions. Sometimes we are unsuccessful.. Later, when we review the events and don’t feel so good about them, we justify ourselves by saying that being severe is another godly quality that is needed, just as Shiva had both qualities. So is it just a matter of recognizing the right time for the right response? This complicates things – it brings the mind into the picture to decide on the right response, and the mind never seems to make it simple for us.<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">Our task, as Rumi says, is to remove all our inner barriers against love; barriers that separate us from the Ultimate. &nbsp;</h4><hr>Another approach is through the heart, where we develop Godly qualities. Our thinking faculty becomes a field to receive intuition, our intellect evolves into wisdom, and our ego becomes as subtle as possible, so that we are free from self-centeredness, and self-consciousness, and expand into the consciousness of Divinity. We see nothing but the presence of God, inside and outside.<img src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/ultimate_gentleness2_b9fd2f87d7.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-04T07:09:13.994Z" alt="ultimate-gentleness2">In this state, we are no longer driven by plans to be either gentle or forceful. We are in a state of utmost surrender and acceptance. If applying force is needed from our side, it happens in a natural and intuitive way, without us thinking or planning for it. It is not driven by our ego but by our higher Self in constant communion with the Divine. Love rules it, not defensiveness to protect our ego. Love sees no barrier and separation; love sees all as part of the Divine and does what is needed.When we see all that comes our way as coming from the Divine, as pure wisdom and as the ultimate good for all, we develop faith and later reach a state of surrender to the Divine. So we go with the flow without the least resistance. In this state, our desires and egotistical motives have vanished. There are no more personal likes and dislikes, no more resistance, and that to me is the ultimate gentleness. I always think of water as a lesson in how the gentle conquers the hard. When water reaches a big rock, it does not fight with it but just finds its way around it, and ultimately rolls the big rock from its place without spending any extra energy to do so. Strength is embedded in gentleness. There is no need to strive for it.I have been always amazed by how ancient traditions consider our inner Self to be the feminine side of us. According to ancient collective wisdom, we all have a feminine side, our subtler, finer Self; our inner self that represents true strength. There is a tarot card, Strength, which has a picture of an angelic female who has tamed a lion. This card represents our inner Self, which is able to tame our animal nature in its primal form. In fact, the will and passion of our instinctive nature need not be broken but refined and brought to consciousness, so that all levels of creation come into harmony. The persuasive ‘forceless force’ of the feminine can nurture and induce cooperation from everyone and everything, stilling disruptive energies by harmonizing differences in the spirit of collective goodwill. That is what the balance between Yin and Yang, Anima and Animus means.<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">So we go with the flow without the least resistance. In this state, our desires and egotistical motives have vanished.&nbsp; There are no more personal likes and dislikes,&nbsp; no more resistance, and that&nbsp;to me is the ultimate gentleness.</h4><hr>Our task is not in trying to think when to be loving and gentle and when to be severe and tough. Our task, as Rumi says, is to remove all our inner barriers against love; barriers that separate us from the Ultimate. To sublimate our ego and purify our consciousness more and more. To immerse ourselves in Godly remembrance so much so that the right thoughts, words and actions emerge in any situation in a natural and effortless way. There is no need to plan to be severe or to protect. When we dissolve the ego and remain connected to the Divine, are we not just a drop in this vast ocean? Are we not one with all? Are we not feeling already protected and safe? The task is just to dissolve ourselves – fana, as they call it in the Sufi tradition.<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">Article by NEGIN M. KHORASANI</h4><hr>

Ultimate gentleness is the ultimate strength

<h4 style="text-align:justify;">NEGIN M. KHORASANI searches for the quiddity&nbsp;of&nbsp;happiness.</h4>&nbsp;<hr>&nbsp;What would you wish for if you had a genie? A villa in the Canary Islands? A Lamborghini? A luxury vacation? Or something more sustainable: a bank account that never ends, which would maintain a high standard of living with all these things and many more? Or perhaps you wish for beauty? Or for the man or woman of your dreams, your perfect mate, with whom you can live happily ever after?Let’s pause right here, on the very last phrase, “happily ever after”, the words that all our fairy tale stories end with. Isn’t it the core and the essence of all our endeavors? Isn’t this everlasting happiness the reason we need our jobs, titles and money? After all, happiness is what we pursue through all these things. We believe they will make us happy, be it our hard work, our career, our leisure activities, our relationships, and our material possessions and money. So why not focus on our goal in the first place, instead of the tools that might help us to achieve it? Why not focus on happiness?So let’s look at the quiddity of happiness. How exactly can you define it without getting into the trap of equating it with the ways and means to getting it? So to be very clear, happiness is not the money, the luxury lifestyle, the most exotic and desirable food you may think of, a perfect relationship, or being in a happily balanced family life with your children around you, etc. These are all ways we think will help us reach a state of happiness.In order to define happiness, let’s recall the inner state and condition we have when we achieve any of the items on our list. How did you feel in that moment when you reunited with a loved one after being apart for a while? How did you feel when you were holding your baby for the first time? Or how do you feel in simple moments of satisfaction, for example after a good meal in a nice environment? It seems that in all these moments we experience a feeling of our needs or desires being fulfilled, whatever they might be, so we are able to go beyond and immerse ourselves in a state of balance, serenity and harmony.We are where we have to be, in the blissful present moment. We do not want to go anywhere else, as we are happy being exactly where we are. We feel a sense of belonging to something bigger than ourselves, connected, surrounded by it, and fulfilled. It is a feeling of being safe and supported, complete, whole and at home.This feeling of connection in the moment, of feeling safe and at home, seems to be the key factor associated with happiness. So to further our search for happiness maybe it would be wise to search for its essence; this feeling of connectedness, unity and inner contentment. This brings us to the heart; not the physical pump that we have in our chest, but the field where we receive our emotions. It is the core of our being where we can settle in and enjoy the feeling of connectedness to the whole of creation and feel at home. So it seems the journey of a thousand miles has brought us to the closest possible corner of the world, right here, available anytime; our heart. Isn’t it amazing how available is that we have searched for throughout human history?Now the question is: how to access this seemingly familiar and close corner, which tends to recede and stay far from reach? Both logic and experience says the means to simple things must be simple.<hr>So when we go within, tune into it, feel the connection and behold it, day after day, we start a process of becoming one with it.<hr>Meditation is a simple way to access the simplicity of the heart; to feel the inner presence, the joy we all are in our essence, the light that we are. This is our natural state. So when we go within, tune into it, feel the connection and behold it, day after day, we start a process of becoming one with it. This apparently very insignificant and passive activity of meditation that we do every day is the most potent way to explore this inner world. It also allows us to create our day and in perusing it persistently we can create our life in a balanced harmonious state that is full of happiness.Heartfulness is the process of finding the philosopher stone rather than the gold. For then we can turn every ordinary thing into gold, every ordinary moment into a joyful experience. That is the miraculous alchemy of Heartfulness, when you are in that lovely corner of the whole world, your heart.&nbsp;<hr>&nbsp;<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">Article&nbsp; by NEGIN M. KHORASANI</h4><hr>

Beholding and becoming

<h4 style="text-align:justify;">NEGIN KHORASANI shares her thoughts on loving in relationships, and the importance of letting go of expectations, attachments, and possessiveness; holding close without holding on.</h4>Have you ever noticed how even our most loving relationships can feel overwhelming? While they bring deep nourishment, we often find ourselves needing space and time to recover from their intensity. No matter how much we connect with those we cherish—our parents, siblings, close friends—it can sometimes feel as though their expectations never end. The more we give, the more is expected.I’ve come to understand that this is because, with every sweet connection, we fuel the fire of craving more. Instead of love flowing freely, it can turn into attachment—a bond that drains rather than uplifts.<h4 style="text-align:justify;">The hidden weight of attachment</h4>Attachment is like an invisible cord that ties us to others, keeping them in our mental space whether they are near or far. If a loved one is struggling, we carry their pain as our own. If they are sick, we feel their sickness in our hearts. Even if our own life is in balance, we cannot fully experience peace because their troubles weigh on us.We often hear mothers say, “I worry about my child because I love them.” But is this love, or is it attachment? True love does not burden—it liberates.&nbsp;<figure class="image image_resized" style="width:75%;"><img src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/holding_close_without_holding_on2_10509fa0de.webp" alt="holding-close-without-holding-on2.webp"></figure><h4 style="text-align:justify;">Love versus attachment: Understanding the difference</h4>Love is made of care and understanding. When we truly love someone, caring for them feels natural and effortless. If they need food, we offer it. If they need support, we give it, without counting the cost. Love asks for nothing in return. It is selfless, flowing like a river, nourishing without conditions.Understanding is another key component of love. A parent doesn’t take a child’s mistakes personally because they see the child is still growing. An elderly mother, in her wisdom, is happy when her children are busy building their lives, even if they cannot visit as often as she wishes. This is true love—giving, forgiving, and allowing.<h4 style="text-align:justify;">The trap of attachment</h4>Attachment, on the other hand, is conditional. We give, but we expect something in return. We help, but we want appreciation. We love, but we seek validation. This expectation inevitably leads to disappointment because it ties our happiness to someone else’s actions—something beyond our control.Even when we do great favors for others, if they come with unspoken expectations, they can feel like invisible shackles. Love is <a href="https://heartfulness.org/magazine/march-to-freedom-part-3" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">freedom</a>. Attachment is possession.<h4 style="text-align:justify;">The secret to boundless love</h4>When we love without attachment, we give wholeheartedly in the moment—whether it’s our time, care, or effort—and then we let go. We do what needs to be done, fully present and engaged, but once the moment has passed, we free our <a href="https://heartfulness.org/magazine/about-a-dog-and-a-small-boy" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">minds and hearts</a>. We don’t carry the emotional residue of our actions, nor do we dwell on whether our love was acknowledged or reciprocated.This openness allows us to remain attuned to the next person or situation that may need our care. When our mental space is clear, we can sense the world's needs and respond with love again and again. This is why one saint can carry the burden of an entire nation—because they don’t hold on. They give, they move on, and they remain available. Their love is infinite because it is not weighed down by attachment.<h4 style="text-align:justify;">Loving few versus loving all</h4>When we love with attachment, we can only love a few—our energy is limited because we are entangled in expectations, emotional burdens, and the need for reciprocation. But when we love without attachment, we become free to love all.&nbsp;<figure class="image image_resized" style="width:50%;"><img src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/holding_close_without_holding_on3_afea1c8f08.webp" alt="holding-close-without-holding-on3.webp"></figure>&nbsp;A person who practices loving detachment does not run out of love because they do not cling to any particular bond. Their love flows limitlessly, extending to family, friends, strangers, and even those who may never return their affection. They can care for many without exhaustion, simply because they are not trying to hold love, only to be love.To love fully and freely, we must practice loving detachment—caring deeply while allowing others the space to be themselves. It means supporting without controlling, giving without expecting, and holding close without holding on.When we detach with love, we free not only ourselves but also those we care for. And in that freedom, love flourishes—not just for a few, but for all.<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">When we detach with love, we free not only ourselves but also those we care for. And in that freedom, love flourishes—not just for a few, but for all.</h4><hr>&nbsp;

