Kajal is currently working in the Clinical Trials industry and is also a trained Life Coach. She has a Ph.D. in Cardiovascular Science and has done research in Oncology, Cardio Metabolic and Neuroscience. She is an avid reader, and is passionate about meditation, well-being, conscious parenting, and finding joy in little things.

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Kajal Gupta

<h4>KAJAL GUPTA shares her experience of first-time parenting, and how it has opened her awareness and helped her grow.</h4>To me, mindfulness is tuning in and being aware of my present thoughts, feelings, and emotions (or lack of) without any judgment. It is being in the “here and now.” I’ve been practicing meditation for many years now, so going inward has become a way of life for me. With this in mind, I enthusiastically embarked upon motherhood feeling that I had it all together. How naïve was I, because as Dr. Shefali Tsabary puts it, “letting go of control over our children is probably the hardest spiritual task we face as parents.” As part of this ongoing journey, here are five tenets of mindful parenting I’ve picked up along the way, as something I not only relate to but also try to live by.<h4 style="text-align:justify;">1) Truly know, understand, and experience your child as they really are, separate from you.&nbsp;</h4>Yes, you can plan all you want – your child’s clothes, the nursery décor, whether you decide to breast- or bottle-feed, when to introduce solids, and your parenting style, too – but you can’t plan your child’s temperament. Each child is different; you’ll have to tailor your parenting style to meet your child’s needs and temperament. I decided to breastfeed for six months and then move to bottle-feeding, but my baby decided to enter my life as a milk snob, refusing all the bottles in the world. I decided to introduce solids at six months, but baby decided he was ready to taste his first fruit at 4.5 months. I got beautifully-crafted wooden toys, but baby was interested in all the overly colorful, loud, and ugly plastic ones! The point I’m trying to make is: tune into your child’s needs moment-to-moment instead of dumping your expectations on them.“When you parent, it’s crucial you realize you aren’t raising a ‘mini me,’ but a spirit throbbing with its own signature. For this reason, it’s important to separate who you are from who each of your children is. Children aren’t ours to possess or own in any way. When we know this in the depths of our soul, we tailor our raising of them to their needs, rather than molding them to fit our needs.”&nbsp; —The Conscious Parent by Dr. Shefali Tsabary<figure class="image image-style-align-center"><img src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/5tips_mindful_parenting2_ba9018c88d.jpg"></figure><h4 style="text-align:justify;">2) Whenever you are doing anything with your children, be with them 100%.&nbsp;</h4>As with any mindfulness practice, give your full attention to that moment instead of thinking of the future or the past. I know, and experience daily, how difficult this can be with today’s fast-paced life. But I always try to be fully present with my child when I’m with him. I’ve found the best way is to encourage independent play and not intervene unnecessarily; it is truly magical to observe them at play and see into their world!“Play is children’s main way of communicating. To stop a child from playing is like stopping an adult from talking and thinking. To control every minute of their play is like controlling every word someone says.”&nbsp; —Playful Parenting by Lawrence Cohen<h4 style="text-align:justify;">3) Try not to take other’s comments too personally.&nbsp;</h4>This was a tough one for me, and something I still struggle with if I do not work on myself. Having a baby makes every person around you believe that they not only have a say in raising that child, but that their way is the best way! As if the initial hormonal overwhelm of having a baby plus keeping the baby alive are not enough, people shower you with their unsolicited advice and comments. This does not seem to stop after the first few weeks of giving birth, but goes on in cycles – how to sleep train, how to potty train, how to avoid toddler tantrums, how to discipline, the list is endless!Again, try to swim your way out of this ocean of how-tos, step back, observe your child and yourself, and decide what’s best for both of you. It is important to build your own “village” – your network of support and inspiration – but a village that feels safe for both of you. Remember, your true tribe also knows when to shut up and just listen.“It takes a village to raise a child.”&nbsp; —African Proverb<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">Try to swim your way out of this ocean of how-tos,&nbsp; step back, observe your child and yourself,&nbsp; and decide what’s best for both of you.</h4><hr><h4>4) During emotional outbursts and tantrums, first connect, then redirect.&nbsp;</h4>We often react to tantrums instead of responding to them. Consequences and lessons are ineffective when a child’s emotions are running high. And why just children, it is the same with adults, too. Instead of punishments, using a calm attitude to hold the child through their emotions allows your calmness to rub off, giving way to receptiveness and understanding.“When little people are overwhelmed by big emotions, it’s our job to share our calm, not join their chaos.”&nbsp; —L.R. Knost<h4>5) This is a journey of learning for both you and your child.&nbsp;</h4>Parenting is not hierarchical; in fact, over this last year or so, I’ve learnt so much more from my child than I ever anticipated. Learn together, laugh together, cry together, and grow together! Just like you, your children deserve to feel that they are loved and adored, just because they exist, not when they are disciplined, not when they get straight As, or not when they are successful individuals.<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">Learn together, laugh together,&nbsp; cry together, and grow together!</h4><hr><figure class="image image-style-align-center"><img src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/5tips_mindful_parenting3_d109c84886.jpg"></figure>Even as we attempt to do our best at parenting, we cannot fully know where their lives will take them; we can only love our children, accept them and honor the mystery of their being. Do your best, be authentic, and express gratitude for this opportunity to evolve spiritually.&nbsp;“Your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself… They come through you but not from you, And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.”&nbsp; —Kahlil Gibran

5 easy tips for mindful parenting

Kalyani is a health law attorney and writer who lives in Houston, Texas, with her husband and two sons. She is a mental health and mindfulness advocate who went on a journey to find happiness, discovered how to help others be happy, and has become a more authentic version of herself.

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Kalyani Adusumilli

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<h4>
 KALYANI ADUSUMILLI
 compares wants and needs, and explores how the simple life helps us keep a check on needs
 and wants, leading to contentment and happiness.
</h4>



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To truly find contentment, it is commonly thought that we must distinguish between our needs and wants. Needs
 imply basic requirements to survive, such as water, air, and food; in other words, that which we cannot live
 without. But typically, we also include the intangible, like friendship, love, and security, among our needs.




Needs are supposed to be less than our wants, so we approach life practically. After all, we can want anything,
 including flying to the moon! Generally speaking, our wants are things we assume will improve our life somehow.
 But as our society grows more materialistic, our wants are often frivolous, not to mention numerous.



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 </figure>
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What happens when we have too many needs, though? These days the line between needs and wants has become
 increasingly blurry. One could argue that humankind’s continuing progress, especially technological advancement,
 naturally leads to a shift in what we now consider a need.



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<h4 class="has-text-align-center">There’s a reason
 simplicity works better. There’s less
 clutter in our
 minds and more room to focus on what truly makes us thrive – health, happiness, a
 sense of purpose, and love.</h4>



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But then, is that actual progress if our needs are more complex as a result? How many of us consider a smartphone
 a need? They certainly make life convenient. But at the expense of what? Are we happier and more productive? For
 me, it’s a resounding “No!”



There’s a reason simplicity works better. There’s less clutter in our minds and more room to focus on what truly
 makes us thrive – health, happiness, a sense of purpose, and love. As our needs grow, so do our stress levels
 and reliance on the external. But with less dependence, there is more freedom. Freedom to be.



What if we took a step back to when we had everything that we needed simply by waking up to a new day, a fresh
 chance at living fully? Back when we treated our planet more gently, in appreciation of its beauty and its
 bounty. Back when we walked across the street and knocked at a neighbor’s house to pass the time. Back when we
 just needed the bare minimum to flourish because we had everything that we needed in each other.



What do you really need?



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<h4 class="has-text-align-center">Illustrations by HOLLY</h4>



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What do you need?

<h4>
 KALYANI ADUSUMILLI went on a journey
 to
 find happiness for herself. In the process, she discovered how to help
 others be happy, and how to become a more authentic version of
 herself.
</h4>

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 Happiness has become a mainstream concept these days. Does happiness hinge on
 meeting society’s expectations? How often do superficial trappings such as
 social status, physical appearance, and financial success determine happiness?
 We’ve often heard the old adage, “Money can’t buy happiness,” but do only the
 wealthy come to that conclusion? For a person stuck in poverty, money could
 offer happiness in the form of a well-fed belly and a roof over their head.
 And consider social media. The number of Instagram followers and “retweets”
 electrifies the young and propels them to seek spotlight as their source of
 happiness, while the older generations look on in bemusement. So, who gets to
 decide what it means to be happy?



 Over the past couple of years, as I took stock of the pandemic that brought
 the modern world to its knees and left people in isolation, I reached the
 conclusion that the power to create happiness lies within me. Within you.
 Within each of us. That might seem obvious, but upon further reflection, very
 few of us actually utilize the power we wield. As I struggled to make sense of
 the tragedies occurring around the world and in my own personal sphere,
 happiness seemed both a distant memory and an unlikely future. Realizing that
 I needed an outlet, I sought therapy and spent the Covid lockdown trying to
 navigate my troubled past and conquer my fears about the future, with the hope
 that I might learn to live fully in the present.


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 <img decoding="async" width="566" height="800" alt="Happiness_takes_courage2" class="lazyload has-img-center"
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 </figure>
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 Because of the decision to focus on well-being, I developed a heightened sense
 of self-awareness, which led me to understand more about the source of
 happiness. All too often, we either look to others to define our happiness or
 hold them responsible for it. I realized that as long as I continue to blame
 my parents for my lifelong anxieties or expect my spouse to provide the cure
 for my discontent, I will never achieve true happiness. I began to contemplate
 what “happy” meant to me.



 Before long, I could admit that happiness meant more than just my roles as a
 mother and a spouse, and that I had never felt entirely fulfilled in my career
 as a lawyer. I wanted more. I wanted to live life on my terms for the first
 time, not on everyone else’s. Happiness wasn’t just about the big-ticket
 items, but trickled down to the details, like how much sleep I was getting
 each night, and how much time I was allotting for simple acts of self-care.
 “Happy” now seemed attainable, and I felt transformed. That transformation
 manifested visibly to my family and friends, much to their wonder and awe.


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<hr />

<h4 class="has-text-align-center">
 Happiness wasn’t just about the big-ticket items, but
 trickled down
 to the details, like how much sleep I was getting each night, 
 and how much time I was allotting for simple acts of self-care.
 “Happy” now seemed attainable, and I felt transformed.
 
</h4>

<hr />

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 If it’s so obvious that the way to happiness rests at our own feet, then why
 do we not exercise our autonomy? With everyone so interconnected through
 technology, the pressure of conforming places an enormous burden on the
 choices that we make. We’re so busy taking cues from everyone else that we
 don’t take the time to stop and reflect on what we need. Many of us hide
 behind fears of rejection, failure, and ostracization. And when we find
 ourselves disappointed or thwarted, it’s far easier to point fingers at others
 and deflect responsibility.&nbsp;



 A recent interaction with my eldest son, a high school senior, comes to mind.
 His teenage self has been a force to be reckoned with over the past couple of
 years. One day he stormed into my room, frustrated and angry about the
 restrictions on his screen time during the school year. Insisting that no
 other parents exerted that kind of control, he declared that we were making
 his life miserable. At first, I tried to reason with him, explaining that his
 oversleeping and lax attitude about his homework had resulted in those
 restrictions. I assured him that all parents want their children to thrive in
 school and that we were hardly the exceptions.



 When my words fell on deaf ears, I waited until his anger was spent. Then, I
 told him that while we had his best interest at heart, he alone could decide
 whether to stay mired in his frustrations or alter the landscape. Eager to
 give him the benefit of what I had started to embrace, I told him that he
 could continue to complain and remain miserable or figure out a way to be
 happy. Calling attention to his desire for freedom, I hinted that he could
 show his maturity by acting more responsibly, earning the right to manage his
 time without supervision. I’m happy to say that he went on to do just that,
 with some stumbles along the way, ultimately resulting in a happier kid and
 happier parents.



 This leads me to another observation – cultivating happiness inevitably
 fosters a happy environment and leads to healthier relationships with family,
 friends, and colleagues.&nbsp;&nbsp;


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 <figure>
 <img decoding="async" width="566" height="800" alt="/Happiness_takes_courage3" class="lazyload has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/Happiness_takes_courage3_bf87c3d16e.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-10T09:46:22.552Z" />
 </figure>
</div>

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<h4 class="has-text-align-center"
 id="h-happiness-is-so-very-individual-and-cannot-be-designed-by-anyone-else-creating-our-own-happiness-takes-courage">
 Happiness is so very individual and cannot be designed by
 anyone
 else. Creating our own happiness takes courage.
</h4>

<hr />

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 In essence, we forget that what makes us human is our beautifully complex
 brain and the ability to reason and think for ourselves. Happiness is so very
 individual and cannot be designed by anyone else. Creating our own happiness
 takes courage. It requires an unshakeable commitment to stay true to
 ourselves, and a fierce determination to follow through with our passions,
 regardless of the outcome and in the face of adversity. Happiness demands that
 we place self-worth and well-being as priorities in our life so that we be
 authentic. Whether we live more than one lifetime or not remains a mystery, so
 with that uncertainty we would do well to remember another old saying, “Life
 isn’t a dress rehearsal.” Choose to be happy now and be the architect of your
 own happiness. You are in the driver’s seat.


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<h4 class="has-text-align-center">Illustrations by JASMEE MUDGAL</h4>

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Happiness takes courage

KALYANI ADUSUMILLI
 highlights the need for asking for help, and for self-compassion and
 self-love. She challenges us to come together to eradicate the stigma
 around mental illness, so that we can all open up about our struggles
 and overcome them.
 

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 Giving up may seem like the only option when you’re at your lowest. But
 there’s a better one – reaching out.
 

 
 Often, we ignore the cracks in our emotional and mental well-being until
 we’re suddenly staring down an abyss. Climbing out from that darkness
 back into the light is possible. The first step of that ascent is to
 accept that you need a hand. None of us was ever meant to walk a
 solitary path.
 

 
 I tried to carry my burdens on my own for decades, until they became too
 heavy. When that happens, escape becomes tempting, unless you remember
 to look up and grasp that outstretched hand, the lifeline waiting to
 steady you, reminding you that you’re not alone.
 

 
 Building yourself back up also requires self-compassion. Only then can
 hope emerge and healing begin. Hope comes in all forms – the promise of
 a second chance or the discovery of a purpose in this life. I know
 firsthand the power of hope in healing and transforming darkness into
 light. But I had to make room for it and let it take the lead, so I
 could stare down my fears. Asking for help when you’re faltering is not
 a sign of weakness, though we may be at our most vulnerable in that
 moment. Rather, it’s a testament to our mind’s power, our insight into
 our limits as humans, and our resourcefulness. In truth, it’s an act of
 courage, a show of strength, to suppress the ego and to admit that we’re
 struggling. Ultimately, it reflects our desire to rise again. If we
 avoid the issues that stress our minds and wreak havoc on our emotions,
 it is then that we weaken, and our ability to fight back becomes
 compromised. It’s no different than a disease attacking our immune
 system. Do we not seek treatment for bodily ailments?
 

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 <hr />

 <h4
 class="has-text-align-center"
 id="h-building-yourself-back-up-also-requires-self-compassion-only-then-can-hope-emerge-and-healing-begin-hope-comes-in-all-forms-the-promise-of-a-second-chance-or-the-discovery-of-a-purpose-in-this-life"
 >
 Building yourself back up also requires self-compassion.
 Only then can hope emerge and healing begin. Hope
 comes in all forms – 
 the promise of a second chance or 
 the discovery of a purpose in this life.
 
 </h4>

 <hr />

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 We place great value on caring for our physical health. Without our
 pumping heart and powerful lungs, how would we survive? But what
 controls those organs? The most complex and beautiful organ of our body,
 the brain, responsible also for the workings of our mind and
 consciousness. So why do we not similarly care for our mental and
 emotional wellness? The body and mind are interconnected, so if one
 declines, so will the other. Just as we schedule annual physicals for
 our body, what if we regularly schedule wellness checks for our mental
 and emotional health?
 

 
 People tend to focus on longevity over happiness. For me, the prospect
 of a meaningful and purposeful life (be it a short one) characterized by
 mental peace and equanimity, holds more appeal than living to 90 without
 it. As Aristotle said, “The energy of the mind is the essence of life.”
 

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 <figure>
 <img
 decoding="async"
 width="700"
 height="601"
 alt="life-line2"
 
 class="has-img-center lazyload"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/life_line2_99e94c4da1.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-11T12:31:26.963Z"
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 </figure>
 </div>

 
 Millions of people struggle with mental health issues, but sadly very
 few consider mental health treatment because of the stigma attached. The
 embarrassment associated with mental illness persists across cultures.
 If speaking about it remains taboo, the younger generations will also
 continue to suffer in silence. The key is to change the narrative and
 encourage open honest dialogue, empathy, and compassion. We are all
 united in our struggles and, therefore, can only thrive when we support
 and uplift one another.
 

