Laya is a sophomore at Stanford University, where she studies computer science. She loves to go on hikes, meditate, read books, and play the piano. She is experienced in the full-life cycle development of multiple apps and is passionate about developing solutions in the overlap between mental health and artificial intelligence.

Laya-Iyer.jpg

Laya Iyer

<h4
 id="h-laya-iyer-is-in-her-second-year-of-computer-science-at-stanford-university-california-she-talks-about-what-motivated-her-journey-as-a-young-researcher-and-encourages-other-young-people-to-take-up-research">
 LAYA IYER
 is in her second year of Computer Science at Stanford University,
 California. She talks about what motivated her journey as a young
 researcher, and encourages other young people to take up research.
</h4>

<hr class="vertical-space1" />


 My research journey began as a freshman in high school. I spent my first year
 noticing the enormous amounts of social, academic, and athletic pressure that
 was put on students in my districts, including self-induced pressures. Since I
 understood the implications that societal and academic pressure can have on
 the mental health of students, I wanted to see if there was a way to help
 mitigate these effects. So, in order to help the people around me, I created
 an app and I evaluated the efficacy of my app so as to contribute to the
 broader wellness-research community.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<div>
 <figure>
 <img decoding="async" width="700" alt="" class="lazyload has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/dive_research_young2_700x584_6ce4cf6738.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-13T10:23:52.124Z" />
 </figure>
</div>

<hr class="vertical-space1" />


 I have been around research from a very young age – inspired by a mother who
 pursued her Ph.D. when she had three girls under 3. This molded my mind into
 an inquisitive one. Developing a sense of curiosity helped me to be excited
 about solving problems and opened up a world of possibilities and ways of
 thinking.



 But I didn’t just stop at questioning, taking actionable steps to soothe my
 curiosity. It helped make me feel like I had a bigger purpose – giving back to
 people around the world. Helping people by proposing ways to solve problems,
 and evaluating solutions fulfills me and keeps me going through difficult
 experiences.



 When I was a sophomore in high school, my school days were academically
 intense, taking three advanced science classes at once. After school, on the
 swim team, I would practice for three hours, feeling both mentally and
 physically exhausted. But, when I came home, I was rejuvenated by working on
 something that satisfied me, that I was genuinely curious about. One of the
 best things about research is that you can work on anything you are passionate
 about and develop your ideas in that area!



 After setting up my research question and getting the study approved through
 an institutional review board, I began to collect data. For me, the most
 exciting part of there search experience is seeing all the data come in, then
 analyzing and drawing patterns among the numbers. In the analysis phase, the
 data come together like pieces of a puzzle. Eventually, you have data that
 either support your initial thought process or reveal something new.



 Being a young person in research, you also provide fresh and new perspectives
 to professionals who have been working in their field for a long time. This
 introduction of a unique perspective often helps solve complex, unsolved
 problems; or at least tests out new ideas for problems that have existed for
 an extremely long time. Contributing to a larger foundation of research work
 is a gratifying experience, as your research informs the next generation of
 researchers in your area.



 Every step of the way in the research process – whether you just want to be
 involved in the ideation phase or you really enjoy analyzing the data – you
 benefit from dipping your fingers in. If you have the opportunity to work in
 research, leap at it and flourish!


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<div>
 <figure>
 <img decoding="async" width="700" alt="" class="lazyload has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/dive_research_young3_700x584_5a269171ff.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-13T10:25:21.346Z" />
 </figure>
</div>

<hr class="vertical-space1" />

Dive into research young!

Laya is a sophomore at Stanford University, where she studies computer science. She loves to go on hikes, meditate, read books, and play the piano. She is experienced in the full-life cycle development of multiple apps and is passionate about developing solutions in the overlap between mental health and artificial intelligence.

Liaa is a sophomore at the University of Texas, majoring in Economics and Computer Science. She enjoys running, reading, and baking. She’s passionate about making mental health resources more accessible, has created two mental wellness apps, and has conducted research to explore the ways in which technology can help make the mental health journey more accessible and personal for all. 

Laya-Liaa.jpg

Laya Iyer and Liaa Kumar

<h4>
 LAYA IYER
 and
 LIAA KUMAR
 have completed their first year of college in the US. They share their
 experience of how starting college can be as smooth and enriching as
 possible.
</h4>

<hr class="vertical-space1" />


 New beginnings are great. They’re a chance to start afresh and chart a new
 course in any direction you choose. Change brings excitement and challenges,
 opportunities for growth and new experiences. Moments of transition also
 create much needed moments of reflection and allow you to re-prioritize and
 adjust your direction in life.