Holding close without holding on

<hr><h4>NEGIN KHORASANI explores some fundamental principles of Nature about giving and receiving, and how we can limit ourselves by a belief system of scarcity and replace it with a new belief system of abundance.</h4>&nbsp;<hr>&nbsp;When we don’t know how to give in order to receive, we are unaware of one of the most powerful laws of Nature. We may continue seeking and never be satisfied in our search. Many of us believe in scarcity and are in a state of poverty consciousness. We therefore stay in that state our whole lives. How can we receive what we don’t believe exists? The universe seems to always approve our belief, whatever it may be. If we believe in scarcity, that remains our reality; if we trust the universe and all its mysterious ways, we will observe in a state of wonder how things find their way to us from unknown sources. Even without knowing how, we can live in absolute abundance.Abundance starts with a state of mind. Only when we deeply believe in it, and allow the trust that is naturally generated as a result of this belief to prevail, will we no longer be afraid of giving. We know we are connected to the treasury of the universe. Even if it seems momentarily gone, it will come again, whatever it may be that we are giving – wealth, love, care, etc. Only with this inner condition and mental state does abundance appear as our physical reality.<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">Abundance starts with a state of mind.&nbsp; Only when we deeply believe in it,&nbsp; and allow the trust that is naturally&nbsp; generated as a result of this belief to prevail,&nbsp; will we no longer be afraid of giving.</h4><hr>It is one of the laws of Nature that there is never an empty space in Nature. As Goethe beautifully says, “It is the nature of grace always to fill spaces that have been empty.” The wise ones know there is no emptiness in Nature. Where an empty space appears, it is immediately filled with something else. The emptiness is just momentary. And as a something new appears in the place of the old, its fresh energy and newness fills our energy and flows to other areas of our life. So we never have to be afraid of losing anything. For example, take a relationship that has not worked, despite all the efforts we have put in to save it. Of course it is sad, but can we also ask, “What will come in its place? I am ready to embrace the new and fresh energy!”We make our choices, and in turn they shape our reality. ‘Poverty consciousness’ or ‘abundance consciousness’ – the choice is always ours. If we choose poverty consciousness, we remain in a state of worry and we stick to what we have, whether in our bank account, in the form of other possessions, or in other resources. Worry is an indication that we believe in the absence of what we are worried about. That in itself interferes blocks the manifestation of the desired object. If we choose abundance consciousness, we accept abundance as our reality and we believe in the presence of it.<hr><img src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/giving_receiving2_240e22d7a6.jpg" alt="giving is receiving"><hr>Therefore we enjoy a relaxed state of mind, as we are always spending from the treasury of the universe rather than a bank account. When we choose this state, we start giving constantly in the trust that it keeps coming. We become part of the flow of Nature. We become a conduit. Nature will know that it has found a proper conduit that allows everything to pass through.I am not talking of wasting resources but of being an open conduit for whatever should pass through, according to the wisdom of Nature. And when we are connected to that wisdom, we do not see separation between ourselves and Nature, which is the source of everything. Neither do we see separation between ourselves and other beings. We have one hand in Nature’s hand, and the other hand&nbsp;in anybody’s we come across. We receive from one hand and give from the other. In a state of oneness we naturally give warmth to the cold, food to the hungry, wealth to the poor, love and care to the ones in need, companionship to the ones who feel lonely. It is like feeling an itch in one hand and the other hand automatically scratches it, or when you wrap your hands around your body when you feel cold and rub your arms to give warmth.If we think about it, nothing remains intact with the winds of change in our world. So why cling to things that result in worry, which will block abundance? Instead we can develop our preferred state of mind and feeling, and stay there in its safety.Remaining in a state means maintaining a certain vibration, and that vibration translates into matter of the same vibration. That is how we attract certain people, events and circumstances in our lives that are in accordance with our state of mind or vibratory level. Therefore the real work is done on our inner state, changing our limiting beliefs and thought patterns based on lack and scarcity. We can change them into what serves us as well as people around us better. This may seem easier said than done, but we can break it down and make it simple.Our beliefs are the thoughts that we have practiced for a long time. So try to think new thoughts and start practicing them long enough to turn them into beliefs. This is even easier when we are free from the grip of old thought patterns by means of a mental cleaning process.<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">When we feel supported by the universe,&nbsp; we feel relaxed about life.&nbsp; We trust life and believe in its support&nbsp; whenever and wherever it is needed.</h4><hr>When we feel supported by the universe, we feel relaxed about life. We trust life and believe in its support whenever and wherever it is needed. Then we can smile deeply, expand and dance freely in our being. We start to live in abundance, and to live all those beautiful feelings that abundance brings us, as that is the reason we seek it in the first place. That sense of freedom, choice, relaxation, ease and generosity is but the result of deeply believing in the abundance that surrounds us. And when we live it truly, the vibration that is sent to the universe will attract equivalent things, people and events.The universe has no choice other than yielding abundance to such a person, and that is why we see carefree and generous people receiving more and more. They have learned, through their life experiences or an inner knowing, that giving is truly receiving. And ultimately when we give something, we are always giving ourselves.&nbsp;&nbsp;

Giving is receiving

<h4 style="text-align:justify;">NEGIN KHORASANI shares a practical approach to the attitude of wholeness: How do we cultivate it in everyday life? How do we remember just how integrated we really are, starting with the way we greet the world when we wake each morning?&nbsp;</h4>&nbsp;As I gaze at the fire and immerse myself in its warmth, I recognize the fullness of life in this moment. I see how this moment is perfect in every sense and every way. I am one with life… with the entire existence. I feel my fullness through this sense of unity with all that is. I am the universe. Om So Hum!Sometimes, in the activities of our days, in the highly active doing mode we inhabit, we forget our connection to the whole. We forget the fullness, perfection, and expansiveness of our being. We forget the wholeness of who we already are. We forget the miracle of life itself.At some point, everyone saw something magical in us—when we were first born. Our very existence was considered a miracle, from conception to birth. The first time we opened our eyes was celebrated as if the sun had risen anew. Our first smile was an embodiment of pure joy for our parents and loved ones.So what happened? Did we forget the <a href="https://heartfulness.org/magazine/choosing-life-part-2" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">beauty of life</a> as it flows within and around us? Did we lose our sense of reverence for existence? Do we see each movement of our bodies as magical? Even on our worst days, we remain miracles on this earth—our bodies, our minds, and the life force that breathes and moves us are absolutely glorious.Do we feel the miracle of waking up every morning? Can we recognize its grandeur and lie in awe and appreciation before making any move? Can we allow this awareness to fill our hearts with boundless gratitude and simply savor it as we awaken? Is our natural response to sit, even for a moment, in silent appreciation for this miracle we call life?Perhaps this is what we can focus on upon awakening each day. And as our day unfolds, we can bring ourselves back—again and again—to our connection with the source, to our wholeness, constantly reminding ourselves of who we truly are, of the <a href="https://heartfulness.org/magazine/love-the-earth" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Divinity</a> within us. What if this were our practice throughout the day: to consciously dissolve the mind-made boundaries that separate us from everything and everyone?As we walk, talk, and engage in daily activities, we would consciously immerse ourselves in this remembrance of unity. Awakening to this wholeness is true healing. All suffering stems from the illusion of separation, which brings feelings of fear, worry, unworthiness, and inadequacy.With an attitude of oneness, we would realize we have already arrived at our destination. We are one with the source of everything. There is nothing—and no one—we must hold onto to feel complete. We are already whole. The absence of this wholeness is merely a construct of the mind, an illusion we can dissolve at will with awareness. We recognize our eternal and omnipresent nature. We see that time and space, too, are constructs of the mind, illusions shaping our perception of existence.&nbsp;<img src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/remembering_wholeness2_164b481d96.webp" alt="remembering-wholeness2.webp">&nbsp;As we bring more awareness to this truth, the stress of constant doing fades. This does not mean we stop taking action, but our approach to action changes. Our actions arise naturally in response to life rather than from a sense of lack. We no longer act to attain something, for in wholeness, there is nothing missing. Our actions become desireless, free from attachment to outcomes.Our days may be filled with activity, but we do not feel busy. We are not rushing from one task to the next. We give ourselves fully to each action as it arises, staying with it until we feel complete. Then, another task may call our attention. In each moment, we are fully present, fully engaged.And there are also moments when we could simply allow ourselves to be—to rest in the fullness of existence, to feel the beauty and miracle of life in connection with the whole.Remember that you are the universe. Breathe it in. Say to yourself: Om So Hum.<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">There are also moments when we could simply allow ourselves to be—to rest in the fullness of existence, to feel the beauty and miracle of life in connection with the whole.</h4><hr>