 
 We can start the mental and emotional well-being journey by treating
 ourselves with love and compassion, then spreading that to others. Be
 each other’s lifeline. What is more healing than that?
 

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Lifeline

<h4
 id="h-kalyani-adusumilli-grew-up-in-a-minority-group-in-the-united-states-straddling-cultures-learning-how-to-fit-in-and-later-learning-how-to-accept-the-traditions-of-her-heritage-today-she-is-watching-her-children-going-through-the-same-process-shifting-their-cultural-identity-as-they-head-toward-adulthood-in-the-melting-pot-of-a-multicultural-society">
 KALYANI ADUSUMILLI grew up in a minority
 group in the United States, straddling cultures,
 learning how to fit in, and later learning how to accept the traditions of
 her heritage. Today, she is watching her children going through the same
 process, shifting their cultural identity, as they head toward adulthood
 in the melting pot of a multicultural society.
</h4>

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 Do I consider myself Indian or American? That’s a question Indian-Americans
 commonly grapple with as they try to navigate the two cultures that
 influence and impact their lives. “I’m American, Mom!” or “I don’t like
 Indian food!” are sentiments that I’ve heard frequently from my children.
 There’s my youngest, who once curiously told my sister-in-law, to her
 extreme consternation, “I’m not Indian. I’m half-Mexican and half-American!”
 While I knew that his comment stemmed from the adoration he felt for one of
 my close friends, who is Mexican, and like his surrogate aunt, I felt
 guilty, thinking that I had failed to instill in him a sense of pride for
 his own Indian culture. Then there’s my oldest, who traveled to India twice
 and readily embraced the culture and food as a child, but now avoids Indian
 food like the plague! He’ll squawk about mild spices in the occasional
 curry, and then shrug when I watch him munch on hot Cheetos and Takis. Where
 did I go wrong, I wondered, until I considered my own shifting cultural
 identity, and its gradual progression and transformation from childhood
 through adulthood.



 Born in India and raised there for six years before joining my family in the
 United States, I naturally identified more with my Indian roots, at first.
 Not quite fluent in English and accustomed to a different set of societal
 customs, I had to both learn and unlearn to assimilate into Western culture.
 No longer could I run freely around town barefoot, nor did I see cows and
 goats wandering around everywhere unrestrained. But before long, the Western
 influences took hold of me and I morphed into a fusion of East and West. My
 exposure to the American culture came predominantly from mastery of the
 English language and acculturation, as my parents only spoke English at
 home. They would later regret that when they recognized I could no longer
 speak my native tongue fluently.



 Yet, my parents did ensure that my sister and I learned Hindu traditions and
 regularly participated in the local Indian community. I happily took dance
 lessons in Bharatanatyam, relished our summer trips to India, and ate Indian
 food daily and without complaint as a young girl.


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 By the time I was old enough to care about the opinions of my peers, I
 became self-conscious about my ethnicity. Suddenly, I felt painfully aware
 of the stares that strangers directed at my mother when she wore a sari at
 the grocery store, and even more so if I had to appear in public wearing
 traditional garb. Cringe worthy comments from strangers and friends like,
 “Is that blood on your forehead?” when seeing the red bindi on my forehead,
 or “What tribe are you from?” fueled my self-consciousness and the feeling
 that we might as well have been aliens from another planet.



 Often, my mother opened the windows when she cooked Indian food because of
 the pungent aromas in our house, and I remember my anxiety and embarrassment
 when a young American friend scrunched up her nose, questioning, “What’s
 that smell?” As a minority population, inclusion is paramount. Even to the
 point of surrendering one’s identity.



 After four years of bland cuisine at college, I started craving my mom’s
 flavorful South Indian food. I learned how to cook it myself and joined a
 social networking group for young Indian professionals. I began to truly
 embrace my ethnicity. Through personal growth and an increasing awareness of
 how diversity shapes us, I came to embrace my identity as an Indian-American
 woman and appreciate my rich cultural upbringing.



 And so, when I reflect on my American-born children, who have yet to embrace
 their ethnicity and formulate their identity, I reassure myself that I have
 given them a good foundation and introduction to their Indian heritage.
 Since birth, they have had regular exposure to the Hindu culture whether
 through spending time with grandparents, visiting temples for religious
 occasions, reading folklore, or eating Indian food (even if they don’t
 always relish it). Yet, they have also had exposure to many other cultures
 as well – Japanese, Brazilian, Australian, Mexican, and so on. I’m grateful
 that my son has experienced the Hispanic culture so intimately through my
 friend.


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<img decoding="async" width="424" height="600" alt="" class="lazyload has-img-center"
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<h4 class="text-center">
 Only when they learn to appreciate that we are all
 born different
 from one another 
 in so many beautiful ways, will they truly celebrate diversity
 and their own culture.
</h4>

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 More importantly, I respect that my kids identify primarily as Americans, as
 they were born and raised in this country and have been immersed in American
 society. I have seen my children, nieces and nephews go through similar
 scenarios to those I did as a child. They gleefully ran into their
 grandmother’s outstretched arms as little kids, but as they grew older, I
 watched them squirm uncomfortably seeing her familiar round figure, draped
 in a bold-colored sari, waiting to greet them at the bus stop. While
 saddened at this sign of passing innocence, I understood, knowing that they
 too would navigate the complicated waters of growing up with a mixed
 cultural heritage, and confident that they would also come to proudly own
 their cultural identity, by choice and in their own time. Only when they
 learn to appreciate that we are all born different from one another in so
 many beautiful ways, will they truly celebrate diversity and their own
 culture.



 So, the next time my college-bound son groans, “Oh no, not Indian food!” or
 my youngest declares on St. Patrick’s Day that he’s half-Irish, I’ll smile,
 and patiently continue to watch their cultural journey unfold.


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East meets West

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<h4>
 KALYANI
 ADUSUMILLI shares some tips on leading a balanced life so that our time with others is also more
 harmonious.
</h4>



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The key to living harmoniously is balance. I’m sure you’ve heard the old proverb, “All work and no play makes Jack a
 dull boy,” as it’s stood the test of time. Less known, perhaps, is its counterpart, “All play and no work makes Jack
 a mere toy.” We need to maintain an equilibrium between the different aspects of our life to be balanced. But for
 many of us, that’s easier said than done!&nbsp;



I have a notoriously sweet tooth. Sometimes, the one thing that keeps me from overindulging is my mother’s voice,
 repeating in my head like a broken record, “Do everything in moderation, Kalyani!” Whether I’m limiting screen time
 or junk food with my children, I often spout the same sentiment if not the same words, having recognized the wisdom
 in them. My youngest always laughs in amazement when I tell him that he could go overboard with eating healthy food
 as well! Like eating too many carrots and turning orange!



How to go about leading a balanced lifestyle?



The best place to start is by making a list! Prioritizing can prove challenging. So if everything is laid out right
 in front of you, it’s easier to see how the different pieces of the puzzle fit. Write down what you value and
 determine whether you’re giving it enough attention.



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<h4 class="has-text-align-center">Whether it’s your mind
 or your body, they are deeply connected:
 the other will thrive if you take care of one.</h4>



<hr>



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Since our existence relies on health, I’d say it’s critical, if not the most important! Yet, it’s often something
 people most neglect. It could be because we’re burning the midnight oil, taking care of everyone else and finding no
 time for ourselves, or because self-destructive behavior has become natural to us. Our mental health inevitably
 suffers when we neglect our physical health, whether through lack of proper nutrition, exercise, or sleep. It can be
 the reverse, too, making it a vicious cycle. Whether it’s your mind or your body, they are deeply connected: the
 other will thrive if you take care of one.



<hr class="vertical-space1">


<div class="block-image">
 <figure><img decoding="async" width="600" height="659" alt="" class="has-img-center lazyload"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/the_balancing_act2_36ca475f9d.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-26T07:14:09.048Z">
 </figure>
</div>


<hr class="vertical-space1">



Living optimally has to do with fulfillment and satisfaction, not perfection. Look at your list and set goals that
 align your desire with how you live your life. What are your physical, mental, and emotional needs? Only when you
 incorporate those will you have actual control and ownership of your life.&nbsp;



Part of the balancing act is also learning to compromise. If you have a family, how will you and your partner
 prioritize so that responsibilities are symmetric? An unequal relationship becomes a breeding ground for resentment.




Finally, finding enough time to achieve your goals often means simplifying your life. It’s impossible to devote
 yourself fully to anything if you have too much on your plate. If you want your family to spend more time together,
 try cutting out two hours of everyone’s screen time.&nbsp;



We’re all tightrope walkers in life. When you find your balance, the steadiness within will keep you upright.



<hr class="vertical-space1">



<hr>



<h4 class="has-text-align-center">Illustrations by EMI TSE</h4>



<hr>

The balancing act

<h4>KALYANI ADUSUMILLI shares her personal experiences of remembrance, and the relationship between the past and the present. Through some painful experiences, she has learned how to have a positive focus, and not remain trapped in the past.</h4>Remembrance is a laden word with heavy meaning, carrying such weight in our hearts and minds. Because it signifies memories or recollections, the feelings it elicits can be both painful and pleasing. Typically, remembrance occurs in honor of a loved one or a person of significance after they have passed. Many countries hold Remembrance Day to recognize fallen soldiers for their courage and sacrifice in defending their homeland. Whether observed ceremonially or more privately in thoughts, remembrance allows people to pay their respects. Though sadness often accompanies memories, remembering provides solace by keeping our dear ones with us forever in our hearts and minds. Sharing memories with others is an essential source of strength and unites us in grief. When I write of remembrance, I instinctively think of my beloved sister, who died tragically in a car accident in her mid-thirties. Commemoration of the anniversary of her death started as a day shrouded in grief and mourning as the gaping wound in my heart remained fresh and raw. But with the passage of time and healing, I stopped focusing solely on the loss. Instead, I began to draw comfort from the abundance of happy memories I was fortunate enough to have had with my sister. And on her birthday, I make a point to celebrate her beautiful spirit and everything she loved, right down to her favorite chocolate cake! Whereas previously I’d thought only of my sorrow at her absence in my life and that of my children’s, I remembered that she remained a part of my sons and me and that I could still draw strength from everything she’d given me, including her unfailing confidence in me. None of that died with her. I’d been so focused on my boys not having the benefit of their aunt in their lives that I’d neglected to consider that I could fill theirs with the same joy and exuberance she’d brought to mine. Now, I’ve reached a point where I reflect peacefully on our time together and trust in the immortality of her main legacy, unconditional love. Of course, remembrance doesn’t always pertain to death. Sometimes, it’s simply reminiscing about a past event or a powerful impression left on our minds. My fond recollections of my children’s milestones or my former travel adventures also constitute remembrance. And as we age, the tendency to balk at change and reminisce about “the good old days” (for me, that’s the 80s and 90s!) rises exponentially.&nbsp; Naturally, not all remembrances are agreeable. When we recall an unpleasant experience, it’s easy to succumb to the negative emotions it draws forth, especially when it forces us to relive the trauma. Yet even the distressing events have a purpose, providing an opportunity to grow and learn from them. Remembrance of past atrocities, such as slavery and genocide, serves as a warning so that future generations avoid repeating the same mistakes. Historical reminders in those instances can prompt healing and forgiveness.&nbsp;<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">Understanding the past also helps us to discover our purpose and reach our full potential.&nbsp;</h4><hr>Understanding the past also helps us to discover our purpose and reach our full potential. Ultimately, the power of remembrance lies in giving the past its due by recognizing its continuing impact, while remaining tethered in the present.<hr>Illustration by JASMEE MUDGAL<hr>

Remembrance

Karen is a project manager for the city of Reykjavik in the field of climate change and European cooperation, adopting international standards in the city’s progress towards a more sustainable future.

KAREN-EYTHORSDOTTIR.jpg

Karen Eyþórsdóttir

<h4
 id="h-karen-ey-rsd-ttir-works-for-the-city-of-reykjavik-in-the-field-of-climate-change-and-european-cooperation-adopting-international-standards-in-the-city-s-progress-towards-a-more-sustainable-future-here-she-is-interviewed-by-madeleine-olive-about-her-work-qualities-of-a-leader-and-how-meditation-helps-her-in-day-to-day-life"
 >
 KAREN EYÞÓRSDÓTTIR works for the city of Reykjavik in the field of climate change and
 European cooperation, adopting international standards in the city’s
 progress towards a more sustainable future. Here she is interviewed by
 MADELEINE OLIVE
 about her work, qualities of a leader, and how meditation helps her in
 day-to-day life.
 </h4>

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 
 Q: Thank you so much for being here with us. Can you share the story
 of your life in Iceland?
 

 
 KE:
 Icelanders are global champions when it comes to women’s rights,
 although we can always do better. I grew up in a society where I was
 allowed to believe I could be anyone, and work in any field. As I began
 to form my own opinions of the world, I developed a strong sense of
 justice and curiosity, and engaged in diverse student activities at
 college. I was the youngest board member of the Student Association and
 the following year I became the president.
 

 
 My interests ranged from Icelandic opera to writing for the school
 paper, and I loved to get involved in events that supported human
 rights. I started to see that there is still a lot of injustice toward
 women, so my initial step was into women’s rights, for students and
 teachers, and improving teachers’ salaries. As cliched as it may sound,
 I always wanted to improve the world, to leave it better than when I
 came to it.
 

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <div class="block-image">
 <figure>
 <img
 alt="Mynd-1-utskriftargrein"
 class="lazyload has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/Mynd_1_utskriftargrein_700x466_1319e4a734.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-12T06:48:42.782Z"
 />
 </figure>
 </div>

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 
 As an Icelandic girl, I was able to pursue the education I wished on a
 global scale, although here there is still a class division, and there
 are a lot of missed opportunities because of that. In junior college, I
 became interested in meditation, and was involved with the Brahma
 Kumaris. Then I went to Taiwan to learn meditation in a Buddhist
 monastery, and I traveled the world for a bit. I moved to London, and
 the fast tempo of working in the financial industry was a maturing but
 difficult experience. Then I moved to Copenhagen to study business. I
 wanted to learn how to change the system from within.
 

 
 I had done a lot of activist work before that, and I was tired of being
 angry and standing outside with a billboard shouting. I do believe in
 activism, and I still do it. I strongly encourage young people to engage
 in it, because I saw a study that showed that if only 3.5% of a
 community come together and ask for change, there is a very high
 probability that the change will happen. But when it came to choosing my
 field of study, I chose business because I love organizing, and I wanted
 to change things from within.
 

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <hr />

 <h4 class="has-text-align-center">
 I saw a study that showed that if only 3.5% of a community come
 together and ask for change, there is a very high probability
 that the change will happen.
 
 </h4>

 <hr />

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 
 Q: Tell us about your work for the city of Reykjavik.
 

 
 KE: I
 gather data on sustainability indicators and work with matters relating
 to climate change. I also work on European cooperation, as we want to
 learn from other cities. My team wrote an application in January 2022 to
 be a part of the “100 Climate-neutral and Smart Cities” initiative,
 which is a Horizon Europe project run by the European Union and the
 European Commission. We applied and were chosen to be one of the 112
 European cities to be front runners to reach carbon neutrality by 2030.
 

 
 The national goal of Iceland is to be climate neutral by 2040, and the
 government has its own strategies and regulations around that, but the
 city of Reykjavik is going to try to be climate neutral by 2030. To do
 that we need a lot of support. My task in the coming months is to map
 out the stakeholders, engage with organizations and citizens, and create
 climate city contracts. These contracts will focus on how we are going
 to reach this target. I will do my best to make sure our city reaches
 its target.
 

 
 Q: What are some other cities involved in this project?
 

 
 KE: There
 is Malmo in Sweden, Madrid, Krakow, Mannheim, Helsinki, Copenhagen, and
 many more. If you Google “100 Climate-neutral and Smart Cities by 2030”
 you will see the list. There are 100 EU cities and another 12 associated
 cities like us, as Iceland is an associated country.
 

 
 Q: How do you involve young people in your programs?
 

 
 KE: For
 this sort of project, the city really wants to engage citizens, and
 young people are a very important part of that. How we will engage them
 is yet to be worked out, but we are trying things. For example, we have
 a Climathon, where we encourage young people to form teams and find
 solutions to societal problems using innovation and creative ideas. And
 there’s a portal for applications for annual grants, so that young
 people can apply for grants if they want to start their own company or
 go into project management. You can go to reykjavik.is or reykjavik.com
 and learn more about young citizens’ engagement in various programs.
 