 Starting college last fall was our most recent new beginning. It was dizzying,
 exciting, and a little disorienting. You are away from home for the first
 time, trying to find a new and different sense of home. You’re figuring out
 your place in the world, figuring out what parts of your identity you want to
 hold onto, what parts you’ve outgrown, and what kind of person you want to
 grow into. We’ve learned a lot from our first semester of college life, about
 each other, ourselves, and the world around us.


<h3>
 Here are 10
 tips that have worked for us.
</h3>

<h4>
 #1. Be kind to your
 body.
</h4>


 Every single one of your 600 odd muscles, 200 bones, and 37 trillion something
 cells work tirelessly day in and day out to keep your body functioning.
 Imagine those tiny workers, pumping your blood, and fending off potential
 illnesses, all so you can laugh, dance and live every single day. The
 kindest thing you can do for them is eat some fruits and vegetables once in a
 while and make an effort to be physically active. Fresh air won’t hurt you!
 Listen to your body, learn to recognize when it’s tired, hungry, and thirsty.
 Make it easy for your body to stay strong and resilient. Be kind to your body
 and it will be kind to you.


<h4>
 #2. Prioritize your
 sleep.
</h4>


 College is great because life is so full of people, activities,
 thoughts, ideas. It’s tempting to skip a few hours of sleep so you don’t miss
 a single second of it. But adrenaline only lasts so long, and unless you want
 to be perpetually exhausted or unfocused during the day, you’ll always benefit
 from enough sleep the night before. Not to mention that learning to make good
 choices for yourself, especially in the face of tempting alternatives, is a
 valuable exercise in prioritizing yourself and setting boundaries. That said,
 staying up late enough to see the sunrise is a rite of passage in college;
 just consider saving it for the weekend.


<h4>
 #3. Find your own
 pace.
</h4>


 Life is not a race, it’s a marathon. Although it may seem like things and
 people around are moving at lightspeed, the most important person you’re
 competing with is yourself. Everyone is working toward their own destination,
 and if you spend all your time trying to accomplish someone else’s goals you
 might end up in a place you never wanted to be in the first place. Take some
 time to figure out what it is that you want and what to do to get
 there. Don’t be afraid to challenge and push yourself, but don’t feel like you
 have to impress anyone or live up to their expectations. Taking things at your
 own pace, even if that means slowing down once in a while, will take you much
 further than trying to sprint to the finish line.


<h4>
 #4.
 Create your own life, don’t wait for someone to tell you what to do with
 it.
</h4>


 If you don’t know what your purpose or direction in life is yet, that’s okay!
 Explore, be curious about the world, and be willing to learn something from
 every person you meet. Ask questions and create opportunities for yourself.
 People often talk about “finding themselves,” but if you don’t know what
 you’re looking for, how will you know when you’ve found it? Take time to
 figure out what kind of person you want to be and what direction you want to
 move in. It’s a powerful first step toward creating the kind of life you want.


<h4>
 #5.
 Stay true to yourself and your people will find you.
</h4>


 You’ll be meeting many new people all the time: in classes, the dining hall,
 the hallway, and at clubs. Some of them will become great friends, others will
 be friendly acquaintances. Be open to meeting new people from different
 backgrounds, and you’re guaranteed to meet people with whom you click.
 Surround yourself with people who inspire you, challenge, and encourage you to
 be the best version of yourself.


<h4>
 #6. Call
 home.
</h4>


 It’s all too easy to get caught up in the newness of everything. Remember the
 people who have taken care of you and helped make you who you are. Check in
 with them, even when nothing’s wrong. They want to know how you are. When
 you’re busy building all these new relationships, don’t forget to take care of
 the ones you came to college with.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<figure class="block-image">
 <img alt="starting-college2" class="lazyload has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/starting_college2_cef80e0f30.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-11T11:11:08.722Z" />
</figure>

<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<h4>
 #7.
 Refrain from judging, instead try to learn from the people around
 you.
</h4>


 You will meet people from a variety of backgrounds you are not familiar with.
 It’s important to be compassionate and understanding and give people the place
 to be themselves. It’s a wonderful opportunity to be inspired and learn more
 about the world. Be curious and don’t be afraid to ask questions.


<h4>
 #8. Make sure to
 connect with yourself.
</h4>


 Whether it’s through journaling, meditation, or going on a short walk, make
 sure you check in with how you’re feeling. Even the most extroverted person
 needs some downtime to recharge and reflect, so give yourself that space and
 time.&nbsp;


<h4>
 #9.
 Develop healthy coping mechanisms for stress, anger, and sadness.
</h4>


 During your transition, you will be facing a lot of emotions that you haven’t
 experienced before, or you are experiencing alone. Practices like meditation,
 relaxation, and journaling are very helpful, so don’t be afraid to use them.