Remembering wholeness

NELLA AROSSA

His Excellency, Nelson Rolihlahla Mandela (1918&nbsp;– 2013) was a South African anti-apartheid activist, politician, and statesman who served as the first president of South Africa from 1994 to 1999. He was the country's first black head of state and the first elected in a representative democratic election. By the time of his death, in South Africa Mandela was widely considered both “the father of the nation” and "the founding father of democracy". Outside of South Africa, he was a global icon, with people describing him as one of the most revered figures of our time.Over the course of his life, Mandela was given over 250 awards, accolades, prizes, honorary degrees and citizenships in recognition of his political achievements. Among these awards were the Nobel Peace Prize, the US Presidential Medal of Freedom, and the Soviet Union's Lenin Peace Prize. In 1990, India awarded him the Bharat Ratna, and he was appointed to the Order of Isabella the Catholic and the Order of Canada, and was the first living person to be made an honorary Canadian citizen. Queen Elizabeth II appointed him as a Bailiff Grand Cross of the Order of St. John and granted him membership in the Order of Merit.&nbsp;

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Nelson Mandela

Make peace with your enemy

Nicole has 23 years of experience in education. Her drive comes from her commitment to providing the best quality education for all students at Novi High School and beyond. She was honored as the Michigan Secondary Principal of the Year in March 2022 by the Michigan Association of Secondary School Principals and the Michigan Association of Student Councils and Honor Societies.

Lina is a senior at Novi High School. She leads the Student Mental Health Committee and is an aspiring medical professional and programmer, interested in solving problems at the intersection of mental health, epigenetics, and computer science. She enjoys meditating daily and listening to Taylor Swift. She has conducted and published research to explore noninvasive ways to address mental health disorders in teenagers.

Priya is a junior at Novi High School. She is an aspiring scientist interested in mental health and building inclusive community platforms for free and creative expression. She loves playing the piano and singing in her free time. She is an avid member of the student council and volunteers her time to help others. She loves solving problems by developing apps and conducting research to explore the impact of technology in mental health.

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Nicole Carter, Lina Iyer, and Priya Iyer

<h4>NICOLE CARTER is Michigan’s “High School Principal of the Year, 2022.” Nicole and two of her students, LINA IYER and PRIYA IYER, share how they have been ensuring that Novi High School is a place where students feel they belong.</h4><hr><h4>“Keep your face to the sunshine, and you cannot see a shadow.” Helen Keller</h4><hr>NC: Fostering positivity and creating opportunity for self-care in schools can help the school community rise above challenges.&nbsp;As the principal of Novi High School, Michigan, I have the responsibility of setting a positive tone, and developing a school culture where students feel seen, heard, and valued. &nbsp;I use intentionality to inspire students, staff, and the community. We begin every day with “It’s another great day to be a Novi Wildcat.” This simple phrase reminds everyone how special it is to be a member of this incredible learning community.We strive to make our large, comprehensive high school feel small by incorporating an advisory circle practice every Tuesday. Developing a safe, secure learning environment lends to the social and emotional well-being of our students. We prioritize it at the same level as academics. Studies show that students who feel they belong achieve a higher level of success.&nbsp;Fostering positivity has significant and impactful benefits on the mind. It creates a sense of optimism and self-encouragement. MRI scans of the brain show evidence of increased neural pathways and brain usage where neural activity has increased as a benefit of practicing positive affirmations to foster happiness.The results from a research study conducted by the Palo Alto Research Center and the Computer Science Department of the University of California at Santa Cruz, on fostering positivity, concluded that individuals who were initially self-affirmative completed a larger percentage of their goals compared with those who had no initial self-affirmation.<hr><hr><h4>Fostering positivity has significant and&nbsp; impactful benefits on the mind.&nbsp; It creates a sense of optimism&nbsp; and self-encouragement.</h4><hr><hr><h4>How can we foster positivity in our lives?</h4>LI and PI: One way is through positive affirmations – statements and phrases that empower and support us. By practicing self-affirmation, we can look at our different aspects in a positive way. We also become better at adjusting to new situations.Positive affirmations can be used to motivate yourself, encourage positive changes in your life, and boost your self-esteem by describing how you want to be, or how you want your circumstances to be.&nbsp;For instance, heartful affirmations can be used to strengthen the positive traits of the heart. These affirmations help you become centered, relaxed, and open. When you connect internally, you are better able to connect externally to everyone and everything around you.&nbsp;Keep a Gratitude Journal to write about things or people that you are grateful for. You will focus more on the positive aspects of your life. There is no wrong way to do it! Writing for just 15 minutes a few times a week and being consistent about it will have a significant impact on your life.<hr><hr><h4>When you connect internally,&nbsp; you are better able to connect externally&nbsp; to everyone and everything around you.&nbsp;</h4><hr><h4>U matter</h4>At our school, we try to foster positivity and self-care through the Student Mental Health Committee, which began in 2016 with the support of our principal, Ms. Nicole Carter. It spreads awareness about mental health among our student community, and increases a sense of compassion among students, to reduce the social stigma surrounding mental illness, and to help the students maintain physical, mental, and emotional balance.One of the main events we hold every year is the “U Matter Week.” It is a week filled with activities so that the staff and students feel like they are the priority. Throughout the week, each day has a theme that represents an idea about mental wellness. This, in turn, serves to raise awareness.<hr><img src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/U_Matter2_700x466_b257f11fdb.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-13T10:36:51.984Z" alt=""><hr><h4>Mental health</h4>We conduct a multitude of activities, at lunchtime and after school, to help students relieve stress and maintain physical, emotional, and mental well-being. These activities include tying friendship bracelets, playing with puppies, and listening to motivational speakers.&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;This year, we ended our week with the “Crush the Stigma” event. Students wrote down their stressors, challenges, and things that were weighing on them on three cars. Eventually, they saw the cars crushed at the end of the week. The purpose of this event was to help students anonymously vent things that were bothering them.After the Oxford shooting last year(at a neighboring school), many students had difficulty managing the new level of anxiety. They felt uneasy coming to school. We wanted to do something, so we held a Self-care Week, which gave students the time and opportunity to try out different mental health activities. We also encouraged them to try out Heartfulness tools.&nbsp;Earlier this year, we conducted an Institutional Review Board approved study at our school to explore the impact of self-care programs on students and staff; to see the effects of these programs on anxiety, life satisfaction, and loneliness, using widely accepted scales. A total of 44 individuals participated.The study showed a significant decrease in levels of anxiety and loneliness, as well as increased life satisfaction scores in those trying the Heartfulness tools from weeks 0 to 4,and this was maintained through weeks 4 to 8. In the control group, there were no significant changes from weeks 0 to 4, but a significant decrease in the levels of anxiety and loneliness and increase in life satisfaction scores from weeks 4 to 8.&nbsp;<h4>Looking ahead</h4>We are looking forward to working with our school community, and inspiring other schools to enhance the learning experience of every student, while giving them a safe, positive, and caring environment in which to grow.<hr><hr>References:Cascio, C.N., M.B. O’Donnell, F.J. Tinney, M.D. Lieberman, S.E. Taylor, V.J. Strecher, E.B. Falk, 2016. Self-affirmation activates brain systems associated with self-related processing and reward and is reinforced by future orientation. Soc Cogn Affect Neurosci.Apr, 11(4):621-9. doi: 10.1093/scan/nsv136.&nbsp;<a href="https://www.google.com/url?q=https://www.google.com/url?q%3Dhttps://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4814782/%26amp;sa%3DD%26amp;source%3Deditors%26amp;ust%3D1668000920231478%26amp;usg%3DAOvVaw2wG7OZt2M_vsteHisBL_C8&amp;sa=D&amp;source=docs&amp;ust=1668000920239363&amp;usg=AOvVaw1nTJUKIrcQ3rT62hverMRG">https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4814782/</a>Springer, A.,&nbsp;A. Venkatakrishnan,&nbsp;S. Mohan,&nbsp;L. Nelson,&nbsp;M. Silva,&nbsp;P. Pirolli, 2018. Leveraging Self-Affirmation to Improve Behavior Change: A Mobile Health App Experiment. JMIR Mhealth Uhealth, 6(7):e157. doi:&nbsp;<a href="https://doi.org/10.2196/mhealth.9151">10.2196/mhealth.9151</a>&nbsp;

U matter

Nilakshi is the Director, Office of Public Affairs at the National Spiritual Assembly of the Baha’is of India. She promotes social change, including fostering a new culture of equality in India and the transformation of society structures that prevent women’s full and meaningful participation in public life.