 
 Q: Can you describe the qualities you admire in a good leader?
 

 
 KE: The
 best leaders are not the ones who go after leadership roles, but who are
 leaders in their own environment, maybe without even knowing it. They
 can also be leaders in their family, in their friends’ group, in the
 house where they live, or in their community.
 

 
 A good leader aspires to inspire and to draw out the best in others.
 Instead of being solely driven by ego (although ego can be a good
 leadership quality), a good leader is driven by love, by wanting to
 create something good, wanting to improve the lives of others, and
 wanting to create solutions that will make something better. They are
 humble and want to work with people, rather than having people
 work under them. Everyone pulls the wagon together. A leader is simply
 the one who manages the process and sees the good qualities in each and
 every person, and creates a platform or an opportunity for each person
 to use their best qualities. A good leader does that with encouragement,
 rather than giving orders.
 

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <hr />

 <h4 class="has-text-align-center">
 A good leader is driven by love, by wanting to create something
 good, wanting to improve the lives of others, and wanting
 to create solutions that will make something better.
 
 </h4>

 <hr />

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 
 A good leader is very human, admitting mistakes, and encouraging others
 to admit mistakes. I’ve recently changed positions, and in the new team
 we start each meeting with a round of asking how we’re feeling today,
 where we’re coming from today. It’s great because if you say, “I’m in a
 bad mood,” or “I’ve had a bad morning,” people understand and won’t take
 it personally or believe it’s their fault. It gives them space. Our
 supervisor also does it, and I think it’s admirable.
 

 
 Q: Where do you learn that skill? Do they teach it in business
 school?
 

 
 KE: In
 business school, there is leadership training and theory, but it’s not
 always in this direction. We are taught the theory behind successful
 leaders, and we read cases about leaders who walk the talk, and treat
 everyone the same, and so forth, but you also have to learn by doing,
 and by watching leaders around you, and leaders you look up to, and
 asking, “What qualities does this person have, and why do I look up to
 them? Why are they a leader to me?”
 

 
 You can also attend self-improvement courses and life-skills courses,
 watch TED talks, listen to podcasts, become aware, and ask yourself, “Am
 I a leader? Do I want to be a leader?”
 

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <div class="block-image">
 <figure>
 <img
 alt="Changing-the-system-from-within3"
 class="lazyload has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/Changing_the_system_from_within3_7f0a657951.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-12T06:49:33.944Z"
 />
 </figure>
 </div>

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 
 Q: It’s inspiring and it helps you to grow.
 

 
 KE: Yes,
 it’s a great point! A leader wants others to grow, wants people to
 succeed them. That’s a really great quality.
 

 
 Q: You used the word “love.” Do you learn to love in business school?
 It’s a core attitude or way of being. I don’t think you can learn that
 in business school.
 

 
 KE: I
 totally understand your point. People often say that we should be
 learning these human qualities in school, but I don’t think we have to
 learn everything in our institutions. If we want to see a change in the
 world, a change in human behavior, we have to be that change,
 and educate the children and adolescents around us. I don’t think we can
 put the responsibility of teaching human goodness on institutions. It’s
 the love of people, the self-sacrifice and devotion, that shows us.
 

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <hr />

 <h4 class="has-text-align-center">
 If we want to see a change in the world, a change in human
 behavior, we have to be that change, and educate the
 children and adolescents around us.
 
 </h4>

 <hr />

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 
 Q: You mentioned meditation. Are you still meditating? And does it
 help you in your work to arrive at something? Sometimes we have ideas
 like, “I would like to lead by love,” etc., but how do we arrive at
 this? Is meditation a useful tool in your work?
 

 
 KE:
 Absolutely. It has helped me tremendously to have stepped into the world
 of meditation over the years, and I always wish I did it every morning,
 but I don’t always give myself the time. Meditation is not something you
 can read about; it’s something you have to practice for yourself. Having
 practiced over the years, I feel like it helps me every day. If I am
 stressed out, I do a breathing technique. If I am going into a big
 meeting, I often go into a quiet room, put on my headphones, go into a
 meditation app, and press 1-minute meditation so I can relax and be
 present before the meeting. It has really helped me stay present.
 

 
 It’s also a tool to work with people, because I often have to deal with
 many different personalities. People might be having a bad day or
 feeling negative about something, and having love in my mind and
 unconditional love for coworkers really helps. I couldn’t recommend it
 more. There’s never a downside to meditation.
 

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <hr />

 <h4 class="has-text-align-center">
 Meditation is not something you can read about; it’s something
 you have to practice for yourself. Having practiced over the
 years, I feel like it helps me every day.
 
 </h4>

 <hr />

Changing the system from within

<h4 class=""
 id="h-karen-ey-rsd-ttir-works-for-the-city-of-reykjavik-in-the-field-of-climate-change-and-european-cooperation-adopting-international-standards-in-the-city-s-progress-towards-a-more-sustainable-future-here-she-is-interviewed-by-madeleine-olive-about-the-sustainable-reykjavik-of-the-future-and-the-importance-of-togetherness">
 KAREN
 EYÞÓRSDÓTTIR
 works for the city of Reykjavik in the field of climate change and European
 cooperation, adopting international standards in the city’s progress towards
 a more sustainable future. Here she is interviewed by
 MADELEINE OLIVE
 about the sustainable Reykjavik of the future and the importance of
 togetherness.
</h4>

<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<h4>
 A Sustainable
 Future
</h4>


 Q: What is your vision for
 Reykjavik as a sustainable city of the
 future?



 KE: After Covid,
 Reykjavik created something called the Green Plan. It’s an
 outreach program based on the city’s vision for a sustainable environment,
 outlining funding and green spaces for the next 10 years.



 There’s a lot of emphasis on green transport, infrastructure, neighborhoods,
 and innovation in green jobs. The Green Plan aims to create a better city to
 live in, and incorporates the three pillars of sustainability – economic,
 social, and environmental – to ultimately create an environment-friendly city.
 And this Green Plan is very much in line with the 100 climate-neutral and
 smart cities program. That’s our vision.



 Q: Did growing up with
 nature all around you educate you about the
 environment?



 KE: In Iceland we
 grow up in close proximity to nature, and many of us live by
 the sea. If you drive out of the city for half an hour, you experience
 untouched nature, which is such a privilege. And as you grow older, you
 appreciate it more and more. I wouldn’t say that Icelanders are more
 respectful of nature than other people. We spend a lot of time in the city and
 go to the countryside once in a while, but not many people really go out on a
 hike in nature or go up to the highlands.



 Iceland is rich in natural resources, like hydropower and wind power. We use
 hydropower to generate electricity, and we use geothermal energy – where hot
 water is pumped from the ground – to heat the houses. But there is an
 ever-increasing need for electricity. A recent report said that to achieve
 carbon neutrality by 2040, we need to dam our rivers to generate hydroelectric
 power. Another report stated that we need to build five more dams to harness
 this amount of energy.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<hr />

<h4 class="has-text-align-center">
 The Green Plan aims to
 create a better city to live in, and
 incorporates the three pillars of sustainability –economic, social,
 and environmental – to ultimately create an environment-friendly
 city.
</h4>

<hr />

<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<div>
 <figure>
 <img decoding="async" width="600" height="811" alt="" class="lazyload mx-auto d-block has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/creating_green_city2a_a89d6f8756.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-13T02:15:54.728Z" />
 </figure>
</div>

<hr class="vertical-space1" />


 But that would mean flooding entire valleys and their ecosystems, flora, and
 wildlife, which I think is a big shame because Iceland has one of the most
 untouched highlands. There aren’t many places like it, at least in Europe. We
 really do need to protect these areas. There are all too many people willing
 to sacrifice them in order to create more dams to sell more cheap energy to
 the industry.



 I guess living in close proximity to nature does makes you feel more connected
 to it, but I think we can protect it better. You will protect something that
 you love.


<h4>
 Young
 Leaders
</h4>


 Q: Would you like to share
 something on how to empower and encourage young
 people to become leaders?



 KE: My primary
 advice to young people is to nurture yourself, because you have
 to put the oxygen mask on first before you can assist others. And after you
 have nurtured yourself and found your own strengths, find the field of study
 or area of work you want to engage in. Then, I encourage you to get involved
 in any way possible.



 Often, we feel that our voices are not heard, or that we are not invited to
 have a seat at the table. But in my experience, there are a lot more
 opportunities than we think. For instance, you can be a mentor at your
 university, helping students find their feet and guiding them. You can be a
 volunteer with the UN. You can volunteer, like you are doing with the
 Heartfulness Magazine.



 I was a deputy delegate to the UN on sustainable development, but then came
 Covid. So, I didn’t get to do nearly as much as I wanted to. Now Covid is
 lifting. There are multiple ways to volunteer, and if you don’t have time, you
 can be a leader within your environment. But it really all starts with
 nurturing yourself first, finding self-acceptance, self-love. Find your
 strengths and work on them, and then you can start assisting others. It always
 has to come from love. Any kind of activity or decision is so much more
 powerful if it comes from love rather than fear.



 Don’t engage with climate change solely out of fear; do it out of love for the
 future generations. Young people are so powerful. Look out for grants. Very
 often there are grants from municipalities, innovation companies or
 institutions, student associations, etc. Go with your idea and believe in it.



 Then, try to inspire others and be open to the world. Travel, get to know
 other people, be open to other cultures and other ways of seeing things, new
 perspectives. My main message is to embrace openness and inspiration.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<div>
 <figure>
 <img decoding="async" width="600" height="811" alt="" class="lazyload mx-auto d-block has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/creating_green_city3a_1253aa0558.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-13T02:18:00.963Z" />
 </figure>
</div>

<hr class="vertical-space1" />


 Q: I am realizing more and
 more the power of togetherness. Thank you very
 much for sharing your thoughts.



 KE: Thank you!

Creating a green city

Karen O'Neill

<h4>Has something ever happened to you seemingly out of the blue? Are such random incidents related, if at all? KAREN O’ NEILL muses on our connection with each other and with the Universe.</h4>Maybe you are thinking of an old friend who coincidentally calls you, or you unexpectedly bump into an acquaintance. A song keeps playing wherever you go, or a sequence of numbers continuously crops up everywhere you look. Later when another seemingly random event occurs, suddenly the mismatched pieces of the puzzle of your life fall into place and, in that moment, the full picture comes into focus. It seems as if the Universe has illuminated the path from behind you, pointing you towards the future.We may all have had such experiences. In those moments the separateness of the parts of our lives, boxed into the predictable and the ordinary, is suddenly turned upside down. The mysterious working of the Universe is briefly exposed to us, and we marvel at how our destinies made up of random and disparate events can be so subtly intertwined. This is called synchronicity.Steve Jobs said, “You can’t connect the dots looking forward, you can only connect them looking backwards.” Sequences of chance encounters and events, and of symbols that may seem mundane, can find meaning if only we expand our awareness to distil the method from the madness. The Universe has strewn daisy chains of its workings for us to stumble across, if only we open our eyes to what is under our feet.<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">The mysterious working of the Universe is briefly exposed to us, and we marvel at how our destinies made up of random and disparate events can be so subtly intertwined. This is called synchronicity.</h4><hr>In 2015, I made the decision to move to India. A couple of months before I left, a woman I knew gifted me some crystals. I cannot say that I was hugely enamored of the crystals at the time. One was rose quartz in the shape of a heart. I tried to refuse, but she insisted. “Take it,” she said, “you’ll be needing it soon.” Puzzled, I packed it among my belongings.Some months later I came across Heartfulness Meditation. These seemingly unconnected events signaled to me that something had been set in motion from the moment that she had gifted me the heart to the moment I meditated on the heart.So the next time you have a eureka moment, when things fall into place, when the dots connect and you realize that they form the outline of a beautiful galaxy, take a moment. Cherish it. It is a sign that you are on the right path.&nbsp;

Connecting the dots

Karisham is a passionate and detail-oriented 21-year-old design student from South Africa. She is currently perfecting her craft and preparing to start a business. She is also an environmental activist, who is raising money with her brother to create a Heartfulness Forest in South Africa.

Karisham-Kara.jpg

Karisham Kara

<h4>
 A common piece of advice is, “Don’t let your happiness depend on
 others.”
 KARISHAM KARA, a college student in South Africa,
 recognizes that as much as we
 strive to be independent we are inevitably interconnected and need one
 another to thrive and survive.
 
</h4>

<h4>
 She offers 8 tips to be happy while balancing independence and
 interdependence.
</h4>

<hr class="vertical-space1" />


 I always thought I’d feel more settled in myself and less reliant on
 others as I grew up. In the last few years, however, I have realized how
 interconnected the world is. Nature has so intricately organized herself
 into a system where everything relies on everything else to grow. No
 plant grows in a vacuum without external aid. The earthworms are needed
 to break down matter and create nutrient-dense soil, and the bees are
 needed to pollinate flowers to create seeds. In the same way, we rely on
 businesses to employ us or on customers to sustain our businesses.
 Nothing escapes the webbed arrangement of nature.



 So, when I hear the advice “Never let your happiness depend on others,”
 or “Happiness should come from within,” or “Don’t expect anything from
 anyone,” I feel baffled, because the actions of others do make
 us unhappy sometimes, and they do affect our quality of life.
 No matter how hard we try to be self-reliant, at the end of the day we
 live in a community, and we have to lean on others at times. It feels
 unjust to pin the reason for our unhappiness on ourselves when we are
 not the reason for it, and when we are trying our best to take
 everything positively and grow. Often we feel stuck because of something
 that someone else said or did to us.



 So, I’ve been pondering how to create our own happiness in an
 interconnected world. I’m nowhere near understanding all the answers,
 but my dad likes to say that nobody has the whole puzzle, we just have
 the pieces.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

Here are my 8 tips to being happy:

<h4>
 1. Judge the level of control you have over a
 situation
</h4>

<div class="block-image">
 <figure>
 <img decoding="async" alt="8tips_happiness2" width="153" height="153"
 class="lazyload img-float-left has-img-center-in-mobile"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/8tips_happiness2_250x250_a20bafd7f3.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-10T10:30:33.971Z" />
 </figure>
</div>


 Let’s take a scenario: You and your co-workers like to celebrate
 together after a project ends. While you enjoy the celebrations, you are
 frustrated because you are doing all the work to plan these
 celebrations. Everyone is having fun, but no one recognizes your efforts
 after finishing a tiring project, which leaves you feeling drained and
 resentful.



 First, analyze the problem. How many people does it affect, and how much
 influence and control do you have? In this case, you have control over
 being able to express your frustrations and asking for help. What stops
 you? Often it is fear.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<h4>
 2. Happiness comes from within when you eliminate
 fear
</h4>

<div class="block-image">
 <figure>
 <img decoding="async" alt="" width="165" class="lazyload img-float-right has-img-center-in-mobile"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/8tips_happiness3_250x250_b9eb8b96ac.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-10T10:34:19.943Z" />
 </figure>
</div>


 There are endless reasons you may not say what you are feeling, but the
 root cause is almost always fear. &nbsp;



 Step one is to honor and accept your feelings. Be aware of what you’re
 going through, and allow yourself to feel it without guilt. Realize that
 you have the right to be responsible for your actions, make mistakes, be
 yourself, be treated with respect, say no, and express your feelings.
 Also, remember that everyone else has these rights, too.



 Step two is to equip yourself with the skills to communicate your
 thoughts and feelings effectively, so that problems can be solved
 creatively and collaboratively.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<h4>
 3. Understand that event + reaction =
 outcome
</h4>


 Any outcome is reliant upon your reaction or response. To reach the
 desired outcome, your reactions will ideally come from listening to the
 heart. When you learn how to do this, you will not react, and you will
 know how to stand up for yourself.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<h4>
 4. Communicating effectively: mindset
 shift
</h4>

<div class="block-image">
 <figure>
 <img decoding="async" alt="8tips_happiness4" width="211" height="211"
 class="lazyload img-float-left has-img-center-in-mobile"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/8tips_happiness4_250x250_8c15c3c9df.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-10T10:35:59.630Z" />
 </figure>
</div>


 In this scenario, you may have kept your feelings to yourself. Then
 after resentment has built up, you may have exploded and said something
 like, “I spend so much time and effort planning these trips, and you all
 enjoy them without giving a second thought to whether you can do the
 same for me!”