<h4>
 #10. Give yourself
 the space to learn and grow!
</h4>


 It’s okay to make mistakes. Mistakes are part of being human, but what’s
 incredibly important is to learn from your mistakes and apply yourself in the
 next situation.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

10 tips for starting college

<h4>LIAA KUMAR and LAYA IYER explore the relationship between peace and our connection with the natural world.</h4>It’s an unlikely story: a lush, ecological paradise in the middle of a desert. Kanha Shanti Vanam, the global headquarters of the Heartfulness Institute, emerges from the barren landscape like a mirage. A few hundred sprawling acres of dense forest, rich soil and an abundance of greenery is situated, almost improbably, just forty kilometers outside the bustling and smog-filled city of Hyderabad.In Kanha, the trees arch gracefully overhead as they hang heavy with fruit ripe for plucking;&nbsp;stars sweep across the night sky, undiluted by any light pollution. The breeze is gentle and scented sweetly by the gardens bursting with colorful flowers weaving amongst the rows of endangered plants. Amidst it all, there is a striking sense of peace, simplicity, and profound connection with the natural world all around you.&nbsp;Kanha opened its gates in 2017 with a world-changing vision: to create a modern model of a sustainable spiritual life guided by innovative technology in conservation and ecology. It’s a global center of spirituality unlike any other, built to be a refuge not only for the soul but for nature as well, allowing people to tune into their inner and outer worlds. Looking around,&nbsp;it’s easy to forget that before the ashram was introduced to the world as a fertile sanctuary, it was home to nothing more than endless acres of dry and barren land. So how did a physical and spiritual oasis take root here?&nbsp;The first obstacle to transforming the land was enriching and nourishing the soil’s fertility. This was achieved by implementing a combination of traditional farming techniques.&nbsp;This emphasis on using natural farming methods and treating the Earth gently is rooted in the ethos of Kanha. Over the past few years, it has yielded incredibly fertile soil that is a sanctuary to the crops and gardens.&nbsp;By the time we arrived in the summer of 2022, Kanha was in full vibrant form. We had planned our visit primarily as a spiritual retreat, to recharge, reflect, and connect within ourselves. We did not anticipate the surprising role that nature and connecting with our surroundings would play in our spiritual growth that summer.&nbsp;<figure class="image"><img src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/Sustaining_soil3_5930772343.jpg"></figure>Mornings in Kanha often began with a walk, as we explored new parts of its beauty each day. But more than just morning strolls, each outing was an eye-opening lesson on the true nature and culture of Kanha. Each morning brought with it a new understanding of how powerful nature could be, and how monumental change could be created through peace and compassion.&nbsp;We began with the hydroponic farms, where the initial water constraints of the area and an emphasis on prioritizing natural techniques led to Kanha becoming a leader in innovative farming techniques. Kanha is currently home to seven hydroponic farms that are able to grow vegetation year round, without the use of any fungicides or pesticides. This culture of agriculture was vastly different from anything we had experienced in the States. We had grown accustomed to the same fruits and vegetables being available year round, which meant depending on imported produce that had been treated by pesticides and various treatments at every stage of its life cycle. Here the attitude towards produce was slower and much more purposeful. In Kanha, the natural course of the seasons determined what would grow when, and cuisine came in and out of season in time with what was growing. When you’re here it’s almost impossible to escape the draw of the ecosystem all around you. Every part of life in Kanha is intimately connected to the nature that surrounds it, even when it comes to mealtime!&nbsp;As we continued to explore, we learned that the trees lining Kanha’s pathways had been rescued from various construction and road-widening projects around the city. The Heartfulness Tree Conservation Center and the Heartyculture Nursery worked tirelessly to cultivate rare and endangered plants that were on the verge of extinction. Over six acres of land are dedicated solely to this cause, providing plenty of space for the two hundred thousand fragile saplings to take root.Like many things at Kanha, it’s an ecological project rooted in a spiritual purpose. There is a real socio-cultural, educational, and environmental value in preserving biodiversity, but there is also a spiritual one. Every unique species of flora and fauna holds irreplaceable, intrinsic value. They each play a small part in contributing to the natural balance of the larger ecosystem and thus, in preserving biodiversity, we also help to create greater harmony and balance in our natural surroundings.<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">Protecting our ecosystems and doing our best&nbsp; to preserve the natural world are increasingly important missions&nbsp; for all humanity as the effects of climate change become ever present.</h4><hr>That feeling of balance emanates past the garden walls of Kanha and into the rhythm of day-to-day life. Life revolves around the values of simplicity, spirituality, and connection. Everything is conserved and used to its fullest extent, from water to food waste to energy. People are mindful that when they take a full plate, they return an empty one. Water is collected along roadside canals when it rains, used in homes, and then returned to the Earth to nourish new plants in their growth. Early morning meditations were often accompanied by a chorus of birdsong, the sounds of different endangered species of birds or the pitter patter of rain during monsoon. Understanding and experiencing the different parts of these sustainability efforts created a profound sense of harmony, connection and ultimately peace within us.&nbsp;We are not the only ones to have observed this connection between sustainability and peace; in fact, it is an ongoing area of research. <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S2589811622000210?via%3Dihub">Hiroshima University</a> recently conducted a study which displayed the interconnected nature of “environmentalism and Positive Peace, as well as how improvements in one area can aid improvements in the other.” As we continue to tune into the natural world around us, helping it to grow and thrive, we find profound connections to something within us as well.&nbsp;<figure class="image"><img src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/Sustaining_soil2_920c9592d4.jpg"></figure>Protecting our ecosystems and doing our best to preserve the natural world are increasingly important missions for all humanity as the effects of climate change become ever present. The fact remains that abundant natural resources and secure ecosystems around the world are cornerstones of stable and healthy communities. Sometimes, thinking about the overwhelming work ahead, it can feel like a losing battle. But as we envision the world we want to live in and leave behind, we look at Kanha as a symbol of spirituality and sustainability. And most importantly, a reminder of the powerful changes that can take place when a community comes together to create peace.<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">Illustrations by ANANYA PATEL</h4><hr>&nbsp;