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NILAKSHI RAJKHOWA

<h4 style="text-align:justify;">NILAKSHI RAJKHOWA is the Director, Office of Public Affairs, National Spiritual Assembly of the Baha’i Faith in India. During the Mahotsav, she challenged everyone to join together to overcome our current crises, by starting with the heart.</h4>&nbsp;Heartful greetings on behalf of the Baha’i Community to each and every one of you. I’m delighted and honored to be part of this Global Spirituality Mahotsav. Thank you for bringing us all together.I would like to begin with a quote from the Baha’i writings, “O SON OF SPIRIT, my first council is this: possess a pure, kindly, and radiant heart that thine may be a sovereignty ancient, imperishable, and everlasting.”&nbsp;It all starts with the heart, and what Heartfulness is trying to do is unlock the hearts of everyone so that we can embrace love, unity, compassion, and break our barriers of caste, religion, and gender. I’m so happy to be part of this, and want to share a few thoughts from the Baha’i community.&nbsp;Friends, we see many factors keeping India together as a nation. One vital cohesive force binding the nation is spirituality. It finds expression in valuing human beings as the creation of the Divine, and is open and accepting of people of all backgrounds who view the reflection of the sacred in all living beings. This enjoins respect, gentleness, and nonviolence in relationships as the ideal way of life. It is this spirit of all-embracing oneness that is conveyed in the ancient ethos of Vasudhaiva Kutumbakam—the world is one family.&nbsp;The unity of nations will be a stage in the progressive manifestation of oneness in the social and political realms. It will reach its fruition when the principle of oneness of humanity is established in the consciousness of people, and when nations across the world unite as one family.&nbsp;Over the past few decades, there has been a resurgence of religious fundamentalism that represents religious extremism and intolerance. It has increasingly entered the political and social mainstream, and in many countries it dominates public discourse. This has created confusion around the concept of religion, as its unifying and constructive role has been obscured by the tendency to view it solely through an identity lens. These challenges come at a time of great uncertainty, when the need for unity is vital to successfully navigate the waves of present and impending crises. These crises include the Covid pandemic, geopolitical instability, war, economic recession, climate change, terrorism, the food crisis, and the energy crisis.&nbsp;<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">History bears witness to the fact that only religion is capable of stirring the depths of human motivation and calling forth the spirit of nobility, sacrifice, and initiative needed to achieve such an objective.</h4><hr><figure class="image image_resized" style="width:75%;"><img src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/human_fellowship2_68674c19de.webp" alt="human-fellowship2.webp" srcset="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/thumbnail_human_fellowship2_68674c19de.webp 145w,https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/large_human_fellowship2_68674c19de.webp 502w,https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/human_fellowship2_68674c19de.webp 502w," sizes="100vw"></figure>&nbsp;The need of the hour is constructive dialogue, a discourse involving leaders and representatives of all religions on religion’s contribution to social harmony. The ground for such a discourse can be laid by clarifying the fundamental nature and purpose of religion, and the common foundations of all religions. Such a discourse must show a practical path forward for inter-religious collaboration. Preserving the tradition of inter-religious fellowship requires efforts from individuals, communities, religious leaders, and institutions. However, such efforts can close in on themselves if inter-religious unity is considered an end in itself, and is not viewed from the context of society’s needs.&nbsp;At this moment in history, unless united communities are driven by a common objective to contribute to the transformation of society, and to ever-increasing material and spiritual prosperity, unity can become a pretext for passive conformity with the status quo, with all its attendant challenges and injustices.&nbsp;The most secure basis of inter-religious harmony lies in coming together to apply spiritual principles to build a united, just, and prosperous world. The complex and unprecedented challenges of the 21st century will require us to make deep changes in our patterns of thought and behavior, and the willingness to make profound sacrifices for the common good. The kind of structural and systemic changes needed to become more united and restore our balance with nature will require selfless efforts on a scale and for a duration never before witnessed.<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">Youth can move the world. They have a critical role to play in the fields of development, peace, &nbsp;and the prosperity of humanity.&nbsp; Young people want a better society, no matter where they live. &nbsp;They tend to believe in unity and be relatively &nbsp;unburdened by biases and prejudices. They want &nbsp;peaceful and prosperous futures for themselves and their peers.</h4><hr>History bears witness to the fact that only religion is capable of stirring the depths of human motivation and calling forth the spirit of nobility, sacrifice, and initiative needed to achieve such an objective. The world is in dire need of religion to once again course through our veins, to stir a common and collective response to our challenges.&nbsp;Religious leaders have a role to direct the attention of their congregations to the needs of the world. Many heartening examples of this were witnessed during the worst phases of the Covid-19 pandemic. Twenty-five leaders of religions and interfaith movements in India issued a joint statement to reiterate those religious principles having the greatest bearing on people’s responses to the crisis. The statement, which was coordinated by the Baha’i community of India, called upon all religions to unite in a common commitment to spiritual principles relevant to the crisis. And that statement is just as relevant to the current challenges we all face: recognizing the oneness of religion, the oneness of humankind, selfless and sacrificial service to the common good, and complementarity between science and religion. Although it was a modest effort, it illustrates the tremendous potential for positive social change that resides in the untapped spirituality of the common people, which faith leaders can together inspire for the well-being of all.&nbsp;Another group with great capacity and potential is our youth. Youth can move the world. They have a critical role to play in the fields of development, peace, and the prosperity of humanity. Young people want a better society, no matter where they live. They tend to believe in unity and be relatively unburdened by biases and prejudices. They want peaceful and prosperous futures for themselves and their peers.&nbsp;It is time to let unity and harmony become the dominant narrative, and strongly associated with our identity, relegating conflict among religions to an earlier and less mature stage of our history. Let us harness the edifying power of religion toward constructive endeavors that can bring about spiritual and material prosperity. In this way, India can contribute to global peace and harmony, assuring its place as a leader in spirituality and inter-religious harmony.&nbsp;<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">It is time to let unity and harmony become the &nbsp;dominant narrative, and strongly associated with &nbsp;our identity, relegating conflict among religions &nbsp;to an earlier and less mature stage of our history. &nbsp;Let us harness the edifying power of religion &nbsp;toward constructive endeavors that can bring &nbsp;about spiritual and material prosperity.</h4><hr>&nbsp;<figure class="image image_resized" style="width:75%;"><img src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/human_fellowship3_a1c7741c40.webp" alt="human-fellowship3.webp" srcset="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/thumbnail_human_fellowship3_a1c7741c40.webp 145w,https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/large_human_fellowship3_a1c7741c40.webp 600w,https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/human_fellowship3_a1c7741c40.webp 600w," sizes="100vw"></figure>&nbsp;<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">Illustrations by JASMEE MUDGAL</h4><hr>

Human fellowship

Nimo is a child at heart. He loves animals, finds heaven in nature, expresses himself through the performing arts, loves food while enjoying a health-conscious lifestyle, and finds deep joy in seeing others in joy, good health and peace. His journey has led him on a path of service and love. A world-renowned musician, he’s a simple dude who likes to laugh and share his heart with all beings.

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Nimo Patel

<hr class="vertical-space1" />
<h4>
 With an Ivy league education, this MTV rap/hip hop star was living the
 American dream and working on Wall Street when the events of 9/11 unfolded
 in front of his eyes. Giving up the corporate world,
 NIMO PATEL decided to pursue his
 passion for music in LA, but a chronic health issue led him to seek
 Ayurvedic treatment in India. He stayed back for 6 months to volunteer at
 the Gandhi Ashram in Ahmedabad, and continues to this day working with the
 slum children of the city when he’s now working for his own non-profit
 organization, Empty Hands Music.
 VANESSA PATEL caught up with him in
 June to learn more about his mantra, “Service, Simplicity &amp;
 Songwriting.”
</h4>
<hr class="vertical-space1" />

 Q: Hello, Nimo, so happy to have this opportunity to chat with you. How
 are you doing during this lockdown?


 NP: Wonderful! Breathing, and deep
 breathing, doing good. You know, it’s a time of reflection and
 introspection, to reflect on the way we live, how we interact with each
 other, with humanity. It’s really a blessing. There’s so much suffering
 going on, so this is a gift of transformation. Obviously, we will get
 through this suffering, but hopefully, we can use it for the betterment of
 humanity. So, collectively and individually, this is a gift in many ways,
 although in the short term it’s tough to digest.
 


 How are you doing?


 Q: Doing well. As you said, using this time to reflect. And one of the
 things I realize is that we don’t need a lot of the stuff we’ve
 accumulated in our lives. You already started this process several years
 ago when you took up a life dedicated to service. So, when you did a
 U-turn from your previous lifestyle and did a ‘material’ cleanse, would
 you say this was a spiritual shift?