 The first step is to create a mindset shift. Rather than thinking no one
 cares about you, and assigning blame and guilt, try to communicate your
 needs to your friends. Then you will be solving the problem
 with your friends. Note the distinction: you’re not fighting
 against your friends, but with them against the
 problem. This important distinction helps you connect with your friends,
 so they will be less defensive and more collaborative.



 We’ve all been there. When we do say things we’ve been itching
 to say, as resentment builds up, it doesn’t offer any relief. Instead,
 we feel more guilty – it leaves a bad feeling in the air. If you’ve made
 it to this point, you’ve likely spent so much time in resentment that
 you’ve lost sight of why it all started. All your attention has gone
 into convincing yourself why the other is a horrible person. So, this
 next step may require a bit of back-tracking.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<div class="block-image">
 <figure>
 <img decoding="async" alt="8tips-happiness5-250x250" width="163" height="163"
 class="lazyload img-float-right has-img-center-in-mobile"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/8tips_happiness5_250x250_8ebd60a0b2.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-10T10:37:46.219Z" />
 </figure>
</div>

<h4>
 5. Communicating effectively: clearly identifying the
 need
</h4>


 It’s important to clarify your initial needs. In this scenario, perhaps
 what you really felt was that everyone was having fun, and you didn’t
 have the freedom to relax with the responsibility of preparing and
 hosting, which also felt lonely at times.



 Once this need has been identified, it can be clearly communicated to
 your friends. Note how no blame is assigned, as this is all about
 conveying your feelings. It gives an opportunity for your friends to
 step up and collaborate on a solution.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<h4>
 6. Communicating effectively: vehicle versus
 value
</h4>

<div class="block-image">
 <figure>
 <img decoding="async" alt="8tips-happiness6-250x250" width="161" height="161"
 class="lazyload img-float-left has-img-center-in-mobile"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/8tips_happiness6_250x250_a889939691.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-10T10:39:33.100Z" />
 </figure>
</div>


 Often, we are focused on how we’d like the problem to be
 solved, and we lose sight of identifying the problem. It might feel
 counter-intuitive, but if you keep sight of your values, and the needs
 to be met, you will be happier and more effective in solving the
 problem. You will be focused on the value, not the vehicle.



 In this scenario, rather than insisting that everyone acknowledges and
 praises you for the planning, and is considerate enough to help with the
 following events (this is a vehicle), stay focused on your need to be
 part of the fun rather than overwhelmed by the responsibility (this is a
 value).



 When speaking to your friends, you could say, “When I am consistently
 left to plan our celebratory outings, I start to feel like I am
 responsible for everyone’s enjoyment. What I’d like is to have an equal
 chance to relax and unwind, and to feel like even the planning of these
 events is a fun, bonding experience.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<h4>
 7. Find the solution
</h4>

<div class="block-image">
 <figure>
 <img decoding="async" alt="8tips-happiness7-250x250" width="175" height="175"
 class="lazyload img-float-right has-img-center-in-mobile"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/8tips_happiness7_250x250_a72f0398de.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-10T10:40:50.712Z" />
 </figure>
</div>


 Once you understand your feelings and needs, and can successfully convey
 them, it will be easier to find a solution that works well for everyone,
 especially the people most in need.



 A straightforward solution would be that everyone takes a turn to plan a
 celebration, but there are many other creative ways to stop you feeling
 overwhelmed with responsibility. Sometimes the smallest things can
 change the dynamic of the group.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<div class="block-image">
 <figure>
 <img decoding="async" alt="8tips-happiness8-250x250" width="160" height="160"
 class="lazyload img-float-left has-img-center-in-mobile"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/8tips_happiness8_250x250_9cd092574c.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-10T10:42:53.202Z" />
 </figure>
</div>

<h4>
 8. Expectation versus invitation
</h4>


 This is where the distinction between expectation and invitation comes.
 Expecting your friends to take the initiative to help without clearly
 communicating your needs, and then getting progressively resentful and
 angry, means that no one gets their needs met.



 In contrast, the method I have outlined is active and allows all of you
 to understand yourselves, communicate, then collaboratively work on
 solutions. It requires you all to try to find solutions that work best
 for everyone.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<hr />

<h4 class="has-text-align-center">
 Sometimes the smallest things can change the dynamic of
 the
 group.
</h4>

<hr />

<hr class="vertical-space1" />


 While others influence our lives, we always have some level of control.
 We can stand up for ourselves and make ourselves happy, while trying our
 best to do so in a way that doesn’t aggravate others. While there is no
 point expecting others to change, we can actively and clearly voice our
 needs as an invitation for collaborative problem solving. In doing so,
 we give space for everyone to show up as they are, which will only
 strengthen our state of interconnectedness.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<hr />

<h4 class="has-text-align-center">Illustrations by JASMEE MUDGAL</h4>

<hr />

Happiness in an interconnected world

<hr class="vertical-space1">
<h3 style="text-align: center;">GENERATION NOW</h3>
<hr class="vertical-space1">
I was fourteen when my mother left me at boarding school in India. I’m from South Africa and I was so far away from home. I made friends, and school was fun, but one of the things I missed most about home was my mom’s cooking. Not because hostel food was bad (I actually enjoyed it), but because there is something magical and comforting about your mom’s food that you tend to miss when you’re so far from home. I don’t know if I expressed this to my friends, but one day a friend of mine offered me her lunch that her mom had made for her.
“What are you going to eat then?” I asked. 
She just smiled, shrugged and said, “Don’t worry.”
I spent two years with this friend at school, and almost every day she would hand me her lunchbox, and go to the school dining hall for her own lunch (which, might I add, was a difficult task because she wasn’t really allowed to be eating there). She didn’t have to give me her lunch, especially because I had nothing to offer her in return. Her mom’s food was too divine to be giving up, but she always did.
This memory got me thinking about the role that food, generosity, and bonding all have in our lives. Do we feel like offering food to someone we don’t like? No, right? How about when we have a crush on someone? We usually ask them out to come and eat with us. In times of crisis, the constant that most of us have in our lives is having dinner with the family, be it at the same table or over video call. When we love someone, we always ask, “Have you eaten?” So, in my mind, the ultimate form of generosity is sharing food, because food is what we all bond over.
So how can we cultivate a generous heart? Start by bonding with someone you don’t like over food. Open your heart and share what you have. You’ll see the bond form so fast and your own heart will grow. I speak from experience, because when I think back to this time in school, the strongest bonds I created were with those people with whom I shared food. Sharing food is an act of the heart, especially when you’re in a hostel and you have the urge to save all the yummy things to snack on at night when everyone is sleeping! But in our hostel, that’s not how it worked. We all opened up and generously shared what we had. In the process, we opened our hearts more and became generous in other ways in our relationships. It was a gateway to accepting people the way they are: listening to their stories, viewpoints, and hardships; laughing and crying with them; and truly understanding them, their needs, wants and dreams.
If this were the mentality in our everyday world, imagine how much closer we’d all be! In today’s world there is such a lack of vulnerability and openness in our relationships. We don’t communicate properly and enough. Generosity of the heart is that key to better connections, and sharing food is one key to becoming more generous.
<hr class="vertical-space1">

<hr>
<h4 style="text-align: center;">Article by KARISHAM KARA</h4>

<hr>

The key to better connections

Karishma is an author, speaker, entrepreneur, and wellness coach. She is a licensed Heartmath™ Resilience Trainer, Certified Breathwork Instructor, Meditation Trainer, and a practitioner of Heartfulness for over 2 decades.

Through her company, Breathe Your Vision, she offers coaching programs to optimize the transformation journey, so people can consistently perform at their peak, avoid burnout, and tap into their potential using proven resilience building tools, breathwork, and other high efficiency methods. 

karishma-desai-web.jpg

Karishma Desai

<hr class="vertical-space1" />
<h4>
 KARISHMA DESAI shares her journey from
 plant-killer to having green friends. Through childlike wonder and simply
 taking a moment to hug and connect with trees, she experiences the healing
 energy of nature, as well as enhancing the connection to her inner nature
 through the heart.
</h4>
<hr class="vertical-space1" />

 I am embarrassed to confess that I have been a plant-killer in the past. On
 the odd occasion that friends would gift me a plant, I would fail to keep it
 alive for long. Not knowing how to care for them, they would invariably
 perish. Most of my friends and colleagues were intrigued by how someone who
 loves animals could be so naïve and ignorant about taking care of something as
 simple as a plant. The truth is I never took interest or paid much attention
 to them.


 A few years ago, when my little girl started school, some of the parents in
 our estate decided to form a walking school bus. Two rostered parent
 volunteers would walk a group of ten to twelve young kids to school and back
 each day. This was a great experience, as on the 15-minute walk to school we
 witnessed their beautiful innocent and playful banter. As they became more
 familiar, it was not uncommon for them to prefer to be only with their close
 friends and argue with the others. Often, they would be too loud and disturb
 the otherwise quiet neighborhood we walked through.


 One morning, I noticed a few adamant kids wanting to have it their own way, so
 I decided to divert their attention. I asked them to observe the surroundings,
 and to reflect on how to appreciate the beauty of nature. Pointing to one of
 the trees, I explained that they are full of life just like us, and they react
 to love and care. The children looked amused, so to overcome their hesitation
 I suggested we name the trees on the way to school. I’m not sure how I came up
 with this suggestion, but my daughter and her friends giggled as they named
 each tree and started to greet them with love.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />
<img decoding="async" alt="greenfriends2" class="has-img-center lazyload"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/greenfriends2_c437cff723.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-08T06:51:33.138Z" />
&nbsp;
<hr class="vertical-space1" />


<hr />

<h5 style="text-align: center">
 My eyes closed naturally as I hugged the tree.
 
 Generally, I do this when I pray or 
 meditate or hug my loved ones. 
 It is an instinct that connects me deeper 
 to the core of my existence – the heart. 
 I was intrigued that hugging the tree 
 had the same effect on me. 
</h5>

<hr />

<hr class="vertical-space1" />

 Every time the kids were noisy on these walks, I would remind them to tune
 into the beauty of nature around us, and they would say hello to the trees.
 Some of the kids were uncomfortable with the idea and did not participate, but
 I could see it lit a spark in others. I remember one morning when a child
 asked me if she could touch a tree to feel it. I must have had a strong shot
 of coffee that morning, as I went overboard and suggested to the kids, “Forget
 about touching, try hugging them like this!” The giggles never stopped, and
 the look of my fellow parent volunteer made me feel a bit guilty about
 teaching the kids something a little unusual.


 I must admit that something changed in me after that casual hug. My eyes
 closed naturally as I hugged the tree. Generally, I do this when I pray or
 meditate or hug my loved ones. It is an instinct that connects me deeper to
 the core of my existence – the heart. I was intrigued that hugging the tree
 had the same effect on me. I realized the magnificence of these beautiful tall
 trees; I felt their calming essence on my heart and soul. Hesitantly, I
 allowed myself to explore this new experience and helplessly found my
 connection getting deeper and deeper. I had found my first green friend.


 Our dear Mother Earth has healing energies. Trees are rooted deep within her,
 so it is not a wonder that, when we touch them, they may pass on this energy
 to help us heal. Spending just a little time in their company is therapeutic
 for me. As a breathing coach, I have noticed how easy it is for me to breathe
 when I sit close to a tree. If I spend just a few mindful minutes in their
 presence it restores my natural breathing pattern, so I feel as fresh as a
 flower.


 Nowadays, when I sit under a tree sipping my mug of coffee, I remember to
 express my gratitude for its generosity to many forms of life. I observe how
 it never judges who comes to it – birds, insects, animals, wind, humans are
 all equal recipients of its magnanimity. I am inspired by how it consumes far
 less than it contributes. I observe how it is just a witness to the entire
 process of life around it. These tall trees are in touch with the Earth as
 much as they are peering up to the high skies. We too can touch the skies by
 remaining deeply connected and grounded in our inner Nature.


 I feel that when we approach and interact with nature with an open heart like
 that of a child, we can seamlessly allow ourselves to connect not just with
 our external nature but also with our true inner Nature. My many green friends
 have certainly helped me experience this magic.


 As for houseplants, I now have many, and all of them are thriving with the
 food, water sunshine, love and care that I shower on them.


 So what are you waiting for? Find your new green friend!


<hr class="vertical-space1" />
<img decoding="async" alt="greenfriends2" class="lazyload has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/green_friends_img1_35a71ea866.jpg" />
<hr class="vertical-space1" />


<hr />

<h4 style="text-align: center">
 Article by KARISHMA DESAI Illustrations by ARATI SHEDDE
</h4>

<hr />

Green friends

<hr class="vertical-space1">
<h4>As a young mother in Sydney, Australia, KARISHMA DESAI was diagnosed with a serious illness and went through life-saving surgery. Here she shares how this changed her attitude toward life and her appreciation of the simple daily things she previously took for granted. </h4>
<hr class="vertical-space1">
A few years ago, I had to unexpectedly undergo a serious surgery. My life changed completely during the recovery process. I realised how much I had taken everything for granted. I valued the first time I was able to get up by myself from my bed. The first time in days being able to walk up to the bathroom without support was like a blessing. I started to be grateful for even the slightest reduction in pain. I started appreciating having my loved ones around me more now. Each day and each moment towards my recovery filled my heart and soul with immense gratitude.
It is a shame that I had to lose it all to feel this gratitude in what I always had. But it surely brought a renewed appreciation for all the mundane things, events and persons in my life now. 
There is something magical about cultivating gratitude in our lives. It connected me with the present moment as each moment became a blessing for me. I stopped complaining about little things and in really low times I reminded myself of this gift of life I had. I honestly found the joy back in the littlest of things. The quality of my life is so much more refined just by cultivating this attitude. 
I find myself in this joyful, content, positive and peaceful space more than ever.
Gratitude is more than indebtedness. When you feel indebted there is a desperation to return the favour. But in gratitude you know that no matter how much you try, you cannot even out the deal. So, we do not maintain the account. In gratitude you feel positivity, contentment, peace and thankfulness and that transforms everything. With the attitude of gratitude even the smallest things in life give you joy.
And what fascinates me about this development of gratitude is that even though it starts out by being thankful to all that you have in life, it eventually leads one to being grateful to the One who gave you all.
It is therefore not a wonder for me to often read about research which concludes that people with the attitude of gratitude are happier beings in general.
Below are some of the things that helped me cultivate the attitude of gratitude:
<img alt="prayer" width="200" height="200" class="has-img-center lazyload" src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/prayer_img_1_35173c5f58.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-10T04:55:49.321Z">Bedtime conversation with yourself, also known as prayer, 
expressing your heartfelt gratitude to the Source of your life.
<img alt="diary" width="200" height="200" class="has-img-center lazyload" src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/diary_img_0c656ce8ff.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-10T04:55:49.332Z">Maintain a diary or gratitude journal and fill it up 
with all the positive things in your life that you are grateful for.
<img alt="hug" width="200" height="200" class="has-img-center lazyload" src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/hug_img_64c7975134.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-10T04:55:49.315Z">Give a hug to your dear ones or simply tell them 
how lucky you are to have them in your life.
<img alt="service" width="200" height="200" class="has-img-center lazyload" src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/service_img_ea6f5fd8ae.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-10T04:55:49.295Z">Offer your service to the ones who need it 
without any expectation in return.
<img alt="meditation" width="200" height="200" class="has-img-center lazyload" src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/meditation_img_e48987eda1.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-10T04:55:49.331Z">Meditation and other such calming practices help 
in connecting us deeply with the present moment 
and deepen our understanding of gratitude.
<hr class="vertical-space1">
So, cultivate gratitude and see how your life unfolds.
<hr class="vertical-space1">
<hr>
<h4 style="text-align: center;">Article by KARISHMA DESAI 
Illustrations by ARATI SHEDDE</h4>
<hr>
<h4 style="text-align: center;"></h4>

Gratitude

<h4 id="h-karishma-desai-writes-about-her-grandmother-and-what-we-can-learn-from-the-elder-generations">
 KARISHMA
 DESAI
 writes about her grandmother, and what we can learn from the elder
 generations.
</h4>

<hr class="vertical-space1" />


 When I count my blessings, I count my grandma twice. I am so lucky to
 have her around. Shantaben Dave is in her late 90s and resides happily
 with her loving family in Kolkata, India. Her spirits are indomitable.



 When I was a child, and even now, when I meet my grandma I rush to
 express my love with my hugs, kisses, and cuddles. She looks at me in
 utter despair, thinking, “Why is such a display of love necessary?” She
 comes from a generation when love was not expressed in that way. I never
 understood this as a child. It was only later in life, when I started
 the Heartfulness practice, that I learned to appreciate the phrase,
 “That which is sacred need not be made profane.” To my grandma, her
 children and her dear ones are sacred, and her entire life is an
 expression of her love for us.