Sustaining the soul, nurturing the earth

Leah has a background in curriculum development and teaching, with a speciality in Social Emotional Learning (SEL) for children. She is a Certified Yoga teacher, Heartfulness trainer and the creator of "Heartful Movement," a social emotional learning program for children, blending yoga, cooperative games, relaxation techniques, and journaling.

Leah-Rich2.jpg

Leah Rich

<h4
 id="h-leah-rich-shares-her-experiences-of-an-intercultural-marriage-and-the-richness-it-brings-to-the-various-communications-that-happen-day-to-day-among-her-husband-son-and-herself">
 LEAH RICH shares her experiences of an
 intercultural marriage, and the richness it brings to the various communications that happen day-to-day among
 her husband, son, and herself.</h4>
<hr class="vertical-space1">
I want to share a fond memory of something that started when my husband, Jayendran Muthushankar, and I first met. He
 is from Chennai in India, and his mother tongue is Tamil, but he’s lived in many parts of Asia and speaks Burmese,
 Thai, and Japanese, as well as English and Hindi. While I am from the US and English is my mother tongue, I grew up
 learning Hebrew and some Yiddish. And I learned to speak Mandarin while living in China.&nbsp;
So, while we communicated in English, we quickly found ourselves introducing new words from other languages we knew,
 as they seemed a better fit for what we wanted to express. It started with introducing greetings and “good night” to
 each other in Burmese, Hebrew, Tamil, Chinese, Thai, and Japanese.
This has continued, and is also a part of our communication with our 11-year-old son. For example, our son will
 respond with “nahi” (no in Hindi) when he doesn’t want something. My husband uses the Yiddish
 “fukakt” to refer to a situation or an object that isn’t working, or isn’t quite right. He also says
 “xiexie” (Mandarin) to say thank you. And when I’m offered food, I’ll say “podum” (Tamil) to
 indicate that I’ve received enough food.
And the Burmese word “Mingalaba” means “May you be blessed.”
<hr class="vertical-space1">

The richness of many languages

Leslie is a Heartfulness practitioner and trainer living in the US. A retired editor, she knows that words—as hard as she may try to find the right ones—are inadequate to express our most treasured experiences and connections. But she keeps trying!

Leslie-Blair.webp

Leslie Blair

&nbsp;<hr>&nbsp;Take the love in the touch, it doesn’t matter very much if the hand is perfect or the skin is rough.Take the laugh in the cough and the drenching of the rain, there is humor in our troubles and it serves to keep us sane.Take the rest in the night, leave your worries in your shoes. In the morning shake them out and don’t listen to the news.Take time with a neighbor, she’ll have news enough to share. You can ruminate together and find contentment there.Take the lesson from the error, without carrying the past. Keep the best it had to give you, nothing more was meant to last.Take heart: When everything you tried seemed not to be enough, your part was matched and multiplied if love was in the touch.<hr>&nbsp;<hr>&nbsp;<h4 style="text-align:center;">Poem by LESLIE BLAIR</h4>&nbsp;<hr>