 NP: For me, the spiritual journey is
 such a gradual process, so even the word ‘U-turn’ feels a bit abrupt, as
 though I saw the sign right away and it fixed everything. Instead, I would
 say, my journey has been ongoing – from the seeds that were planted when I
 was young, from memories of going to the temple, to being exposed to such
 a diverse group of friends and community in elementary school, high
 school, then college. Just the diversity around me was a spiritual
 teacher, in a sense, to accept and embrace all faiths. Whether I’m in an
 honors class with people with a certain mindset, or on the sports team
 playing basketball with people of a different mindset, that for me laid
 the foundation. It’s hard to capture, and I feel so honored and blessed to
 have grown up in that diverse community outside Los Angeles, and later on
 going through college.
 

<hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <img
 class="w-100 lazyload"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/service2_068f4ad2dc.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-10T07:31:04.057Z"
 alt="service2"
 />

<hr class="vertical-space1" />

 I feel one of the major triggers for me happened when I was working on
 Wall Street and 9/11 happened before my eyes; seeing that happen and then
 embracing things, the ongoing process of healing and reflection. That was
 literally the biggest trigger. I was one and a half years out of college,
 and it hit hard: “What are you actually doing with your life?” You never
 know, you could have literally been gone today. You don’t know when this
 is going to end, when this magical journey you’re blessed with on planet
 Earth is going to end. So, that triggered me to say, “I don’t think I’m
 having a purpose at this company at a deeper level.” I needed to follow my
 passion and it pushed me to leave New York to pursue music, media and
 entertainment.
 


 And then, another thing triggered me along the way, which was my health
 journey. I got this chronic illness in my hand, called carpel tunnel
 syndrome or repetitive stress injury, which gradually got worse. I was
 doing a lot of computer work at that time in 2002, as my friends and I had
 just started an online comic strip that turned into a media company and
 animation studio. And through that, by 2005 the problem started
 increasing, and by 2006 it was unbearable. By 2007, it was so bad I
 couldn’t even brush my teeth or hold a bag.
 

<hr class="vertical-space1" />
<hr />
<h4 style="text-align: center">
 “What are you actually doing with your life?” 
 You never know, you could have literally been gone today. 
 You don’t know when this is going to end, 
 when this magical journey you’re blessed with 
 on planet Earth is going to end.
</h4>
<hr />
<hr class="vertical-space1" />

 It was then that my dad suggested getting Ayurvedic treatment, and my
 parents knew a healer in India. I had tried everything in the allopathic
 world and alternative medicines, and I had nothing to lose, because it
 wasn’t getting better.
 


 In 2004, because of this suffering, which was both physical and mental –
 we create it in our mind because of what’s going on – it led me to pursue
 meditation at a deeper level. My roommate in NY had once told me about
 Vipassana and it was the perfect time to try it. It became a big part of
 my life. Being in a deeper connection with my mind and body was one
 benefit. I stopped drinking alcohol; I thought if I really want to heal,
 then I need to purify my mind and body. I became more health conscious
 than before, took a deeper stand.


 When I came to India, another seed was planted. I arrived in Ahmedabad
 and stayed with my cousin and his wife (whose house I’m at now). I
 volunteered for 6 months at Manav Sadna, the NGO that I have been
 volunteering with for 10 years. The seed planted in my heart back then was
 working with children; we recorded a music album called Let Them Sing. It
 was an album of their voices, their stories. When I went back to the US
 the journey continued. There was funding to open an animation studio and I
 got into that. Again, a trigger came up, “What are you doing?”.
 


 You know, Vanessa, when I graduated from high school my dream was to
 become the CEO of Warner Bros. I always had a passion for media and
 entertainment. I chose Wharton Business School because I wanted to bridge
 business and entertainment; that was my vision. So, this animation studio
 was a dream for me. I’m not even mentioning the music stuff, which I loved
 – that was definitely my passion. But this career dream was as a
 businessman blended with entertainment, so, having the studio gave me that
 space and all the partners I was working with were amazing. It was in that
 space that I realized I wasn’t happy. I had worked so far in my life for
 this career goal, and I was finally in the space that resembled it, and
 still I was suffering in my heart. I was not feeling any sense of
 fulfillment or purpose. So either I could go with what the mind said,
 which was “You’re successful, you’re on a successful path”, or I could
 follow this soft, quaint voice which was not really able to reveal itself
 because the mind and the ego were more deceiving. But I’m so happy that,
 somehow, the suffering in whatever form it was, was calling out to say,
 “Please listen.” It was saying, “You need to start again.”
 


 I said to myself, “These last 10 years of your career have been amazing.
 You’ve been able to experience the world in such an amazing way.” I mean,
 we were touring as a music group, and the media and entertainment
 opportunities were really exciting, but there was something missing. And
 to listen to that voice was the key thing for me. I didn’t know what that
 meant, to be honest, and that was the scary part of it. The vulnerability
 that came with the change – from a mindset of set a goal and reach the
 goal to the mindset of surrender, but you don’t know where it’s going to
 lead you – was scary, but I felt that that was the only way I was going to
 realign myself at a stage in my life where I could still do it. I think we
 can do that at any stage, but I felt that at 30 I still had the capacity
 to follow my heart instead of going with what seems to be right in
 everybody’s mind or in the outside world, or from a material point of
 view.
 


 There’s a quote from Mahatma Gandhi that I always like to share, and it
 helped me at that time: “The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself
 in the service of others.”

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 <img
 class="w-100 lazyload"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/service3_6c384719d1.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-10T07:32:21.973Z"
 alt="service3"
 />

<hr class="vertical-space1" />

 
 I had felt lost in my own way, because my heart was not connecting with
 the external. So, basically, the next phase of the journey of my life
 became: What does it mean to serve? Not merely because I want to help
 others, but because I really need to understand myself. If service is the
 best medium to find myself, then what a win-win!


 After I moved to Ahmedabad, although I had external goals, for the next
 two years I was really focused on, “How am I purifying my own mind and
 heart in being a part of others’ journeys?” And that then became the
 formula.


 Q: You said that you didn’t want service to be ego-based, to have as
 little attachment to it as possible. So, you went out there with the idea
 to serve and actually felt yourself being served. That must have been a
 very humbling experience. Were there people in your life, your peers,
 perhaps, who questioned your new way of life?


 NP: Yes, there are all types of
 resistance when you’re going against the external grain, and also going
 against the internal wiring of your own conditioning. So, for sure, the
 journey with mom and dad, with friends and family, and with college mates
 especially, because they are all successful in different ways – for them
 to see me living this new life, a lot of questions kept coming up. But,
 the most important thing was to keep digging and trying to understand
 myself – why I was doing what I was doing. In the beginning phase it was
 an experiment! I remember thinking, “I can do this for a year, why not?
 And then start something else, or get a nice paying job, whatever it is,
 I’m fine, I have enough savings.”
 


 That’s how it started, and I said to myself, “I need to commit at least
 one year, and I need to go all in.” I remember one of my mentors, someone
 I’m close to here in Ahmedabad, said something that had such an effect on
 me: “Beta, you should live life like a flashlight. In the dark, you have a
 light and you see 6 feet in front of you. You don’t need to see more than
 that, actually, because with every step you take you’ll still have 6 feet
 of light in front of you. So, what’s the need to look back and stumble?”
 That really clicked with me, because it had always been, “What’s your 5,
 10, 15-year plan, your retirement plan?” So, this became an experiment to
 learn, to grow, and to rewire myself, because I realized that my wiring
 was not the way it should be. Why? Because I was suffering.


 I truly felt, and still feel, that we have the full capacity to minimize,
 if not eradicate, our suffering, but there are so many layers on us. So,
 it was really an opportunity to find out what’s creating the suffering
 and, in the process of service, how I was going to touch upon these
 layers, one at a time. We’re not going to clear everything in one go; it’s
 a lifelong journey.
 


 In that first year, my parents gave me the benefit of the doubt: “He was
 doing good, now he wants to do this, okay.” And in the second or third
 year, my dad specifically said, “You realize that if you want to live this
 type of life, you have to be passionate about it, and you’re going to have
 to simplify your life. Are you okay with not having so much and not doing
 all these things?” And after the third year, he was like, “Is this really
 what you want to do? Are you sure?” Then, little by little, they embraced
 the work I was doing, they were exposed to it, they started taking part in
 it. They started understanding, and being around me, with me. I think they
 started seeing the value in it, the purpose and joy in it, and the meaning
 in it.


 Q: And the fact that it was making you happy.


 NP: Absolutely! That was the impact
 on them. They were thinking not only of my own joy, but also what is it
 doing for the world, and they started seeing value in it. And when I
 reconnected with my music, in the third year after I moved to Ahmedabad, I
 started sharing that with the world as a gift. I didn’t want to charge for
 it. I wanted it to be pure, from a space of offering and not from me as an
 artist. A lot of people started questioning me then, too. And my dad and
 my uncle started wondering what I was doing.
 