 Despite never having attended school, she was our first teacher. She was
 not educated; it was her sheer eagerness to read spiritual texts that
 made her teach herself to read. She made sure that all her children
 completed their education, so they did not have to face the challenges
 she had faced in life.



 She taught us important life learnings through folk tales, delivered in
 a very local dialect, which added to the whole experience. Even now,
 when my children and I visit her, we gather around her feet and
 attentively listen to her stories, which have simple lessons. Her
 devotional songs and stories of love for God kindled an inner search in
 me, which eventually led me to pursue the Heartfulness way at the age of
 18. Her engaging folk tales always aroused feelings of love,
 appreciation, devotion, joy, service, care, compassion, honesty,
 courage, etc., all of which helped me greatly to shape my adult life.



 Her teachings are not restricted to storytelling, but also exist in her
 resilient actions. She is a role model and displays all the qualities I
 aspire to have. Despite having lost several of her loved ones –
 including her spouse, children, and a grandchild – we have never seen
 her morose. Even in her late nineties, she tackles challenges easily and
 encourages everyone to keep moving on with a smile and be grateful for
 what they still have.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<hr />

<h4 class="has-text-align-center">
 To my grandma, her
 children and her dear ones are sacred,
 and her entire life is an expression of her love for
 us.
</h4>

<hr />

<hr class="vertical-space1" />


 Her memory is very sharp. She can still sing songs without reading their
 lyrics. She can recall the events from when my mother was born (my mom
 is 75!).&nbsp; Her life possessions can be packed in a small handbag,
 and yet she is most generous in showering us with gifts when we visit
 her.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<img alt="beauty-of-elders2" class="lazyload has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/beauty_of_elders2_6db2068ae1.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-11T09:54:42.650Z" />


<hr class="vertical-space1" />


 I can never forget a moving conversation I had with her a few years
 back. We were concerned about a relative who was diagnosed with dementia
 and could not even remember her name. I expressed my concern to my
 grandma: “What will happen if you develop dementia and forget us
 all?” At this open expression of concern, my grandma instantly and
 lovingly reassured me that I need not be worried. She explained to me
 that since this relative had no one to talk to, she forgot who she was,
 “whereas I,” she proudly explained, “can never forget myself because you
 all remind me of who I am.” She was happy to share that everyone around
 her loves her. Even her many grandchildren around the globe call her
 often and connect with her. “How can I ever forget myself when I have so
 many loved ones reminding me of who I am.”



 Her simple reassurance brought tears to my eyes as I thought about all
 those grandparents who do not have such deep connections as this.



 I live oceans apart from my dear grandma, but I hold her tight in my
 heart. I send her love and continue to feel close to her. Most
 importantly, I call her every now and then to remind her of what she
 means to me.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<hr />

<h4 class="has-text-align-center">
 We have all learned so
 much from their generation of wisdom,
 love, courage, and generosity. It is now the time, more
 than ever, to shower them with love and care, and never
 let them forget themselves.
</h4>

<hr />

<hr class="vertical-space1" />


 I request the readers to join me in a positive intention for the happy,
 healthy, and joyful life of all the loving and selfless grandparents and
 elders of the world who have shaped our lives for the better. We have
 all learned so much from their generation of wisdom, love, courage, and
 generosity. It is now the time, more than ever, to shower them with love
 and care, and never let them forget themselves.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<hr />

<h4 class="has-text-align-center">Illustrations by PRAMITI RAMCHANDRA</h4>

<hr />

The beauty of elders

<h4
 id="h-karishma-desai-introduces-the-principle-of-entrainment-and-the-synchronicity-between-all-things-found-in-nature-she-highlights-the-role-of-the-heart-as-the-entrainer-par-excellence-and-the-way-to-sync-the-rest-of-our-body-with-the-heart-to-discover-the-ultimate-entrainment">
 KARISHMA DESAI
 introduces the principle of entrainment, and the synchronicity between all
 things found in nature. She highlights the role of the heart as the
 entrainer par excellence, and the way to sync the rest of our body with the
 heart to discover the ultimate entrainment.
</h4>

<hr class="vertical-space1" />


 The Spirit and the Heart are one. It is the heart that is at one with
 God, not the mind. To discover one’s own heart is to discover God. —Dr. David R. Hawkins


<hr class="vertical-space1" />


 I have always been fascinated by the principle of entrainment – the natural
 state of resonance between two oscillating frequencies. You may remember from
 school the physics experiment of the two tuning forks: when one vibrating fork
 is brought next to the other, their frequencies sync naturally. In physics,
 this synchronicity between objects toward the higher oscillating frequency is
 known as Entrainment.



 A few years ago, I was introduced to the Brighter Minds cognitive course for
 children. As I facilitated these sessions, I witnessed the magic of sound
 entrainment in the enhancement of children’s cognitive abilities. After being
 exposed to entrainment music, the children could effortlessly tap into their
 intuitive abilities and accurately identify the color of a ball in front of
 them while blindfolded. I was able to witness the cognitive enhancement of
 these children utilizing the sound entrainment technique. This experience
 increased my fascination to observe more examples of synchronicity around me.



 When we are thinking of buying a certain brand of car, we spot that brand
 everywhere we go. As soon as we get interested in something, it seems to pop
 out of nowhere. Maybe it was always there, but we start noticing it more
 clearly now due to our interest in it. I started discovering entrainment both
 in my outer and inner worlds.



 I was in awe of the beautiful synchronicity in nature. A flock of birds flying
 together in one direction. When one bird changes direction, the others
 naturally follow, as if there is an automatic synchronicity in their actions.
 A school of fish swims collectively in the same rhythmic pattern as if it’s
 automated. I started noticing that, in nature, all things tend to remain in
 sync or harmony with each other. I started seeing entrainment as a natural
 state of balance or harmony culminating in complete osmosis.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<div class="block-image">
 <figure>
 <img decoding="async" width="600" height="600" alt="Entrainment2" class="has-img-center lazyload"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/Entrainment2_dc84848669.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-12T07:19:35.317Z" />
 </figure>
</div>

<hr class="vertical-space1" />


 As a breathing coach, I learned to utilize breath entrainment for relaxation
 and healing. We can use our breath to entrain the body into a balanced and
 calmer state. This slowing down of our breath is followed by relaxation of the
 body and mind, which activates the parasympathetic nervous system. Using this
 breath-entrainment technique at bedtime is particularly beneficial for
 insomnia and related issues.



 I became more aware of how my body is in sync with the rhythms of the day and
 night. I am fresh as a flower as the sun rises, while I feel the need to relax
 more and preserve my energies as the sun sets. I vividly observe how my body’s
 circadian rhythms or biological clock is entrained with the solar and lunar
 cycles.



 According to physics, entrainment enables energy efficiency – it saves a lot
 of energy. Imagine how our universe would function if things worked against
 each other and there was no sync? There would be complete chaos in our world.
 And we all know the havoc that is created in our bodies if our organs are not
 in harmony with each other.



 According to the Heart Math Institute, the heart is the strongest biological
 oscillator in the human system, and the rest of the body’s systems are pulled
 into entrainment with the heart’s rhythm.



 I started noticing how tuning into my heart was a natural way to bring my
 whole system into a state of harmony. This resonance reduced the conflicting
 messages from my mind as I started trusting the voice of my heart. I
 experienced enhanced joy, peace, and love in my entire being. I became more
 deeply tuned with the present moment and moved from chaos to calm.



 This can easily be achieved when we meditate upon the source of light in our
 hearts as prescribed in Heartfulness. When we begin to practice meditation
 with this method, and entrain ourselves to the higher frequency of the heart,
 it feels like tuning into a pool of Infinity. I wonder if the yogic
 Transmission utilized in Heartfulness Meditation gives us access to the
 “Ultimate entrainment” – that in which the heart is in complete osmosis with
 the source of the Infinite, the Divine. I am eager to discover this
 possibility. What are we waiting for?



 End of the end is Infinity. —Babuji


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

Entrainment

<h4 style="text-align:justify;">KARISHMA DESAI shares her unique perspective on the integration of HeartMath and Heartfulness practices and research, and how this collaboration leads us to a bright future.</h4>In a world where stress has become an all-too-common companion, finding effective ways to navigate its challenges is essential. Dr. Rollin McCraty, Director of Research at the HeartMath® Institute, offers a compelling reminder: “Stress is a form of hurried aging.”No one wants to age rapidly, yet many of us, particularly in high-pressured corporate environments, grapple with stress. As a coach, my mission is to explore and offer evidence-based methods to alleviate stress and build resilience. This passion led me to become a HeartMath Certified Trainer.&nbsp;HeartMath practices guide us toward coherence, a harmonious state in which the heart, brain, and body operate in perfect sync, fostering mental clarity, emotional equilibrium, and elevated overall performance. Utilizing biofeedback devices, coherence can be measured, and regular practice results in an enhanced capacity for resilience.<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">HeartMath practices guide us toward coherence, a harmonious state in which the heart, brain, and body operate in perfect sync, fostering mental clarity, emotional equilibrium, and elevated overall performance.</h4><hr><figure class="image image-style-align-center"><img src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/the_hearts_wisdom2_2de8f38b2f.jpg"></figure><h3 style="text-align:justify;">Transforming emotional landscapes for health and happiness</h3>This inspired me to perceive my body as an energy system that expands and replenishes its energy reserves to maintain optimal functioning. I soon realized that these reserves are intimately linked to how I manage my emotions. We have all experienced the ebb and flow of energy as it rises with uplifting emotions and depletes with draining ones.To understand my emotional landscape, I noted down the emotions that depleted my energy reserves. As I delved into my journal, I discovered numerous negative emotions constantly playing in the background, from fears of job loss, health concerns, and missed promotions to daily frustrations like traffic jams, mounting household chores, and minor setbacks at work. These unwarranted fears and stressors were depleting my energy reserves, while uplifting emotions such as joy, gratitude, and contentment were far fewer in comparison. No wonder I often felt drained before the day was even over, weighed down by these invisible energy leaks.Take a moment to reflect on your emotional landscape:&nbsp;How do your personal negative thoughts and worries affect your energy levels?&nbsp;Can you identify instances where uplifting emotions like a shared laugh with a loved one, an accomplishment at work, or a quiet moment of appreciation have boosted your vitality?&nbsp;By recognizing the impact of both draining and uplifting emotions, you can take the first step toward cultivating a more balanced and energy-efficient state. Through HeartMath practices, I discovered how to preserve my energy and reduce the drain from costly emotions. As a trainer, it is my privilege to share these powerful techniques with others seeking to master the art of energy conservation and wisely manage their emotional investments.<h3 style="text-align:justify;">Emotional landscapes and heart rhythms</h3>During his <a href="https://www.heartfulnessmagazine.com/the-science-of-heart-coherence/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">recent address</a> at the Integrative Health and Well-being Summit in December 2022, organized by the Heartfulness Institute, Dr. Rollin McCraty explained the profound influence our emotional landscape has on our heart rhythms. Positive emotions like care and appreciation generate more coherent patterns, while negative emotions like anger and frustration yield incoherent ones. This revelation underscores the importance of consciously cultivating positive emotions.I can attest to the transformative power of intentional positivity. A few years ago, I navigated a challenging health crisis, and made the conscious choice to surround myself with an atmosphere of gratitude and appreciation. This positive outlook not only expedited my healing journey but also laid the foundation for a purposeful and harmonious life that continues to unfold.<h3 style="text-align:justify;">The heart’s magnetic influence</h3>Dr. McCraty then went on to say how each heartbeat produces a magnetic field that can be measured as far as three feet outside the body. Our thoughts and emotions are broadcast by this magnetic field. It’s like our magnetic fields communicate with each other before we even start conversing with someone verbally.Can you recall a time when you felt an inexplicable sense of warmth and comfort in the presence of a friend or family member, even before speaking to them?&nbsp;Conversely, have you ever experienced unease around someone without an apparent reason?As we strive for personal coherence, we can positively influence the energy fields of others. I’ve observed how my meditation practice creates a calming atmosphere at home, possibly due to the magnetic field I generate. If we can affect our immediate environments in this way, can we extend our influence beyond our homes? The answer is a resounding yes. Each of us plays a crucial role in shaping the world around us.<figure class="image"><img src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/the_hearts_wisdom3_12ad1c91ff.jpg"></figure>HeartMath research shows that when we achieve a coherent state, we become more attuned to one another and the Earth’s magnetic field. This interconnectivity underscores the view that we are all deeply linked, revealing the profound extent of our harmonization with the planet and each other. In pursuit of this goal, the HeartMath Institute invites heart-centered practitioners to join their complimentary Global Coherence App, fostering a worldwide movement to promote individual and planetary well-being by radiating love and compassion across the globe. Together, we can bring a shift in global consciousness, ushering in an era of increased peace and harmony.<figure class="image image-style-align-center"><img src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/the_hearts_wisdom4_1d15334e81.jpg"></figure><h3 style="text-align:justify;">Science as the language of mysticism: unveiling the energetic heart</h3>As a practitioner of Heartfulness for over two decades, and a trainer, I have been captivated by the enigmatic nature of our hearts. When we speak of the heart in this context, we refer not only to the physical organ, but also to the deeper abstract energetic heart that serves as the seat of human wisdom.I have often sought scientific explanations, to both validate the personal and intimate experiences of the energetic heart, and also to bridge the gap for skeptics who better comprehend the language of science. I wanted to find a scientific framework that could reinforce my unwavering faith in the heart’s extraordinary wisdom, while also extending the understanding and benefits to those needing scientific backing. My heart was overjoyed when I first encountered Dr. McCraty’s statement in the book, Science of the Heart, “There is compelling evidence to suggest the physical heart is coupled to a field of information not bound by the classical limits of time and space.” This evidence originates from a rigorous experimental study that demonstrated the heart’s ability to receive and process information about future events before they occurs. It supports the notion of the heart’s connection to a higher field or matrix, transcending the boundaries of time and space. This revelation bridges the gap between science and spirituality, inspiring us to delve deeper into the heart's boundless wisdom and potential for transformation.This energetic inner heart establishes a connection to my higher self and forms the very essence of my Heartfulness meditation practice.<hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">It supports the notion of the heart’s connection to a higher field or matrix, transcending the boundaries of time and space.</h4><hr><h3 style="text-align:justify;">Together for change: combining efforts for global peace</h3>As we journey together in Heartfulness, we strive to reach the tipping point of a positive shift in the evolution of global consciousness, mirroring the vision of the HeartMath® Global Coherence App. With open hearts, these complementary practices are coming together for both personal and planetary well-being.&nbsp;The importance of collaboration and harnessing the power of our collective efforts for the greater good is the need of the hour. By coming together in our Universal Prayer for the restoration of peace and faith in humanity, we can magnify our positive intentions, creating a world of connection, compassion, and love that will endure for generations to come.<figure class="image image-style-align-center"><img src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/the_hearts_wisdom5_45be1e0521.jpg"></figure><hr><h4 style="text-align:center;">Embrace the ripple effect and the profound impact of heart-focused practices, contributing to a connected, compassionate global community.</h4><hr><h3 style="text-align:justify;">Nurturing inner and outer connections: heartful practices</h3><ul><li style="text-align:justify;">Embrace heart-centered practices: Begin each day with heart-focused breathing and Heartfulness Meditation.&nbsp;</li><li style="text-align:justify;">Pursue complementary techniques: Combine practices for a harmonious mind, body, and heart connection.&nbsp;</li><li style="text-align:justify;">Master emotional self-regulation: Engage in intelligent energy management to achieve emotional balance.&nbsp;</li><li style="text-align:justify;">Cultivate positivity and coherence: Activate positive emotions and sustain a meditative state to reach coherence.&nbsp;</li><li style="text-align:justify;">Unite for a higher purpose: Collaborate with others to promote world peace and harmony, transcending individual goals.&nbsp;</li></ul>Embrace the ripple effect and the profound impact of heart-focused practices, contributing to a connected, compassionate global community. Together, we build a better future for generations to come.&nbsp;&nbsp;HeartMath is a registered trademark of Quantum Intech Inc. (dba HeartMath Inc.) For a list of HeartMath-owned trademarks go to www.heartmath.com/trademarks.

The heart’s wisdom

Karishma has an educational background in Medicine and Law. She has worked as a doctor in the Australian public hospital system, and taught medical students at the University of Notre Dame, Sydney. Her expertise in parenting integrates her experience as a medical professional and a parent.