Take heart

<h4 style="text-align:justify;">LESLIE BLAIR shares the profound nature of a dream, which she almost missed. How often do we receive these gifts without realizing it?</h4>The dream caught me napping on a sad Sunday afternoon, the kind of dream you can count on one hand even after seven decades of dreaming, the kind that maybe wasn’t a dream after all, but a visitation.I almost missed it—a choir of voices, celestial music already receding, my consciousness hurtling through space, away, back from the dream and the voices—my mind trying desperately to slow the return and capture the unspeakably beautiful melodies and harmonies.In the instant that was left, I realized the music would be lost. But there were words! I hadn’t noticed them before, and I caught the last ones I could hear.Coming back to wakefulness, I hurriedly reached for pen and paper and wrote them down: “Let thy soul be couched in merest gladness.”Not being accustomed to this kind of language, my rough interpretation went something like this: “Let your soul be hidden in the least bit of gladness.”In no way did this match the exquisite beauty of the music I had heard. Feeling terribly disappointed, I went to the dictionary in hopes of finding something better. It did not disappoint.These are the definitions I found: Couch—to express, to reveal. Mere—pure, unmixed.The celestial code was cracked. The message read: “Let your soul express itself in pure, unmixed gladness.”A message from a heavenly realm brought down to earth by an everyday dictionary. Who can say where help will come from?&nbsp;

Dream choir

<h4 style="text-align:justify;">LESLIE BLAIR went from seeing death as a tragic endpoint to valuing the ongoing relationship with a loved one and the ongoing journey of the soul. She shares that journey with us here.</h4>&nbsp;For a long time after my mother passed away, I continued to struggle with difficult emotions surrounding her loss. I wrote to my spiritual teacher, Chariji, whose reply gave me a path forward at what seemed like a dead end. He wrote, in part: “Now you must pray for the peace of her soul. In this will be your true service to her.”I was struck by the thought that I could actually be of service to someone dear who was no longer alive on this Earth. I had no idea how to pray for the peace of a soul, but Chariji had given me a task—both challenging and promising—something useful and positive to focus on and incorporate in my daily meditation practice. It was the start of a journey in prayer that would, over time, come to include the remembrance of other loved ones.At some point along the way, my feelings of bereavement and bewilderment began to take the shape of a song. Searching for the right words became a seemingly endless process, one that defied completion, but it has yielded a growing assurance that love is stronger than death, and that our connection with those who have moved on continues to grow—no doubt in a different way and perhaps in a different realm, one that awaits us with open arms.The song was written in the first person, but I’ve always wanted it to ring true for others as well. May it resonate with your own songs of comfort, connection, and healing.&nbsp;<figure class="image image_resized" style="width:75%;"><img src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/here_hereafter2_4d6b235d1a.webp" alt="here-hereafter2.webp" srcset="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/thumbnail_here_hereafter2_4d6b235d1a.webp 145w,https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/large_here_hereafter2_4d6b235d1a.webp 801w,https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/here_hereafter2_4d6b235d1a.webp 801w," sizes="100vw"></figure>&nbsp;<h3 style="text-align:center;">Wherever We Are</h3>I will reach for you, I’ll remember you,&nbsp; and I know I’ll find your touch everywhere. There’s a part of you in everything I do,&nbsp; but the smile I knew no longer waits there.They say there’s a road to where you are—&nbsp; it’s not on the map, but it can’t be too far. If you’ve gone to stay, there must be a way to where you are.In a hidden world, hard to see or touch, another life is calling you home. So I send a prayer to see you safely there&nbsp; as your soul returns to its own.They say there’s a guide where you are,&nbsp; to show you the way like your own shining star. There must be a friend, true to the end, where you are.We reach for a hand, gentle and strong, to comfort and mend us and shepherd us along&nbsp; a well-traveled path crossing the night, where storms of the heart make way for redeeming light.When a sudden shower washes the earth and sky&nbsp; and a brighter world shimmers through, heaven reaches down, hovering all around, and I know its promise is true:&nbsp;Love is the way to where you are— &nbsp; it comes like the rainbow, spanning far, out of thin air, connecting us, wherever we are.A shower of light, a rainbow of tears,&nbsp; will shine through the night to quiet our fears. The love that we share embraces us&nbsp; wherever we are.Our love is a prayer, blessing us&nbsp; wherever we are.&nbsp;