 At one point, I was in Denver with my family and I remember asking my
 father, “Dad, when somebody is working for a company, he’s adding value to
 the company, and for that he’s getting compensated with a cheque every two
 weeks. So, that’s the materialistic business world we’re talking about.
 So, don’t you think that when, from my heart of hearts, I try my best to
 do my small part for the world, whatever that might be, God is going to
 support me, just as the boss supports his employee?” And I think it
 clicked for my dad at that point, and it was a nice turning point for him,
 as well, to realize that it’s much beyond the numbers game.

<hr class="vertical-space1" />
<hr />
<h4 style="text-align: center">
 We have the full capacity to minimize,&nbsp;if not eradicate, 
 our suffering, but there are so many layers on us. 
 So, it was really an opportunity to find out 
 what’s creating the suffering and, in the process of service, 
 how I was going to touch upon these layers, one at a time.
</h4>
<hr />
<hr class="vertical-space1" />

 It has been amazing, Vanessa, this journey of surrendering. As a human
 being and as a being full of ego, there are a lot of things that come up
 and it happens in phases. I’m much more grounded and connected to the
 Source during certain phases, and then I get karmically oriented, and I
 start doing projects and get caught up in the doing – even though it might
 be service, you’re still in this mindset of trying to account for
 something. Then I lose that stillness in me, which is the most important
 thing to me, the whole process. But I go back to “I’m not doing this to
 accomplish something, I’m doing this to purify my heart,” &nbsp;then it
 comes back.
 


 I’m on this journey with noble friends and family, who are walking this
 path together, not only to serve externally, but also purify internally.
 To me, that’s been the blessing on this path, and I couldn’t care less
 what I accomplish. If I die today, it would be feeling so humbled and
 blessed, crying tears of joy, and thanking God and all those people around
 for this journey that has unfolded.
 


 To be continued


 <a href="https://manavsadhna.org/">https://manavsadhna.org/</a> 
 <a href="https://www.emptyhandsmusic.org/"
 >https://www.emptyhandsmusic.org/</a
 > 
 <a href="https://gandhiashramsabarmati.org/"
 >https://gandhiashramsabarmati.org/</a
 >

<hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <img
 class="lazyload w-100"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/Simplicity_Colors_fe5a4b5f32.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-10T07:33:24.316Z"
 alt="Simplicity_Colors"
 />

<hr />
<h4 style="text-align: center">
 Interview by
 VANESSA PATEL 
 Photographs courtesy of NIMO PATEL
</h4>
<hr />

Service, simplicity, and songwriting - part 1

Service, simplicity, and songwriting - part 2

Founder of ServiceSpace, Karma Kitchen, DailyGood and KindSpring, he successfully works to integrate the Gift Ecology, technology and volunteerism. He is recognized globally for creating a culture that brings harmony and inclusiveness.

Nipun-Mehta.jpg

Nipun Mehta

Gift ecology

<h4>NIPUN MEHTA is one of the founders of ServiceSpace, Karma Kitchen, DailyGood, KindSpring and other organizations that successfully work within the Gift Ecology. From a young age, he was inspired by the need to serve others. Early role models like J. Krishnamurti, Gandhi, Swami Vivekananda and Goenka further fuelled that urge so that it has blossomed into a life of joyful, cheerful service. He was the recipient of the Dalai Lama’s Unsung Heroes of Compassion Award in 2014, and appointed to President Barack Obama’s Council on Poverty and Inequality in 2015. Here Nipun continues to explain the principles underlying the Gift Ecology to ELIZABETH DENLEY.</h4>Q: What happens in that dynamic of trust in relationships when people’s innate tendencies and fears surface? And of course they will, because we’re all human. We’re all carrying baggage from the past – culture, family, whatever – and these things arise. How do we deal with it?That’s why relationships are complicated. Anyone who has been in any relationship will tell you that it’s not so simple. It’s not like I give you five bucks, you give me the food and that’s the end of it. If I’m actually engaging with you in a multidimensional way, that’s going to evoke something – it may trigger me in certain ways. It may be much simpler and more convenient for me to not have that relationship and just engage in a transaction. So then why engage in relationships when it requires so much of me?Q: This is the critical question, Nipun, because this is at the root of so much that needs to change in our societies globally today. Not just in the West. It’s the same in India, and it’s the same in China. This is the million dollar question.Yes indeed.Q: How do we work with relationships? It’s not transactional in the sense that people are not doing something for money, and they’re not even doing something for recognition a lot of the time. The whole ethos of service, seva, is anonymity, humility, the Gandhi values etc. So how do we build this culture of trust without having transactions, without having carrots, if you like?<img src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/nipun_mehta2_a6290a9527.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-05T06:14:55.643Z" alt="nipun-mehta2">It takes many inner capacities that we need to cultivate. And if we do cultivate those inner capacities, the reward is that we get a high bandwidth engagement with life. So then we may ask: What actually happens when I’m in a relationship and certain parts of the relationship are difficult? And I have to now deal with those difficult parts to get to the high bandwidth engagement with life. I need to grow in equanimity, I need to grow in tolerance, and I need to grow in patience.It’s much easier in a consumeristic mindset, where we think, “Hey, I want this, I want it now, and I want to get to the next thing.” And if we keep doing it, that consumerism is going to get us to a very cheap engagement with life. So how do we build the virtues that lead to a higher engagement with life? And as we inch towards that high engagement of life, what we understand is that it’s never been between us and the other person in a one-to-one way ever. It’s just that we have reduced it to that.One of my friends was in San Quentin prison with people who had committed at least one murder. They were in a circle and they were sharing. At one point my friend got a board and asked, “Can you tell me how long you’ve been in jail?” He started writing it down and everyone shared: 20 years, 40 years, 12 years, and so on. He added it up and it was something like 484 years. Then he created another column and asked, “How long was your moment of rage?” 2 minutes, 7 minutes, 40 minutes, 1 minute, and he added it up and said, “In this circle, for a couple of hours of rage we have spent hundreds of years in jail.”That kind of a mirroring created a very powerful vibe in the room. During the follow-up circle of sharing, one of the guys said, “You know what I think? Hurt people hurt people. A person is never negative to you in a one-to-one sort of way. Just as we pay forward kindness, we also pay forward negativity. We also pay forward selfishness.” So he said, “I hurt somebody because someone hurt me.” The circle continued, and a little bit later another member of the circle said, “I’d like to add to that. Hurt people hurt people, but I think healed people heal people.”<hr><h5 style="text-align:center;">So when we look at relationships and the inconvenience of them, it is actually an invitation to grow in virtue, so that we’re able to go from that cheap bandwidth to a much deeper engagement in a much more multidimensional way. And if we do that, then in that field so much can grow, and in turn we can build trust in society.</h5><hr>So who do I have to be when I see somebody harming me? Who do I have to be to hold that whole lineage of conditions and have a big enough heart to say, “I will endure this and rebound it back with compassion.” The reward for that is not just that the other person might be healed in some way, but that you are graced with an incredibly high bandwidth engagement with the present moment.We saw people like Gandhi do exactly this. Godse put 3 bullets through him, and Gandhi’s response was, “Bless you, bless you, bless you.” He was not condoning the negative action, but rather he was saying, “I oppose the action, but you are much more than that action, and I love you.” That larger ‘you’.So when we look at relationships and the inconvenience of them, it is actually an invitation to grow in virtue, so that we’re able to go from that cheap bandwidth to a much deeper engagement in a much more multidimensional way.And if we do that, then in that field so much can grow, and in turn we can build trust in society.<img src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/nipun_mehta_381fdf86a8.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-05T06:15:55.703Z" alt="nipun-mehta">Q: So will this spread, do you think, to all the Afro-American kids who are in prison, all the Latino boys who are in prison? You know there is a lot of cultural divide, even in a wealthy country like the US. And I know there are people like the Greater Good Science team who are trying to address those social issues, because it isn’t an equal playing field either. So who is responsible for this?You and I! We can’t lose our agency through this process. Even with generosity – we tend to view generosity as a luxury sport. We say, “Look, if you accumulate like me and become very successful, then you can give.” But actually it’s not a luxury sport. Those who have the least end up giving the most.My wife and I were on a walking pilgrimage in 2005. We ate whatever food was offered and slept wherever place was offered, and those who had absolutely nothing would borrow food to feed us. We are wired to care, we are wired to give, we are wired to be related&nbsp;– and neuroscience now confirms all this. So we know that we want to do this, but we need spaces where we can explore it further. Of course it will take time. This isn’t a quick fix; it’s not going to happen overnight; .As you said, we have a lot of inequities. But fortunately, generosity, compassion, kindness are not reserved for those who have ‘made it’. There is no worthy destination until we arrive at acting with compassion in any moment&nbsp;– even if it’s silent, even if it’s a humble prayer. I have had homeless people on the streets start out by asking me for money, and by the end they offer me money. It’s not that I’m asking for money, but it’s just that they feel a kinship, they feel a brotherhood. And when you feel that brotherhood, you want to serve that brotherhood.So how do we tap into that kind of agency and trust the ripple effect? This is not going to happen overnight, because the problem was not created overnight. It took a long time. It’s just that we weren’t paying attention when it was drip by drip by drip. We were de-capacitating ourselves drip by drip by drip. And now, drip by drip by drip we have to turn it around.So if you ask, “What’s the quick fix solution?” I would say there isn’t any. And so you may ask, “Are you still committed to that? Are you committed to spread love, to do that small act of kindness, to plant that tree under whose shade you will never sit, whose blossoming you may never get to witness?” I’m willing to do that. It makes me come alive. I don’t need that immediate feedback loop. So if you and I are willing to step into the space, then I think that’s the start of the revolution.Q: Right. So what are the projects in your revolution at the moment? What’s happening and what’s going to happen? What’s your vision?So ServiceSpace is an incubator of many different projects. We have some that are online, like DailyGood and KarmaTube. These projects create online communities, spread inspiration. Some are offline, like Awakin Circles and Karma Kitchen. Some are in-between, like KindSpring, home of the Smile Cards, that create an online community, where people share stories, but the Smile Card act is actually in person, in offline space.So we have been creating this ecology of many different projects. But what binds all of them together is not the projects but the process. That process, for the entire ServiceSpace ecosystem includes an alignment with three basic building blocks:<ol><li>The first principle is that we’re volunteer run. When no one is paid, we are driven entirely by intrinsic motivations. Initially, that sounds cute, when you’re starting and you say, “We’re five volunteers.” But when you’re 500,000, the field of intelligence, that field of purely intrinsically motivated intelligence, is just profoundly different in its patterns of innovation.</li><li>The second principle is that we work with what we have. Not seeking or scheming. And the way it manifests concretely is that we never fundraise. We just say, “This is what we have,” so we work with what we have, which forces us to look at multiple forms of capit We’re no longer only thinking that money equals wealth; that is, we don’t think without money we can’t do anything. Quite the opposite. Money is one form of capital, but so is time, so is attention, so is technology, so are stories, cultures and so on. Our creative constraint invites us to engage with other forms of capital.</li><li>The third principle is that we focus on small, which means that we never say, “Go out and try to change the world.” We never design for that threshold of impact. And when you’re small, the onus is on you to be the change. You can’t say, “Oh, I’m trying to change this in this person.” You say, “Oh, am I being the change?” And if I’m being the change, am I growing in equanimity? Am I growing in tolerance? Am I growing in patience? Am I growing in compassion, generosity, and kindness? Am I manifesting that in every relationship? And am I then trusting the ripple effect of that, as opposed to trusting the ripple effect of the might of one’s organization?</li></ol><img src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/nipun_mehta4_f0946607fc.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-05T06:16:32.444Z" alt="nipun-mehta4">So these creative constraints are what encompass the whole ServiceSpace ecosystem. So we have many projects, doing so many things and touching millions of people on a regular basis, but underneath them, the way I parse it is that it’s actually about the process underneath, which are these core values.Now, looking at the field, what is emerging right now?One thing that has recently emerged is this idea of a Laddership Circle. We talk about leadership, which is command and control, whereas laddership is about being in the back of the room, tuning into the myriad relationships that make up that community. And you change an ecosystem not by power, not by control, not by force and coercion, but actually by nudges, predicated on your capacity to know the interrelationships between everybody.For example, look at the way acupuncture works. If I have a neck ache, the acupuncturist may place a little pin on my arm – because the knee is connected to so many other parts and it creates this ripple effect that heals my neck. Similarly, we do that in a social context. It works in the same way, and it’s far less violent than other options.Then, the question is – how can we &nbsp;create a whole context, especially for young people, to hold all this, not as a leader, not as somebody who is mighty and centralized, but as a decentralized ecology that you hold with this kind of a heart? And that’s not something that is taught, and we don’t explore it. So we’ve started these Laddership Circles, which have been remarkable. We just had a Nobel Peace Laureate who joined one of these circles. They are peer-learning circles, so one person doesn’t teach another person. There are small groups of 6 to 8 folks, with 2 or 3 anchors who are just holding space on the side. And you’d be amazed how much we can learn from each other if get out of that hierarchical mindset.<hr><h5 style="text-align:center;">How do you create a whole context, especially for young people, to hold all this, not as a leader, not as somebody who is mighty and centralized, but as a decentralized ecology that you hold with this kind of a heart?</h5><hr>Q: So it’s an enabling model.It’s a model for growth. It’s not a manufacturing model but a gardening model. It’s something that’s emergent.Another project, which isn’t released yet, but which I’m excited about, is actually creating an eBay-like space, where you can pay not just with financial capital but also with other forms of capital. So I knitted this beanie for the love of it, because I enjoy knitting. Now you may be able to pay and maybe I need to get some money out of it. But I may also be happy if you go out and do an act of kindness and share the story with me. Or if you donate money to another NGO and send me the receipt. Or if you meditate for an hour and send me a reflection. We all know we value these actions, but we have never connected people in that sort of a way. And why not?So I’m very excited about this idea. There was a monk who came out with a CD, and he came to us and we were talking about how he was going to distribute it. We said, “You know, instead of just putting a price tag and doing the regular kind of distribution, why don’t you give people the option to also do an act of kindness and send you the story?” And hundreds of people sent stories! Can you imagine being a producer of value, in that sense, and receiving payment in alternate forms of wealth? Sure, I am not denying the power of financial capital. We all need money to pay our rent and pay our bills and things like that. But at the same time we can’t just blindly be focused on it. We can’t discount the immensity of other forms of capital that satisfy us, that nourish us, and that actually are regenerative, that nourish the person who gives, that nourish the person who receives. So how do we create a platform to facilitate these kinds of connections in a many-to-many sort of a way? I am excited about that.Q: That’s a real gifting ecosystem.Yes. And isn’t it amazing that we have all these innovations and technologies and we don’t think about alternate capitals? It’s almost like back in the days when NBC, CBS, and other centralized TV stations were there doing the work, but none of them could come up with a YouTube, because they were so entrenched in that worldview.Similarly I think that this is the time when spiritual people really need to get active, and active people &nbsp;get spiritual. We’re in a time when that kind of intelligence needs to arise. The innovation that came from YouTube disintermediated the NBCs of the world, and we saw it happen across the board: CDs turned into iTunes, billboards turned into Google AdWords. But now how do we bring these spiritual qualities into greater circulation, leveraging modern technologies and their new possibilities? And I think that’s the potential of our times and the need of our times. If we don’t do that we are going to continue to strip down of what it means to be alive.Q: And if we do do it?If we do do it, then I think we’ll have a higher engagement with life and a lot of virtue will grow in the field of our relationships, of our deep relationships. And I’d rather see that kind of a world.Thank you.<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">Interviewed by ELIZABETH DENLEY</h4><hr>