Karishma-Stretton.jpg

Karishma Stretton

<h4
 id="h-dr-karishma-stretton-is-a-doctor-and-medical-educator-who-has-focused-her-attention-on-parenting-here-she-speaks-with-elizabeth-denley-about-her-new-book-and-the-timeless-wisdom-that-will-help-us-to-raise-happy-and-well-adjusted-children"
 >
 DR. KARISHMA STRETTON
 is a doctor and medical educator who has focused her attention on
 parenting. Here she speaks with
 ELIZABETH DENLEY
 about her
 <a
 href="https://www.drkarishmastretton.com.au/the-7-eternal-truths"
 target="_blank"
 rel="noreferrer noopener"
 >new book</a
 >, and the timeless wisdom that will help us to raise happy and
 well-adjusted children.
 </h4>

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 
 Q: Hi, Karishma, welcome to Heartfulness Magazine.
 

 
 KS: Hello,
 Elizabeth. It’s lovely to be talking with you. Thanks for your time.
 

 
 Q: We’re here to talk about your book,
 Parenting Homo Sapiens: The Seven Eternal Truths for Raising Happy
 Humans. A great title and a hot topic, so first tell us about yourself, and
 why you’re interested in this.
 

 
 KS: I’m a
 wife and mother of two daughters, and we live in Sydney, Australia.
 After graduating with a medical degree, I worked at Nepean Hospital, and
 then moved to education at the University of Notre Dame, where I taught
 medical students. Right now, I spend most of my time with my children,
 and am very involved with their education.
 

 
 Q: Tell us about your book, Karishma.
 

 
 KS: The
 inspiration came after the birth of my eldest daughter. I was a young
 working mother. There was so much information available on parenting,
 and I was determined to distill the essence of it all.
 

 
 At that time I worked long hours as a doctor at Nepean Hospital, with
 very few holidays. The environment required me to suppress the fact that
 I was also a mother, and commit my full attention to the job. I’m sure
 many women relate to a high-pressured work environment. Denying my role
 as a mother at work was very confronting. It made me question what I was
 doing, and what effect this would have on my children, my husband, my
 family, and myself.
 

 

 <h4>
 Common Threads to Effective Parenting Methods
 </h4>

 
 I began to read, and was not convinced that there needed to be so many,
 sometimes contradictory, ways of raising children. I wanted to find the
 common threads that bound all types of effective parenting.
 

 
 As I read, the common themes emerged, and I wrote this book so that
 those parents who don’t have time to read all the literature could have
 a reference on their parenting journey. I was mainly interested in what
 enables us to raise happy, healthy, well-adjusted human beings. If
 children have those qualities, then happiness and enjoyment will result
 later in life.
 

 
 Finally, I felt so much gratitude to the authors and mothers who had
 written blog pieces on parenting, and produced parenting and birthing
 videos, because that information was pivotal for me on my journey. I
 hope that my learning will also resonate with parents. I want to pay
 forward the amazing and inspirational help I received.
 

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <hr />

 <h4 class="has-text-align-center">
 We may not be here to see the impact of our parenting,
 but when we raise well-adjusted, kind, loving,
 intelligent, compassionate human beings, we bring
 meaningful, long-lasting change to this world.
 </h4>

 <hr />

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <div class="block-image">
 <figure>
 <img
 width="700"
 height="554"
 alt="7-eternal-truths2"
 class="lazyload has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/7_eternal_truths2_700x554_63b5ef61de.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-11T14:05:41.350Z"
 />
 </figure>
 </div>

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <h4>
 Developing Confidence as a Parent
 </h4>

 
 Q: Why isn’t good parenting an innate function? Why do we need to
 learn?
 

 
 KS: It
 seems like a simple question, but it really is the crux of the matter.
 J.W. Whitehead said, “Children are the living messages we send to a time
 we will not see. ”We may not be here to see the impact of our parenting,
 but when we raise well-adjusted, kind, loving, intelligent,
 compassionate human beings, we bring meaningful, long-lasting change to
 this world.
 

 
 The fact is, our children are going to take over the reins and steer
 humanity in the not-so-distant future. I read recently that our greatest
 contribution to the universe may not be something we do, but someone we
 raise. It was this epiphany that highlighted to me the importance of
 parenting.
 

 
 Q: You also say that this is not new, and it’s universal. You talk
 about the 7 eternal truths for raising happy humans, not separate
 truths for raising them in Sydney or Colombo. What are these eternal
 truths?
 

 
 KS: I use
 the term “eternal truths” to describe principles that have been tried
 and tested over time and have remained true. They are independent of
 rapid societal changes. Even though we are powering ahead
 technologically and socially, biologically we are the same as we were
 hundreds of thousands of years ago. If we can determine what these
 eternal truths are, we can fulfill them despite the rapid pace at which
 our society is traveling. What do our babies need biologically, and what
 do we need as parents?
 

 
 A baby Homo sapiens today is genetically programmed with the same
 expectations as a baby born 300,000 years ago. The same is true for
 women undergoing the transformation from woman to mother.
 

 
 After reading and processing decades worth of parenting knowledge, I
 began to discover some magnificent golden threads. Consistently and
 confidently applying these threads creates a bedrock for a satisfying
 and fulfilling parenting experience of raising our children with
 confidence.
 

 
 Speaking from experience, it’s the confidence that a lot of us lack. We
 often feel we are not parenting correctly, or that we are depriving our
 children of what they need to develop thoroughly. The good news is that
 if we apply these eternal truths, then we’ll give our children exactly
 what they need, so they are assured of a fulfilling childhood.
 

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <div class="block-image">
 <figure>
 <img
 width="700"
 height="554"
 alt="7-eternal-truths3"
 class="lazyload has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/7_eternal_truths3_700x554_f6fecdd09f.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-11T14:06:19.915Z"
 />
 </figure>
 </div>

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <hr />

 <h4 class="has-text-align-center">
 I use the term “eternal truths” to describe principles that
 have been tried and tested over time and have remained
 true. They are independent of rapid societal
 changes.
 </h4>

 <hr />

 <h4>
 The 7 Eternal Truths
 </h4>

 
 You must be wondering what these eternal truths are. I’ll give you three
 examples. You’ll find the others in my book.
 

 
 Truth 1: Human babies and children have fundamental
 biological expectations.
 

 
 Truth 2: What we inscribe in the child’s mind will echo
 throughout their lifetime.
 

 
 Truth 3: Parents are epigenetic engineers – engineering
 the future.
 

 They’re the main concepts we will cover here.

 <h4>
 Biological Expectations
 </h4>

 
 Q: Talk to us about the fundamental biological expectations. What are
 they? How important are they, especially during the early years?
 

 
 KS:
 Biological expectations are the biological needs we are genetically
 designed to experience during childhood. The environment into which a
 baby was born 300,000 years ago may differ from the environment into
 which a baby is born today, but the biological expectations remain the
 same, just as our DNA is the same. These biological expectations provide
 a framework for children to grow, thrive, and meet their innate
 potential. They go beyond the survival needs of clean water, nutrition,
 shelter, basic human connection, etc.
 

 
 What are these biological expectations? We can look at them within the
 context of Jean Liedloff’s The Continuum Concept, a book that
 many parents will know. She speaks about the most fundamental
 expectations being:
 

 <ol>
 <li>The baby is placed on the mother after birth, skin-to-skin.</li>
 <li>
 Carrying the baby is extremely important, particularly in the first
 year of life. The mother is often most involved with this.
 </li>
 <li>
 The baby’s needs are responded to. This sounds basic, but it is not
 necessarily what happens. It is genetically programmed in the baby.
 </li>
 <li>
 The baby sleeps in close proximity to the mother, ideally in a safe
 co-sleeping environment. There is a lot of information now on how to
 co-sleep safely with children.
 </li>
 <li>
 The baby is breastfed or bottle-fed on demand, as a biological
 expectation.
 </li>
 </ol>

 
 These expectations are vital for the development of physically and
 psychologically sound children. If we fulfill these biological
 expectations, happiness will naturally become a normal condition of
 their existence. The more research I do, the more I feel that this is a
 basic truth.
 

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <div class="block-image">
 <figure>
 <img
 width="379"
 height="569"
 alt="7-eternal-truths5"
 class="lazyload has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/7_eternal_truths5_6833af97bc.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-11T14:06:54.875Z"
 />
 </figure>
 </div>

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <h4>
 Bonding and Attachment
 </h4>

 
 Q: You also talk about bonding and attachment: when biological
 expectations are fulfilled, it automatically leads to bonding and
 attachment, which determines the way we form relationships as children
 and as adults. Can you talk about how that attachment develops?
 

 
 KS:
 Attachment is the formation of a connection dependent on the closeness
 of two human beings. We’re well aware that attachment is vital for the
 survival of baby mammals and birds, but it is most important for baby
 humans, because they are the most helpless of any babies on the planet.
 For human babies, no attachment means no life. It is as simple as that.
 

 
 It creates the sensory and emotional environment that shapes the way we
 experience relationships lifelong. Breaking this bond at the beginning
 of a baby’s life can be devastating, and it may set up potential cycles
 of sub optimal relationships. Human babies are genetically programmed to
 seek out attachment. You may be aware of the rooting reflex, where after
 birth the baby instantly seeks out the nipple of the mother. Also,
 babies align their breathing and heart rate to that of the parent
 they’re sleeping next to. These behaviors enhance attachment between
 parent and child.
 

 
 There are a few key points that are vital for understanding attachment.
 First, you cannot over-attach with your child. Attachment does not
 create a child who is more needy or insecure; the opposite is true. The
 child who has attached well when they’re young will display independence
 and maturity when they’re older.
 

 
 In the book, Hold On to Your Kids, Gordon Neufeld and Gabor
 Maté state that dependence and attachment foster independence and
 genuine separation later in life, contrary to what many parents believe
 and practice. In fact, in society today, there almost seems to be a
 pathological desire to make children mature beyond their years, as
 though this is another form of achievement. But in doing that the
 opposite is achieved. So, the time spent in attaching with your children
 when they are young will result in healthy independence when they’re
 older.
 

 
 Second, you need to be present to attach to your child. This seems
 obvious, but a lot of children spend a high percentage of the working
 day away from their parents. This is in no way judging parents whose
 financial or social situation requires them both to work, but attachment
 does require physical presence.
 

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <div class="block-image">
 <figure>
 <img
 decoding="async"
 width="700"
 height="554"
 alt="7-eternal-truths4"
 class="lazyload has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/7_eternal_truths4_700x554_09631c6a8d.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-11T14:08:17.121Z"
 />
 </figure>
 </div>

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 
 If you’re not with your children, it is vital to ask: “Who is forming
 attachments with my children?” Children are hardwired to attach, and
 they will attach to those in their closest vicinity. How well do I know
 their values, beliefs, and mindsets? Am I comfortable with that person
 being a major influence in my child’s life during this extremely
 sensitive period of their development?
 

 
 We cannot ignore the realities that many families face, and that’s why
 it’s vital that we provide support to parents to spend time with their
 children. When we see a lack of attachment between parents and children
 there is a loss of social structure and a breakdown of culture.
 Attachment is a hugely important subject when it comes to raising our
 children.
 

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 To be continued.

7 eternal truths for raising happy humans

<h4
id="h-dr-karishma-stretton-is-a-doctor-and-medical-educator-who-has-focused-her-attention-on-parenting-in-part-2-of-her-interview-with-elizabeth-denley-she-speaks-about-the-psychological-development-of-children-and-the-role-of-epigenetics-and-love"
>
DR. KARISHMA STRETTON
 is a doctor and medical educator who has focused her attention on
 parenting. In part 2 of her interview with
 ELIZABETH DENLEY, she speaks about the psychological development of children, and the
 role of epigenetics and love.
</h4>

<hr class="vertical-space1" />


Q: Can you talk about the psychological development of a child? It’s
 not just at the physical, but also at the more subtle levels of
 consciousness and subconscious levels that we connect with our
 children. Are we calm and loving, stressed and anxious, or are we
 struggling?



You’ve read Bruce Lipton’s work on how the subconscious mind is far more
important in determining our behavior and responses to the world than
the conscious mind, which is a thin film between the subconscious and
the superconscious. What can we do as parents apart from bonding and
meeting biological expectations? How do we move into healthy
psychological development?



KS: It’s beautiful the way you’re describing it, Elizabeth. The conscious
and the subconscious mind and the different ways it comes out in the way
we behave. Our physiology and psychology, even. The brain of the baby
undergoes such rapid development in the first seven years of life. This
period in a child’s development is of enormous potential, but also
requires great care as it represents a time of almost super-charged
hardwiring of the brain. Those who have primary contact with the child
in these early years are effectively engineering the mind of the child.



In the early years, the human brain undergoes a phenomenal rapid
download. It is not only a download of skill sets, like how to
physically survive in this world, but also a program of beliefs – how to
fit into society, where to fit into the scheme of things. In order to
understand how this rapid programming takes place, it is best to think
of the mind as the duality of the conscious and subconscious mind. The
conscious mind is rational, and through it we exercise free will. The
subconscious mind dwells below the level of consciousness, and together
with the unconscious mind, is largely responsible for our beliefs,
habits, and behaviors.



We really need to ask ourselves how our subconscious and unconscious
minds are programmed, because what goes in there when we are young
affects all aspects of life: our beliefs, our limitations, our
physiology, and our health.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<div class="block-image">
<figure>
 <img
 alt="parenting2"
 class="lazyload has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/parenting2_8e6135c00e.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-12T07:28:40.209Z"
 />
</figure>
</div>

<hr class="vertical-space1" />


If we look at the various stages of a child’s development, different
brainwave activity predominates at different stages:



From birth to 2: delta waves. From 2 to 6: theta waves. From 6
to 12: alpha waves. From 12onward: beta waves.



From birth to 2 years, with delta waves predominating, there is a state
of deep relaxation. From two to six years, theta waves predominate,
which can be described as a state of lighter sleep or just waking up.
Hypnotherapists aim to get people into the delta or theta wave states
because of their increased suggestibility. Children do not have a
developed conscious mind, an analytical mind, to filter out all the
input. We could say that children from birth until the age of six are
almost in a hypnotic state, where there’s a real hardwiring in their
brains of the suggestions and behaviors of those around them as truths.



I first discovered this information on parenting when I was reading
Bruce Lipton’s The Biology of Belief. We are effectively
programming the minds of our children. Even though this can be quite
frightening, it’s a wonderful empowering opportunity to program a
positive mindset into our children. I enjoyed being with my children at
bedtime, which I saw as a door into their subconscious minds as they
drifted off to sleep. I enjoyed expressing statements of love for them,
and statements that would empower them with words of positivity, such as
“you’re strong,” “you’re healthy,” “you’re beautiful,” “I’m so grateful
to have you in my life,” “you have incredible qualities that you can
give to this world,” “I’m so proud of who you are.” It’s an opportunity
to create beautiful minds as these words are absorbed into their
subconscious as truths. For me, that’s how I put it into practice with
my own children.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<hr />


In the early years, the human brain undergoes a
 phenomenal rapid download. It is not only a download of
 skill sets, like how to physically survive in this world, but
 also a program of beliefs – how to fit into society, where
 to fit into the scheme of things.


<hr />

<hr class="vertical-space1" />


Q: Can you talk about how suggestibility and the use of positive
 affirmations can also affect us at the epigenetic level? For example,
 Bruce Lipton’s study shows that stress affects the growth of the fetus
 during pregnancy. Can you speak about epigenetics, and how our role as
 parents affects children?



KS: Epigenetics is a relatively new area of science that has helped us
understand the delicate relationship between environmental influences
and our genetic expression. In the past, genetic determinism was the
predominant approach – the belief that our genetics are fixed from
birth, but epigenetics has changed that understanding.



There’s a really good analogy: If DNA is your unique song, the epigenome
is the audio engineer who changes the way the song is played –the
volume, the quality, the adding or removing of certain instruments. In
the same way, our genetics can be altered by our epigenome.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<hr />


Love needs to be abundant, unconditional, and never withdrawn.
 When we combine those with being present for our children,
 and surrounding ourselves with a community of supportive
 individuals, we have the vital ingredients for a rewarding
 parenting style.


<hr />

<hr class="vertical-space1" />


Our epigenetic markers are a set of instructions that sit on top of our
DNA histones. Epigenetic markers are chemical tags that signal or
influence whether or not the gene should compress or unravel to allow
the cell to read the instructions on the DNA. Epigenetic instruction
dictates which genes are switched on and off, so it is the link between
our environmental influence and our health, personality, and even
behavior.