From here to the hereafter

Leslie Lyons

<hr class="vertical-space1">
As I watch my daughters 
navigate an imperfect world, 
a world that is cruel and 
at times crushing, 
I see them searching for the light 
as a way of being.
They are advocates for their own souls.
What better way to be is there in all the universe? 
They are oriented toward success and service 
as creators, 
as spirits of possibility and 
as stewards of compassion. 
I am paying so much attention to them. 
What I can witness and appreciate 
is more powerful than what I can teach them now. 
But I still want to share what I have learned and 
collected here. Yes, it is a sharing, not a teaching as 
I feel that I am still so early on this journey. I am still learning.
A spiritual life is critical to balance and grow in this life. 
This is both intuitive and scientifically true, I have learned. 
We are energy, we are vibration. 
There is a hum in the universe that we can meet, 
that we can match and align ourselves with and be whole.
How absolutely blissful is that? 
The most ancient language we have on Earth – 
Sanskrit – even has a phrase for this. It is 
SAT CHIT ANANDA, the place of blissful truth. 
Truth bliss.
Let us be there together.
Love, 
Mama
<hr class="vertical-space1">
<hr>
<h4 style="text-align: center;">Poem by LESLIE LYONS</h4>
<hr>

Poem for my daughters

lia-hills.webp

Lia Hills

Stories

Liaa is a sophomore at the University of Texas, majoring in Economics and Computer Science. She enjoys running, reading, and baking. She’s passionate about making mental health resources more accessible, has created two mental wellness apps, and has conducted research to explore the ways in which technology can help make the mental health journey more accessible and personal for all. 

Liaa-Kumar-scaled.jpg

Liaa Kumar

<h4
 class="block-heading"
 id="h-liaa-kumar-lost-her-mother-to-cancer-when-she-was-a-teenager-now-she-s-helping-others-by-volunteering-at-kesem-an-organization-that-helps-children-of-cancer-patients-to-develop-resilience-confidence-and-lasting-feelings-of-joy-and-hope-her-story-of-grief-and-hope-will-touch-your-heart"
 >
 LIAA KUMAR
 lost her mother to cancer when she was a teenager. Now she’s helping
 others by volunteering at Kesem, an organization that helps children
 of cancer patients to develop resilience, confidence, and lasting
 feelings of joy and hope. Her story of grief and hope will touch your
 heart.
 </h4>

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 
 Life stopped being normal two weeks before my eighth grade graduation,
 when my mom was diagnosed with cervical cancer. At 13, I didn’t know
 much about cancer, and I didn’t know how to understand the heaviness
 with which the adults around me whispered, “Stage four.” My mother began
 chemo that summer and decided to undergo treatment overseas, in India,
 with the support of family. I went with her.
 

 
 As a kid, you take the idea of having a parent for granted. It’s a given
 that your parents will stick around, that they’ll always be strong,
 always be ready to take care of you. And even as I began to understand
 the gravity of my mom’s diagnosis, I believed more than anything that
 this was temporary. I knew my mom, she was indescribably strong, she was
 my rock, so of course she would be okay. She would be okay because I
 needed her to be okay. That’s what moms do. They look out for their
 kids. Always.
 

 
 That summer I spent a lot of time in small cold rooms, trying to
 understand the ways in which my mom was changing. No one warns you about
 how much cancer takes from the people you love. Her body withered, and
 chemo left dark streaks on her skin that ran up and down her arms and
 legs. She felt nauseous most of the time, and making sure she was eating
 enough became an everyday worry.
 

 
 I supported her body as we inched our way up and down the handful of
 stairs outside the hospital. Sitting across the floor from your mom, a
 row of orange pill bottles lined up between you, begging and bargaining
 for every pill or protein supplement that had to be taken, turns your
 world upside down.
 

 
 My mother and I became closer. In between the stress and sadness we
 watched movies, played card games, practiced tying her head scarf in
 different ways around her newly bald head, and talked. We did a lot of
 talking. Mostly we talked about what we’d like to do once this whole
 nightmare was over. Fly to Europe, visit a monastery in the Himalayas,
 finally go to the beach again. It was difficult to say goodbye at the
 end of the summer. It was difficult to leave her behind and face the
 idea of beginning high school without my mom, but even as I said
 goodbye, I knew it would only be a matter of time before she came back
 and everything would be normal again.
 

 
 Without my mom at home, I had to learn a lot of things on the fly.
 Suddenly, there was no one at home to wake me up in the morning, remind
 me to clean my room, do my laundry, or make my lunch. I learned how to
 grocery shop and the basics of housekeeping, and I missed my mom very
 much. The responsible parts of growing up aren’t much fun, especially
 when they’re all crammed into the span of a few months, and especially
 when it feels like the people around you don’t really understand what
 you’re going through.
 