Gift ecology - part 2

Many to many

Nirja Parikh

<h4
 id="h-nirja-parikh-is-a-pediatric-physical-therapist-an-ayurvedic-consultant-a-certified-yoga-instructor-and-a-bharatanatyam-dancer-she-shares-her-journey-of-how-scoliosis-impacted-her-dance-career-and-how-yoga-helped-her-body-heal-and-her-mind-persevere">
 NIRJA PARIKH is a pediatric physical
 therapist, an Ayurvedic consultant, a certified yoga instructor, and a Bharatanatyam dancer. She shares her
 journey of how scoliosis impacted her dance career, and how yoga helped her body heal and her mind
 persevere.</h4>



<hr class="vertical-space1">



Growing up in North Carolina, my talented mom taught me my first choreographed dance routines. I felt at ease when
 performing on stage and enjoyed dancing at various cultural events to Bollywood film songs.&nbsp;At 12, I started
 training in Bharatanatyam, a form of Indian classical dance, and by 16 I had transitioned to advanced training. I
 also joined ballet classes and eventually took a gap year in India after graduation, so that I could focus full-time
 on classical dance.



We all grow up having dreams and ambitions, but many of us never see them fulfilled. I did not want to look back and
 regret not having followed my instincts. As a child, I always enjoyed going to India, and dreamt of going back there
 to learn dance and explore my cultural roots. After college, I auditioned for a dance reality show called Dance
 India Dance. During the fifth round, one of the judges disqualified me when he observed my spine curvature.
 I’ll never forget his statement, “I do not think it is safe for you to continue, given the situation with your
 back.”&nbsp;



With that one statement my dreams fell apart. I came back to the US to get my back checked. I knew I had scoliosis
 (curvature of the spine), but I had never thought it would limit me physically. The judge was right: X-rays showed
 that the curvature of my spine had increased from 12 to 60 degrees, affecting my shoulder blades, rib alignment, and
 breathing. I was immediately taken into surgery, and with two rods, fourteen screws, and two weeks in hospital, my
 whole life changed.



After surgery, the orthopedic surgeon remarked, “Look at you! You’ll be able to do backflips now!” I would come to
 resent that statement, because I believed him. Spine mobility is critical for a dancer, and I later learned that I
 had limitations in extension, rotation, and side bending. I had to re-learn how to move my body in a new way, and
 that is how Yoga became a core part of my life.



I had learned Mala meditation, Sanskrit mantra recitation, and Pranayama breathing as a child. Revisiting
 these lesser-known parts of yoga helped me heal after surgery. Yoga saved my body, which at the time had limited
 motion. Yoga helped me appreciate my new movement patterns and allowed me to let go of my ahankar (ego). By
 not comparing my new body to my old one, I began to appreciate the present moment.&nbsp;&nbsp;



Nonetheless, it was a tough journey. It required turning away from media stimulation and focusing entirely on myself.
 With dedicated practice, I eventually felt like my atman (soul) was reborn into a new body, despite being
 only 22 at the time.&nbsp;What helped me most was the practice of Pratyahara, which involves meditating in
 isolation for a couple of hours. Pratyahara is considered the fifth of the eight limbs of yoga, and it
 allows us to calm the wandering mind and senses. Pratyahara helped me find calm, take control of my
 emotions, and improve my psychological immunity.