You mentioned Lipton’s example of stress on the fetus, and this is a
perfect example of epigenetics in the context of children. Stress is
such an important case to discuss because it is pervasive in today’s
society, and stress is translated into hormonal and chemical signals.
Everyone’s probably familiar with adrenaline. In the case of a pregnant
woman, stress hormones and chemicals flood her bloodstream, then go
through the placenta into the fetus. It is now well known that women who
experience stress during pregnancy are at greater risk of pre-term
birth. Their babies are at a much greater risk of smaller birth weight,
asthma, allergies, infectious diseases, etc. Also, through epigenetics,
prenatal stress can actually be one of the most powerful influences on
mental health in later life.



And epigenetics can actually work through generations. Ancestral changes
can be passed through to the fetus, and also cause changes further down
the line. We just cannot deny the incredible influence we have over our
children’s genetic expression. Even though it’s daunting and terrifying,
we can actually use this information to maximize our children’s
potential.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<div class="block-image">
<figure>
 <img
 alt="parenting3"
 class="lazyload has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/parenting3_700x466_f6cdfe46de.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-12T07:29:10.118Z"
 />
</figure>
</div>

<hr class="vertical-space1" />


Q: Karishma, how can we do that with kindness to mothers? So much is
 put on mothers. How do we allow women to own this in a very healthy,
 non-judgmental way? We are very good at saying, “Here’s the science.
 Now, unless you do this, this, this, and this, you’re a bad
 mother.”



KS:
I know that feeling too well; the guilt that so many mothers carry
because of the science. We are told lists of things we must do to be
able to tick the boxes and have children who are meeting their
potential.



We need to look at the way our society is at the moment. We’re entering
a period where many people are questioning the status quo. We’ve been
faced with phenomenal challenges that we have not had to deal with
before. Parents are already stressed. Just add to that the complexities
and responsibilities of raising children.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<hr />

<h4 class="has-text-align-center">
One thing we can be certain about is that we have the ability
 to create positive change. We can improve this world
 through the creation of well-adjusted, loving, empathetic
 humans.
</h4>

<hr />

<hr class="vertical-space1" />


One thing we can be certain about is that we have the ability to create
positive change. We can improve this world through the creation of
well-adjusted, loving, empathetic humans. If I look back and reflect on
all the aspects of parenting that contribute to the creation of happy
humans, there’s one common thread and it’s love. The language of love is
the key ingredient. Most other aspects of positive parenting naturally
unfold as a result of love. Love needs to be abundant, unconditional,
and never withdrawn. When we combine those with being present for our
children, and surrounding ourselves with a community of supportive
individuals, we have the vital ingredients for a rewarding parenting
style.&nbsp;



Q: That’s beautiful! Thank you.

Epigenetics and love in parenting

Karuna is the Chief Marketing Officer and Chief Revenue Officer at Nature’s Fynd. She is an accomplished brand builder and Emmy award winner with 25 years of success transforming the world’s most iconic brands.

karuna-rawal.webp

Karuna Rawal

Nature’s humble superfood

Kasha is a Gen Z filmmaker, photographer, writer, social entrepreneur, and advocate for climate justice, peace, and gender equality. She founded The Global Sunrise Project and her first documentary, The Sunrise Storyteller, was screened at over 60 film festivals and has won over 29 awards.

Kasha-Slavner.jpg

Kasha Sequoia Slavner

<h4
 id="h-kasha-sequoia-slavner-discusses-her-journey-as-a-filmmaker-and-activist-her-new-documentary-1-5-degrees-of-peace-highlighting-the-interconnectedness-between-peace-and-climate-justice-and-the-value-of-the-intergenerational-connect-she-is-interviewed-by-purnima-ramakrishnan-in-the-glow-webinar-series"
 >
 KASHA SEQUOIA SLAVNER
 discusses her journey as a filmmaker and activist, her new
 documentary, 1.5 Degrees of Peace, highlighting the
 interconnectedness between peace, and climate justice, and the value
 of the intergenerational connect. She is interviewed by
 PURNIMA RAMAKRISHNAN
 in the GLOW webinar series.
 </h4>

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 
 Q:&nbsp;&nbsp; Hi Kasha, thanks for joining us today.
 

 
 KS:&nbsp; Thank you so much. It’s an honor to be here.
 

 
 Q: You’re a Gen Z filmmaker, photographer, writer, and social
 entrepreneur, who is a passionate advocate for climate justice, peace,
 and gender equality. You founded The Global Sunrise Project at 15. You
 are a frequent UN Youth Delegate, have won the Diana Award and the Kim
 Phúc Award for Youth Peace leadership, and are one of the voices of
 SDG16+. You are also the 2021 Global Youth Climate Network Ambassador.
 Your first feature documentary, The Sunrise Storyteller, was
 screened at over 60 film festivals and has won over 29 awards.
 

 
 How did you come to do all of these amazing things?
 

 
 KS: I have been a social justice advocate since I was little, working in my
 local community. I grew up with a single mom who was highly passionate
 about gender equality, feminist issues, and the environment, so I
 absorbed a lot of her consciousness and care for the world. When I was
 14, we joined an organization called The Canadian Voice of Women for
 Peace that had been working in the disarmament movement since the 1960s.
 We participated in a delegation to a United Nations conference on gender
 equality called The Commission on the Status of Women. That was my first
 trip outside Canada, my first time meeting people from all around the
 world, and my first time hearing stories from people at the grassroots
 level about their own communities.
 

 
 Growing up, I had heard about other countries through a lens of
 sensationalism and stereotypes. I had seen the poverty, the war, the
 things that are highly polarized, but I hadn’t seen or heard the stories
 of triumph over adversity, of people doing great things despite the
 little resources they had. So, when I heard those stories for the first
 time, I was inspired to do something, to make a difference.
 

 
 I thought about what I had to offer as a 14-year-old. I didn’t really
 know who I was, but I knew I wanted to inspire other people to make a
 difference in their communities. I decided to use my passion for visual
 storytelling. I was a hobby photographer at the time, with no
 professional experience, but I wanted to travel and share stories, so
 that other people could feel empowered to take action in their
 communities.
 

 
 That’s how The Sunrise Storyteller came to be. I was going to
 travel, take photos, and write a blog, but it soon developed into a film
 project, even though I had no prior experience of film-making. I
 thought, “I need to help these stories come to life, give people a
 platform to share their stories.” I took a year out of school to pursue
 this.
 

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <div class="block-image">
 <figure>
 <img
 width="700"
 height="466"
 alt="1-5-degrees-peace2"
 class="lazyload has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/1_5_degrees_peace2_700x466_bce6ab127d.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-11T13:37:23.995Z"
 />
 </figure>
 </div>

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <h4>
 Art as an enabler
 </h4>

 
 Q: Kasha, tell us how art can be an enabler for social change and
 social impact.
 

 
 KS: Art is a very special tool. People become statistics when we talk about
 them only from a fact-based perspective. Connecting with people’s
 experiences, and how they are impacted by issues, is a really profound
 way to move them into action and connect them with our shared humanity.
 

 
 For example, climate change is a highly emotional issue. It impacts us
 at the level of survival. You can show those feelings. You can empower
 people with knowledge but also move them with stories. Whichever artform
 you use, whether it is music, visual art, mixed media, photography, or
 anything else, it has a power to really impact people.
 

 
 It also helps us reframe our narratives. What narratives do you want to
 tell about the world? What narratives do you want to create going
 forward? What vision do you have? Art can show the reality of the world,
 and it can also help you dream up a new world.
 

 <h4>
 Intergenerational partnerships
 </h4>

 
 Q: You use the phrase, “intergenerational partnerships.” There are
 GEN Zs, Millennials, and GEN Ys. There is wisdom to be harnessed from
 the older generations, and dynamism to be harnessed from the younger
 generations. How can we harness the power of the intergenerational
 connect?
 

 
 KS:
 Intergenerational partnerships are very special for me because I grew up
 as an only child in the company of my mom and her circles of social
 justice advocates. I was always listening to the conversations of my
 elders. Intergenerational partnerships are key to creating effective
 social justice movements, because we have shared responsibility to be
 caretakers of the Earth, its people, and all living beings.
 

 
 In the past couple of years, youth activists have really taken to the
 forefront, so we hear others saying, “Okay, we are leaving it to you, we
 trust you with this.” While it’s a nice sentiment, it’s almost
 disempowering because it feels like, “This is the world we have
 inherited, and we are responsible for it.” Young people are not in
 positions of power in corporations or governments. We have taken on the
 responsibility of starting our own organizations, but we do need the
 privilege that elders have to uplift our messages, to hear our voices,
 and to train us to come to decision-making tables informed and ready to
 advocate for our needs.
 

 
 Many times, you’ll see that we are invited for the purpose of advocacy
 and we are given a youth voice, but we are not allowed to say what we
 really feel, or we are not prepared to negotiate, or we don’t have the
 knowledge to write policies, so we are brought in, then excluded.
 

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <div class="block-image">
 <figure>
 <img
 width="700"
 height="466"
 alt="1-5-degrees-peace3"
 class="lazyload has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/1_5_degrees_peace3_700x466_40f49db405.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-11T13:38:20.289Z"
 />
 </figure>
 </div>

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <hr />

 <h4 class="has-text-align-center">
 Intergenerational partnerships are key to 
 creating effective social justice movements, because we have
 shared responsibility to be caretakers of the Earth, its
 people, and all living beings.
 </h4>

 <hr />

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 
 Tokenism happens. Youth are brought to the table so that everyone has a
 clear conscience, they have done a good thing, but it is unconscionable
 that it stops there. We have to turn the inspiration and resilience we
 see from youth activism and bring about concrete action. That requires
 the help of intergenerational partnerships. We have a limited time for
 action, we need effective action, and we don’t have time to be spinning
 our wheels.
 

 <h4>
 Intersectionality
 </h4>

 
 Q: What do you think about the intersectionality between climate,
 peace, and the other SDGs? How do you see them all working
 together?
 

 
 KS:
 No issue is separate from the others. Everything is interconnected.
 Every action has an equal and opposite reaction. It’s clear to me that
 climate justice affects peace. When people don’t have their basic needs
 met, there are violent reactions, there is hoarding, there is
 competition for resources, and interpersonal conflict. There is also the
 issue of nuclear disarmament. The whole process of creating and storing
 nuclear weapons destroys environments, often where indigenous
 communities live, where the mining happens. We are also seeing more
 refugees due to climate change, so again interpersonal conflicts. These
 are really critical intersection points that affect women and girls
 disproportionately.
 

 
 When you start looking at the intersectionality of two issues, you see
 how they link to all the others – those listed as SDGs and those not
 listed as SDGs.
 

 <h4>
 Activism
 </h4>

 
 Q: I can feel the passion and activism in your voice. What does the
 word “activism” mean to you? Activism has an element of dynamism – I
 don’t want to use the word violence. How can you be proactive and
 dynamic, and see the fruition of your aspirations, without using
 violence?&nbsp;
 

 
 KS: The way we use language is indicative of our culture and a reflection
 of society. Sometimes we use violent language to describe everyday
 things, but activism is not one of those things. To me, activism is
 caring in action. It has “act” in it, and that means standing up for
 justice, standing up for the liberation of all people. If we don’t, we
 perpetuate violence against others.
 

 
 To me, activism is proactive. It’s not always campaigning and lobbying,
 it’s not always taking a leadership role. Sometimes it’s participating
 in a movement. Sometimes it’s expressing care for the world through art,
 through workshops, or working with youth directly. It’s so clear in my
 heart that it is caring for other people, and taking on our collective
 responsibility to care for the planet.
 

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <hr />

 <h4 class="has-text-align-center">
 Activism is proactive. It’s not always campaigning and
 lobbying, it’s not always taking a leadership role.
 Sometimes it’s participating in a movement.
 </h4>

 <hr />

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <div class="block-image">
 <figure>
 <img
 width="500"
 height="750"
 alt="1.5-degrees-peace4"
 class="lazyload has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/1_5_degrees_peace4_77e19ff03d.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-11T13:39:04.015Z"
 />
 </figure>
 </div>

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <h4>
 1.5 Degrees of Peace
 </h4>

 
 Q: Kasha, tell us about of your latest movie,
 1.5 Degrees of Peace.
 

 
 KS:
 Through 1.5 Degrees of Peace, I hope to make the connection
 between peace and climate justice very clear, highlighting those on the
 ground in the forefront of both movements.&nbsp;
 

 
 We need to bring those two movements together to bring effective action.
 Both issues are staring us down from the future, but they are also
 happening now. Sometimes, we may not see the effects, but people in
 other places see the effects. We need to confront the challenges and
 find creative solutions for action, for positive change. I hope to do
 justice to the scale of the issues and also show opportunities for
 action. That is my goal for 1.5 Degrees of Peace.
 

 
 Q: What do you think of the role of heart-based meditation in
 fulfilling the SDGs, predominantly peace? And can peaceful individuals
 help to achieve the SDGs?
 

 
 KS:
 It’s very important to cultivate a peaceful harmonious humanity. To
 cultivate peace, we need an element of peace within. We need harmony
 within ourselves. I meditate and do physical practices that help me to
 be more mindful. I try my best, I am not perfect, but I continue to work
 at it. I think it’s critical for a peaceful world.
 

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <hr />

 <h4 class="has-text-align-center">
 We have a shared responsibility to care for the planet,
 and also to care for ourselves in the process.
 </h4>

 <hr />

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 
 Q: Kasha, are there any closing thoughts you would like to share with
 us?
 

 
 KS:
 Please remember that you have the potential to make a positive impact in
 the world. Also, reflect on what issues you care about most. Your
 contribution is necessary. We have a shared responsibility to care for
 the planet, and also to care for ourselves in the process. I invite you
 to reflect on that.
 

 
 PR: Thank you so much, Kasha.
 

 <hr class="vertical-space1" />

 
 To watch the full interview, go to <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DQGIwhl4PwY"
 >https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DQGIwhl4PwY</a
 >.

1.5 degrees of peace

Kashish is currently a full-time graduate student pursuing a Master's in Development Practice from Emory University, Atlanta, USA. Born in India, she spent her childhood in the UAE, Russia, Denmark, and India. She has a B.A. from the University of Delhi, a diploma in Bharatanatyam dance, and has volunteered with GRAVIS, Robinhood Army, Sarvahitey, and Girlz, FTW. Kashish is also a certified Heartfulness instructor. She volunteers as an editor for the Heartfulness Magazine and manages her own personal blog. In her free time, Kashish enjoys reading, journaling, watching Korean dramas, and tackling her never ending To-Do List!

Kashish-kalwani.jpg

Kashish Kalwani

<h4
 id="h-kashish-kalwani-breaks-her-goals-into-smaller-chunks-and-finds-more-in-doing-less-she-suggests-how-this-can-help-us-all-accomplish-goals-without-pushing-ourselves-to-the-point-of-burn-out">
 KASHISH KALWANI breaks her goals into smaller
 chunks and finds more in doing less. She suggests how this can help us all accomplish goals without pushing
 ourselves to the point of burn out.
</h4>



<hr class="vertical-space1">



As common thinking-problem types go, I’m type 1,“all-or-nothing” thinking. Everyday I juggle many roles. I am a wife,
 a full-time graduate student, I work a part-time job, and am a meditation instructor, a volunteer for a non-profit
 organization, as well as adjusting to a new continent and culture! And I love to talk about this. I feel productive.
 I feel I have the hang of life. At 23, I also feel pretty burnt out and overwhelmed.



Despite having so much on my plate, and recently winning a super-cool college competition, I felt bummed after a
 conversation with my classmate. My friend had figured out her summer internships for the semester. She had three
 interviews lined up and was applying for more. And here I was, struggling to complete my assignment, which was due
 yesterday. Imposter syndrome is real. I want it all: perfect grades, lots of courses, internships, a thriving social
 life, a good sleep schedule, home-cooked meals, spending time with my husband, and self-care!



The more I do, the less satisfied I feel.



Is there is a point of saturation for satisfaction? After winning a competition and relishing the win for two days, I
 am now constantly worried about the internationals next month. I’m not kind enough to myself because nothing I do
 makes me satisfied. And this feeling only increases. With so much to learn in this world, so much art and media,
 skills, and knowledge, I WANT IT ALL.



I am blessed to have a wonderful support system of family and friends. One of my friends compared me to an elastic
 band: “It’s okay to stretch yourself outside your comfort zone [which clearly, I am good at]; but be careful not to
 stretch yourself to the point of snapping or you will never come back to your original shape.”



I then spent moments ruminating over this lovely visual example. “What is my original state? What is the bigger
 picture?” I found my answer in The Lord of the Rings.