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <hr />

 <h4 class="has-text-align-center block-heading">
 The responsible parts of growing up aren’t much fun, especially when they’re all crammed into the span of a few months, and especially when it feels like the people around you don’t really understand what you’re going through.
 </h4>

 <hr />

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 
 I spoke to my mom a few times a week, on the rare occasions she wasn’t
 in chemo or exhausted from chemo. I felt like she was slipping away even
 through the phone, and I’d hold it closer to my ear as if that’d bring
 her back. The good news that kept me going was that she was doing
 better. A miraculous feat for someone who had been diagnosed so late. I
 knew it was temporary, she was going to get better, and she was getting
 better. Until she wasn’t.
 

 
 My mom passed away near the end of my freshman year, and it felt like an
 unsatisfactory end to a draining emotional affair. Grief is its own
 monster, but so is the entire process of losing a loved one to cancer.
 Most kids don’t spend their adolescence worrying about hospital bills,
 doctors’ appointments, or a parent’s white blood cell count. It can be a
 very isolating experience.
 

 
 Most people can understand loss, but not everyone understands what
 cancer feels like. So, at Kesem we remind the kids that they still
 deserve to be kids. We remind them they’re not in this alone.
 

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <hr />

 <h4 class="has-text-align-center block-heading">
 At Kesem we remind the kids that they still deserve to be kids. We remind them they’re not in this alone.
 </h4>

 <hr />

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 
 I am so incredibly grateful that I’ve found this organization and these
 people, that I have the opportunity to help these strong, wonderful,
 amazing kids. And I am so incredibly excited that you may decide to join
 us. We’re gonna do great things this year! I can’t wait.

When a parent has cancer

Dr. Lilla Watson (born 1940) is a Murri (Indigenous Australian) visual artist, activist and academic working in the field of Women's issues and Indigenous epistemology. Watson was the inaugural president of the Aboriginal and Islander Child Care Agency, a founding member of the Brisbane Indigenous Media Association, and a member of the Aboriginal and Islander Independent School Board in the late 1980s. She has been a consultant and a member of working groups, panels and selection committees for many Government and non-Government bodies.

Lilla Watson.webp

Lilla Watson

Let us work together

Mary Jean "Lily" Tomlin is an American actress, comedian, writer, singer, and producer. Tomlin started her career in stand-up comedy and sketch comedy before acting onstage and on-screen. She has received seven Emmy Awards, a Grammy Award, two Tony Awards, the Kennedy Center Honor in 2014, and the Screen Actors Guild Life Achievement Award in 2017.

Lily_Tomlin.jpeg

Lily Tomlin

Try slowing down

Lisa lives in South Africa and is a writer, New Insights life coach, and currently training to become a recovery coach through the Foundation Clinic. Lisa is passionate about empowering people, conscious awareness and being a flame of love. Her life experience has taught her about the importance of change in one’s life and to always learn, unlearn and relearn.