The more I learned about yoga, the more I realized that elements of it had been instilled in me since adolescence,
 without the label. For example, I regularly attended Swadhyaya every Sunday, in which we studied the
 eighteen chapters of the Bhagavad Gita, recited Sanskrit slokas, prayed, fasted, and maintained a
 sattvik diet.&nbsp;This facilitated my journey to becoming a yoga instructor, because I was already so
 connected to the spiritual roots of yoga.



But I was intimidated by the other instructors when I first started teaching yoga at the local gym. The other
 instructors could handle the physically-taxing poses. To fit in, I molded myself into the Yoga costume, purchasing
 expensive leggings and accessories from popular athleisure brands. Despite my attempt to fit in and demonstrate my
 qualifications, I still felt unsettled, and at times humiliated and belittled. For example, I would hear the other
 instructors make comments like, “I’d love to go to India to practice yoga, but it’s so dirty.”



After finishing a Yoga Teacher (YTT-200) certification in 2016, I started applying for jobs. I was repeatedly not
 selected, despite having a multi-dimensional understanding of yoga.&nbsp;I realized it was because most studios
 cared only about my appearance and ability to handle physically-taxing poses, a symptom of how the West has
 glamorized the physical positions of yoga and the multi-billion dollar “athleisure” industry behind it. In
 subsequent years, I learned how culturally appropriated Yoga was in modern-day society. This fueled my passion to
 educate people on the true roots of yoga.



I am optimistic that change is coming in the yoga industry. I have been inspired by a small group of masters who are
 finally speaking out about this, and are being heard. As I hone my practice, I have started incorporating elements
 of the yogic culture, including Sanskrit chants. I recently began studying the Vedas, the Bhagavad Gita, and the
 Yoga Sutras in depth. Rather than treating yoga just as a profession, I consider it a lifestyle. I try to instill
 yoga into every part of my life – physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.



Yoga is a gift. It is a journey and a way of life that enables people of all races, religions, and body types to
 reach their potential, physically and spiritually.



I thank yoga for connecting me with my cultural roots, for making me stronger physically, and for giving me an avenue
 to cope with stress.&nbsp;



<hr class="vertical-space1">

Yoga helped me heal

Niroop owns and runs the restaurant 615chutney in Nashville, Tennesee. 615chutney started off as the only Indian food truck serving vegetarian, vegan and gluten-free South Indian food. His goal has always been to bring South Indian cuisine to the US.&nbsp;

niroop-prabhakar.webp

Niroop Prabhakar

<h4 style="text-align:justify;">NIROOP PRABHAKAR owns and runs the restaurant 615chutney in Nashville, Tennessee. 615chutney started as the only Indian food truck serving vegetarian, vegan, and gluten-free South Indian food. Niroop’s goal was to bring South Indian cuisine to the US. He believes that customer service is the key. The voices of his customers and employees matter to him. Here he is interviewed by the Heartfulness Wellness Team.</h4>&nbsp;Q: Can you please share your journey from India to the US and how you started 615chutney?NP: My dad used to say, you can live without anything else but you cannot live without food. That inspired me to get into this noble art of serving food and making good food accessible to everybody. The journey of my food business started with meeting family, eating food like a feast, and sharing love and affection with all mycousins, uncles and aunts.At the end of the day, I wanted to make sure that food was being served with love and the hope that tomorrow is going to be a better day. I was born and raised in Tamil Nadu, then moved to the US in 2008, and ended up in Tennessee. Both states have the initials TN. Well, 615chutney was born.&nbsp;The main goal is to give authentic South Indian food to the southern part of the country, and give it in a special way with good customer service. I empathize with my customers and make sure that my employees are happy when they’re serving the food.Q:&nbsp;The way you connect with your customers through your service is fascinating. What is the reason for reducing the number of seats in your restaurant?NP: Initially, the business started as a food truck and I was serving vegetarian, vegan and gluten-free food which is nothing but the basics of South Indian cuisine—idli, dosa, vada, and pongal.With gluten-free being the future of food, I was able to align my products with whatever the customers wanted. In 2019, we started a brick-and-mortar setup. In a couple of years, the area was hit by a tornado, then Covid-19.Covid helped us think out of the box. I moved to a different location and reduced the number of seats, making sure I accommodated as many guests as possible but at the same time allowing time to talk to everybody individually.Business is all about relationships, and when it comes to the food business, hospitality is key. In Tamil we say “Virunthombal”and hospitality is in our DNA in the south of India. In the south of the United States, I feel at home just by giving southern hospitality. Of late, hospitality has become zero in the Hospitality industry. We have to revive that.&nbsp;<figure class="image image_resized" style="width:75%;"><img src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/serving_smiles2_9b45bef70f.webp" alt="serving-smiles2.webp" srcset="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/thumbnail_serving_smiles2_9b45bef70f.webp 145w,https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/large_serving_smiles2_9b45bef70f.webp 800w,https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/serving_smiles2_9b45bef70f.webp 800w," sizes="100vw"></figure>&nbsp;There's a reason why I connect with the guests who eat in my restaurant. Reducing the seats has given me ample time to talk to everybody individually. Yes, it’s difficult to remember a person by his or her name, but every employee of my restaurant knows every customer, and we believe that every customer is a celebrity.Everybody is treated equally and everybody eats the same food.&nbsp;The goal for 615chutney was to make sure that everybody has access to good food served with love.&nbsp;Q:&nbsp;Beautiful concept! As we say in Indian culture, “Atithi devo bhava,” we have to give from our hearts. Once in the Nashville Voyager magazine, you mentioned, “Do good as much as you can. If you can’t do good then at least don’t do bad.” What inspired you to say that?NP: My dad always said it. I don’t know for what reason, but it went deep into my heart. With anything I do, I make sure there is a good outcome.&nbsp;<figure class="image image_resized" style="width:75%;"><img src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/serving_smiles3_66daa9d525.webp" alt="serving-smiles3.webp" srcset="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/thumbnail_serving_smiles3_66daa9d525.webp 145w,https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/large_serving_smiles3_66daa9d525.webp 670w,https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/serving_smiles3_66daa9d525.webp 670w," sizes="100vw"></figure>&nbsp;Everybody has different circumstances, everybody cannot be in the same situation as you are in. My dad was a banker, and he used one word a lot—empathize. Put yourself in their shoes and see what they are going through.Despite what they are going through, they have taken the time to drive to your restaurant. They’ve looked at your restaurant at least ten times. They have heard about you and they’ve seen your pictures, and when you’re giving food that they can cook at home, what makes your restaurant stand out? What makes your food different? So that is when I realized that customer service is key. Whoever comes, whatever situation they are in, make sure that you do your best and make sure that they eat, have a good time, and spend their time with a smile.For this, we need good ingredients, good chefs, and a good environment for employees to work in. It is not easy to source great ingredients, and sometimes your chef is upset. Sometimes a customer thinks the food is spicy, and when the food comes back to the kitchen the chef should make sure he says,“I'm sorry, let me make another one for them.”That’s what it is.It's all about giving and taking. When my dad said “Do as much good as you can and if you cannot do good then don’t do bad,” it is only this. When the food is sent back to the kitchen, my chef can be upset saying, “Come on this is not even spicy for me. Why are they doing it?” but any wrong that happens has to be fixed right away. It’s like a game where everybody wants to win, but no one wins when you don’t empathize.<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">When you give food,&nbsp; give it from your heart.</h4><hr>Q:&nbsp;Talking about ingredients, running a restaurant for the masses is a challenging task. How do you maintain your food supply chain?NP: The sourcing of ingredients is directly from India. Also, I’ve found an importer in Atlanta that guarantees the ingredients will be here within a month. When the ingredients are fresh, it shows in the food, whether you are at home or in a restaurant. If the ingredients are fresh, the food is eaten.Then comes the chef's cooking with love. Our job is to make sure that everybody who is working is happy and is enjoying what they do. When you love what you do then you will end up doing what you love. When this happens, an employer or manager will be excited saying,“My guests are enjoying the food! My chefs are cooking better food! What is the point of me having a long face?”&nbsp;What I’m trying to say is: when you give food, give it from your heart.Every guest or patron is not a dollar sign. They are your family. Food is one way you can connect to somebody, make them laugh, feel happy and light.Then, when they walk out of your restaurant, they will talk about the entire experience, not just the food, or the waiter, or the robot that serves food in my restaurant. The pandemic helped us think out of the box, so I added the robot!&nbsp;Q:&nbsp; That’s amazing. Before we wrap, what is the one thing that you would like to share with our readers as a takeaway?NP: Making sure food is available to everybody. There is no point saying, “This is good food, so I have to charge that extra dollar.” It’s all about quality and quantity, not just quantity and price. We need to make food available and accessible, and not charge extra for good food.<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">Illustrations by LAKSHMI GADDAM&nbsp;</h4><hr>

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