lisa-ann-catano-img.jpg

Lisa Ann Catano

<h4>LISA ANN CATANO shares some of the research findings in epigenetics that show us that our genes are affected by our beliefs and thinking more than we realise.</h4><hr>Dr Bruce Lipton, a cellular biologist who was at the University of Wisconsin cloning human muscle cells, is best known for challenging the existing belief that the human body is controlled by genes. In his video, The Biology of Perception, he demonstrates to the audience that perception affects biology.He found the following:In one of his experiments a stem cell was isolated and put into a petri dish (a cell-culture dish) where it divided every ten hours. The cells were then split up into three groups and placed into separate petri dishes. In each of the three dishes the growth medium in which the cells lived was different. In the first dish the cells formed bone, in the second dish they formed muscle, and in the third dish they formed fat cells. All of the cells were genetically identical when they were first separated, yet each dish produced different results.<hr>Dr Lipton’s research is life changing for&nbsp;all of us, because his research enunciates that we have the power to choose our destiny at any given point. From victims we can become masters of our lives as we can determine how we respond to the environment.<hr>Why was this so? Since the genes were all identical the differences were because of the environment in which they were placed. The environment was the stimulus to which the cells responded. Genes respond to their environment. It is the genes’ perception of their environment that causes them to behave in a certain way.We have been taught that our genes determine our lives – our behavior, emotions, character, health and biology. We have been educated to believe that we do not have any control over our lives. We have been told that our genes are inherited from our family and we are a victim to this heredity: if there is cancer in your family you are vulnerable to that illness; if your father or mother were prone to addiction, you will to some extent be the same, or feel entitled to justify similar behavior. This brings about a feeling of powerlessness, that your life is destined to be a certain way because of your genes. So a kind of apathy takes over, a ‘Why should I try?’ attitude.Dr Lipton’s research is life changing for all of us, because his research enunciates that we have the power to choose our destiny at any given point. From victims we can become masters of our lives as we can determine how we respond to the environment. Of course the genetic patterns are there, but they are not as fixed as we once believed.<hr>Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom. – Viktor E. Frankl<hr>You were born into the world without any beliefs and since you learned to believe certain things by your parents, education and social systems; you have the ability to unlearn them and try new ones. As you change your thinking, you change your mind and biology, which culminates in an evolved reality.In addition to the new understanding that perception influences behavior, Dr Lipton goes even deeper by saying that perception not only influences genes, but it also rewrites them! Like any living being the cell is a conscious organism. By virtue of its state of consciousness the cells perception of the environment is what controls the gene. In his study, Dr Lipton provides proof of how a belief actually switches on a gene.To demonstrate the power of belief, let’s take the example of our beloved insect, the bumble bee. Aerodynamically the bumble bee is not really designed to fly. This is apparent in observing its rounded hairy body that is much larger than the little wings that struggle to carry it. Now imagine that someone repeatedly told the bumble bee at a young that she was not designed for flight; do you suppose she would be flying today? Of course not and yet the bumble bee flies nonetheless, even if a bit clumsily at times. Belief is powerful and at times can often override the most logical reasoning.<hr>When the mind&nbsp;is peaceful, we&nbsp;are free from worries and mental discomfort, and we begin to experience true happiness. In this state of grace and Godliness, healing can be restored.<hr><h4>A Medical Example</h4>Carl G. Jung in his autobiography, Memories, Dreams, Reflections, describes a patient sent by an American colleague with the accompanying diagnosis, “Alcoholic neurasthenia: incurable.” Jung discovered that the patient was struggling to hold onto his manhood in a tyrannical relationship with his mother. According to Jung she was a “power devil”. She owned a large firm where the son worked and was very unhappy. Due to her power games he chose to drink as a way of self- medicating. He did not have the adequate self-belief or strength of character to stand up to her, or resign from the comfort of the wealthy family business.Jung took the initiative, behind his back, to give his mother a medical certificate stating his inability to carry out his work-related responsibilities due to his alcoholism, and recommended his redundancy. Although the man was furious with Jung (albeit an unethical move for a medical practitioner), he went on to create a life in which he thrived. He built a successful career, among other things, and his wife was extremely grateful to Jung for his instinctive approach to what seemed like a hopeless case. The man gave up drinking and his character developed and strengthened handsomely.This is a fine example of a man who generated a wholesome life and personality by changing the constituents of his environment. By removing himself from a negative situation that did no service to his character, he was able to create a new life.<h4>Remedy</h4>Meditation and visualisation are strong repertoires for holistic health and vitality. Studies illustrate that meditation can diminish all kinds of physical diseases and psychological disorders. The immune system, blood pressure, pain response, stress hormone levels and even cellular health can all be improved. Psychologically, meditation reduces depression and anxiety disorders, ADHD, bipolar disorder, addiction and eating disorders among others.Meditation actually makes structural changes to the brain and reprograms the DNA. The way neurons communicate with each other can change and thus create new circuits. Some brain regions become denser than others and others become less dense. Neurogenesis and neuroplasticity improve, including memory, critical thinking and overall cognitive functionality.Meditation alters perception and the mind. It is a method for acquainting our minds with virtue. The more familiar our mind is with virtue, the calmer and more peaceful it becomes. When the mind is peaceful, we are free from worries and mental discomfort, and we begin to experience true happiness. In this state of grace and Godliness, healing can be restored. Thus, the practice of meditation confirms the outcome of Dr Lipton’s experiments, which state that perception influences genes and can also rewrite them.SOURCESThe Biology of Perception, Dr Bruce Lipton. <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WnmaiWWZ3fc" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WnmaiWWZ3fc</a>Kymatica, Ben Stewart. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dfc7nXNPVz4Memories, Dreams, Reflections, C.G. Jung &amp; Aniella Jaffe, 1963, Pantheon Books.Meditation Health Benefits: What The Practice Does To Your Body, Meredith Melnick.https://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/04/30/meditation-health-benefits_n_3178731.htmlThe New Meditation Handbook, Geshe Kelsang Gyatso, 2013, Tharpa Publications.Psychology, John W. Santrock, 7th edition, 2003, Chapter 6: ‘States of Consciousness’, McGraw-Hill College.<hr>Article by LISA ANN CATANO<hr>

Home› Contributors