For years I have wanted to read the formidable series by J.R.R. Tolkien. As a full-time graduate student, it is hard
 to find time to read for pleasure,however, not this year! I did not want to give up, so I chose a different
 strategy. Instead of pushing myself through another intimidating goal, I went for a bite-sized goal. As a Gen-Z, we
 love bite-sized content. We push out creativity in smaller and tinier time frames. And it’s enough for our brain to
 take in.



It was set. 5 pages a day. No more, no less.



There are some 1300 pages in The Lord of the Rings series, including The Hobbit. If I read 5 pages
 a day, I should complete the series in 260 days. That’s this year!



And wow, did I feel more relaxed. I might just be able to finish the series this year!It was a eureka moment for me –
 as a person with an“all or nothing” approach, I am either too scared to begin a project because I want it to be
 perfect, or I don’t do it at all.



And that’s not cool either way. I end up losing so much by not beginning and being burnt out in striving for
 perfection.I end up not giving space and grace to myself to keep doing better each day, and I miss out on the joy of
 being a beginner in something where every mistake is a learning point.



<figure class="block-image"><img alt=""></figure>



With these small goals, I am actively taking steps to incorporate “less” and get “more.” Here are a few more ways.




<ol type="1">
 <li>One internship application a day. I break it down to even smaller tasks everyday like:<ul>
 <li>Work on the resume</li>
 <li>Reach out to a professor for a recommendation</li>
 <li>Write a general statement of purpose essay</li>
 <li>Apply to one internship</li>
 <li>Apply to another …</li>
 <li>Take a break</li>
 </ul>
 </li>
 <li>Five-minutes of movement is better than no movement at all. Even better, 1 Surya Namaskar a day.</li>
 <li>Five minutes of meditation a day. I’m showing up!</li>
 <li>One line a day in my journal. Forget the morning pages! Begin slow. Want to make it even smaller?One word a day.
 How do you feel? Write it in one word.</li>
 <li>One meal with my husband. Let it be a space for love. A ritual.</li>
 <li>Huge paperwork to file? File 2 papers a day. (Unless it’s tax – sadly, those things can’t wait.)</li>
 <li>Read 5 pages a day. One chapter a week. I’m finally carving time for the books I enjoy. It’s my most cherished
 evening ritual.</li>
</ol>



One day at a time? How about one hour at a time? This moment in time.



I haven’t reached the page yet where Gandalf shares his wisdom, “All we have to decide is what to do with the time
 that is given to us.”



I am getting there, 5 pages a day. More and more of less and less.



<hr class="vertical-space1">

Are you satisfied with your goals and dreams?

Eco-anxiety

<h4>The last year has seen many of us grieving the loss of loved ones and looking for
 strength amidst tragedy. Here are a few stories from readers of Heartfulness Magazine about their
 experiences.</h4>



<hr class="vertical-space1">



<h2 class="has-text-align-center" style="color:#b8942f">Resilience in the Time of Covid
</h2>



<h4 class="has-text-align-center has-black-color">FIONA NEARY</h4>



<div class="block-image">
 <figure><img decoding="async" width="415" height="580" alt="" class="lazyload has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/stories_loss_resilience2_9dd1f22dd4.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-10T11:52:40.096Z">
 </figure>
</div>


<hr class="vertical-space1">



This past year has been riddled with new and difficult experiences for everyone on the planet. Some days have seemed
 very dark, and it can be hard to find the strength to push through. I have been fortunate to live with my parents
 while safely continuing my education online. I believe resilience lies in hope for the brighter days ahead. I have
 found a few things that have helped me to feel grounded and sanguine amidst this global pandemic.



My mom and I often walk our dog together and we love to talk about possibilities for the future, no matter how
 unlikely they may seem. I think dreaming and imagining the best-case-scenario for our lives is very important, because
 it is easy to get caught up in current circumstances or relive past failures. These conversations helped me to stay in
 a growth mindset, along with my meditation practice. During these walks, we notice the mosses, the strange mushrooms
 on logs, trillium flowers in the spring … all these reminders that life has a way of moving forward despite a long
 winter. Last month, the new growth in our flowerbeds froze completely, and I worried that the bleeding hearts would
 not blossom. But the next day, they thawed! Now we have beautiful pink heart-shaped flowers.



By observing nature, whether hiking or painting a landscape, I have always felt more at ease and resilient, with
 infinite wonders to contemplate.



<hr class="vertical-space1">



<hr>


<hr class="vertical-space1">



<h2 class="has-text-align-center" style="color:#f26529">What Is in the Air?</h2>



<h4 class="has-text-align-center">KASHISH KALWANI</h4>



<div class="block-image">
 <figure><img decoding="async" width="600" height="445" alt="" class="lazyload has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/stories_loss_resilience3_3dc916dbde.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-18T10:24:42.284Z">
 </figure>
</div>


<hr class="vertical-space1">



I keep hearing it everywhere. The virus is in the air now. The sickness is in the air.



It’s a risky affair. The air is limitless. It cannot be contained. What do I do then?



I lost a friend, then my grandmother, and then a teacher. How do you speak to someone who has lost a loved one? How
 do I allow myself to feel grief ? How do I feel comfortable with the idea that my biggest contribution is to get
 vaccinated and stay at home?



What is my intention of being resilient and staying grateful in a time like this? Does intention precede action?
 Should I plunge into the action of being resilient and practice gratitude, and let the intention speak for itself ?




I acted.



<ol>
 <li>I picked up paintbrushes again. They had gathered a fine layer of dust by years of lying around packed in a
 cupboard. I am no artist, but I painted 25 postcards. I rearranged sensational words of newspaper articles to form
 meaningful phrases.</li>
 <li>My family and I have an unspoken agreement to watch a movie together. It’s quality time where we’re all in it
 together.</li>
 <li>I’m capturing everything in short videos. Life has slowed down, yet the days seem to blur into the same routine
 and uncertainty. I capture the mother bird feeding her chicks, the drops of rain falling from the roof, my father
 brewing masala chai for my mother – the casual magic of the day. Suddenly, every moment seems magical and filled
 with stories, if you allow your imagination to go wild.</li>
 <li>Meditation has become an anchor, which seems the only non-negotiable thing from my earlier routine. It existed
 before, exists now, and will exist in the future. I am grateful for this anchor in a rough ocean filled with waves
 of emotions.</li>
 <li>Finally, I write love letters to myself. I wish to give myself the same empathy, time, space, and love as I give
 to others.</li>
</ol>



From sickness in the air, I wish to anchor the idea of “love is in the air.” Resilience and gratitude follow.


<hr class="vertical-space1">



<div class="block-image">
 <figure><img decoding="async" width="600" height="445" alt="" class="lazyload has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/stories_loss_resilience4_b3c835ddb5.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-10T11:55:56.336Z">
 </figure>
</div>



<hr class="vertical-space1">



<hr>


<hr class="vertical-space1">



<h2 class="has-text-align-center" style="color:#323a97">People You Take for Granted</h2>



<h4 class="has-text-align-center">SHANTHI VENKAT</h4>



<div class="block-image">
 <figure><img decoding="async" width="600" height="445" alt="" class="lazyload has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/stories_loss_resilience5_bbdc43f8e4.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-10T11:57:06.720Z">
 </figure>
</div>


<hr class="vertical-space1">



Like many South Asian immigrants living in the United States, my parents lived in India with my brother. I visited
 them in January 2020, right before the pandemic hit. In January 2021, both my parents got Covid. My mom passed away
 within a couple of days. My dad suffered with Covid complications and passed away in April.



Parents are the reason for our existence in this world. Almost all of us feel that our parents will live forever
 until the day comes when they are no longer with us. I don’t think I will ever have closure, as I did not see them
 physically when they passed on.



There will always be a void when I think of my parents’ home, which is now empty.



<hr class="vertical-space1">



<hr>


<hr class="vertical-space1">



<h2 class="has-text-align-center" style="color:#88b45f">The Pure Joy of Existence</h2>



<h4 class="has-text-align-center">SIMMI VALECHA</h4>



<div class="block-image">
 <figure><img decoding="async" width="415" height="580" alt="" class="lazyload has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/stories_loss_resilience6_0689d6114e.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-10T11:49:21.823Z">
 </figure>
</div>


<hr class="vertical-space1">



Life is beautiful. Its beauty is coded in the ancient wisdom of Sat-Chit-Ananda. The shift from misery to
 happiness is not about achieving or gaining something. It’s simply about being awakened to our own truth. All our
 lives we identify with our titles and our bodies – big and small, beautiful and ugly, old and young – and we feel a
 distinction in ourselves from others. We feel either superior or inferior to others, we categorize ourselves into
 different classes, colors, nations, belief systems, ideologies … the list is endless. It’s only when the ego dissolves
 that we experience unity with our higher Self and bliss prevails. Once we’re awakened to our own light the shift
 happens. We realize that we are pure consciousness experiencing only a part of our eternal existence in this physical
 dimension.



Today’s pandemic has delivered this message to us too profoundly. The need of the hour is to rebuild the connection
 with our own Self and our environment, too. Do you remember the last time the full moon in the sky amazed you, or a
 beautiful wildflower caught your attention? It’s not only an invisible virus that is powerful; the tiny joys of our
 lives conceal within them an unfathomable potential to awaken our healing.



We receive what we seek authentically and radiate vibrantly. Let’s seek and receive blessings today. And that will
 happen once we cherish what we already have. Our surroundings, the house we live in, the work we do, our own healthy
 physical bodies, and our relationships. Let’s appreciate these and count our blessings today. When we listen to our
 inner whispers we discover that so much within is healed.



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<h2 class="has-text-align-center" style="color:#f26529">The Beauty of Impermanence</h2>



<h4 class="has-text-align-center">SARALA UPADHYA</h4>



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 <figure><img decoding="async" width="600" height="445" alt="" class="lazyload has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/stories_loss_resilience7_014e1d648f.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-10T11:51:07.110Z">
 </figure>
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See how the last yellow leaf fell and was swirled away? And the tiny root that
 peeped out of the hard nut!



See the white expanse of freshly fallen snow? And the hope of spring just a little
 below the slush!



See that tiny little movement even in a mountain? And a tiny little stillness in the
 flowing river!



That is the real beauty. That is the beauty of Nature.



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<h4 class="has-text-align-center">Illustrations by KASHISH KALWANI</h4>




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Stories of loss and resilience

Katara is an entrepreneur, a leader in both non- and for-profit organizations, a sought-after coach, author, and podcast host dedicated to cultivating spaces where Black, Indigenous, and Women of Color (BIWOC) belong. She is committed to amplifying the richness of BIWOC and their stories, while also providing emotional well-being resources for them through her App, Exhale.

Katara-mccarty-150x150-1.jpg

Katara McCarty

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<h4 style="text-align: justify">
 KATARA MCCARTY&nbsp;is the source and inspiration for EXHALE, a well-being App for Black,
 Indigenous, and Women of Color. In December 2020, she was interviewed by
 MAMATA VENKAT about her life long journey
 creating resources for some of the most marginalized people in society, and
 her approach to spirituality.
</h4>

<hr class="vertical-space1" />


 Q: I want to make sure I’m pronouncing your name correctly. It’s
 [kuh-TAH-ruh]?
 


 KM: Yes! How do I pronounce your name?


 Q: [MUH-muh-thuh]


 KM:&nbsp;I remember the first days of
 school, when they would come across my name. I would know that I was next
 because the teachers would pause, look at the list, and dodge it. You can
 probably totally relate. I remember being little and having to teach my
 teachers how to say my name. My whole life.


 Q: That has been me my whole life. Inevitably someone follows up with, “Can
 I give you a nickname?” And I always say, “No! Learn how to say my name.
 It’s not that difficult.”


 This has been a very interesting year, a very difficult year for the Black
 community. How are you doing?


 KM:&nbsp;With the pandemic, there was so
 much uncertainty in the beginning, and being quarantined I lost over half my
 clientele. I’m a public speaker and all events were halted. I also coach
 companies and organizations. In a couple of the companies, I was the first
 thing to be cut, because they were trying to stop the internal bleeding. I
 felt a lot of anxiety and uncertainty, and then what was happening with COVID
 in the Black community was really, really stressful.


 Q: I know a lot about the last eight or nine months, but over the last few
 years what has really influenced you now in your career? I would love to
 hear about the origins.


 KM:&nbsp;I spent a lot of my adult life
 partnering with my husband. We launched a non-profit organization in our small
 town here in Indiana – after-school programs for some of the most marginalized
 under-represented, under-served kids in our community. We also built a school
 in Zambia, Africa. That work, which I did for eighteen years, was about
 showing up for those who were on the margins of society. Then, I became a
 certified coach and started my coaching practice and public speaking. While I
 was getting certified, I was the Director of Culture for one of the largest
 Verizon Wireless retailers in the nation. After being there for a few years, I
 then started my own practice. So first it was nonprofit, then the corporate
 world, and then I started my own practice coaching individuals.


 In 2019, people started approaching me to speak on diversity and inclusion,
 and my message was, “We can’t have true diversity and equity unless we really
 focus on inclusion.” What does that look like? I have challenged folks not to
 only check a box with the number of Black and Brown people of color working
 for them, not to only invite them to the table, but to give them a seat and
 give them an opportunity to speak and listen to them.


 When I looked at my roster, I remember sharing with my husband and my girls,
 “I feel like I’ve drifted away from my core values.” While I was still
 delivering a message for people on the margins, I was no longer working with
 them. I wasn’t in the neighborhood anymore. I wasn’t with the families
 anymore. And while I was building my practice, it wasn’t really aligning with
 my values.


 So I began sitting with myself and asking: “Wait! How did you get here? This
 is not where you want to be. You need to pivot some things.” I started
 thinking of ways to offer my services and my coaching to Black people, Brown
 people, and then COVID hit and we were quarantined, so I lost all my previous
 clients anyway. I thought, “Okay. I think the universe has done it in a funky
 way, not that it was ordained. All my clients are pretty much gone. So what
 now?” This was an opportunity for me to truly pivot.

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 <img
 
 alt="exhale2"
 class="has-img-center lazyload"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/exhale2_1_a2e3bc8744.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-07T07:31:44.472Z"
 />

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<h5 style="text-align: center">
 When we learn to be centered, 
 it removes stress from the body, 
 so we won’t get as sick physically. 
 There’s a whole science to it.
</h5>

<hr />

<hr class="vertical-space1" />

 To manage my stress, I was reaching for Apps, but it felt like a disconnect. I
 asked myself, “How can I show up in my community? I have time now. My
 clientele has been washed away and I have a clean slate. I’m available! I have
 resources that can help. What can I do?”


 I remember being invited to a Zoom call with a lot of community leaders –
 political leaders, civic leaders, social justice leaders, and artists from the
 rap community. I asked myself, “Katara, what can you do?” over the next few
 days. Then one day I went to meditate without an App in my basement, focusing
 on my breath, and the idea came, “Katara, what if you use the tools and
 resources that you give your clients – advocating for them to prioritize
 emotional well-being – and put them in an App that is easily accessible and
 specific to Women of Color, some of these most marginalized folks in our
 community?” And that includes folks who are gender nonconforming, non-binary,
 LGBTQIA+. What if you create something that will help them manage their
 stress, their anxiety, their trauma, from regular life, and also those
 stresses compounded by systemic racism? So the idea for the App came. I knew
 immediately that I wanted to name it “EXHALE,” because I feel like that’s been
 our cry for 400 years. Because of racism, we can’t breathe.


 My experience is that when we learn to connect back to our breath, we can
 remove stress from our bodies, we can remove anxiety from our bodies. We can’t
 control out there, what’s going to happen when we walk out the front door, but
 we can control our breath. When we learn to be centered, it removes stress
 from the body, so we won’t get as sick physically. There’s a whole science to
 it. I wanted to give my community a resource to exhale and breathe, to find
 our breath, because there’s power in our breath.


 Q: Obviously, wellness is important to you, and that’s what you want to
 give back to your community. It makes me curious to know: What was your
 first experience with meditation? How has it helped you in everyday life,
 and also in dealing with the immensity of everything that’s going on right
 now? What has driven you to help people understand how beneficial meditation
 is in bringing a sense of solace and inner peace?


 KM:&nbsp;It really started in my early
 twenties. I’m 48 now. I was pregnant when I was 19 and had my daughter when I
 was 20. When they put her in my arms, everything, everybody disappeared in
 that moment except for her and me. I was so young, and I remember really
 having a spiritual moment. It was an awakening for me. In that moment I knew I
 had to shift my life. It was a moment where I thought, “Oh man, I’ve got this
 baby. I mean, she’s a newborn, I’m holding her.” You know when they open their
 eyes and they’re cute and you’re just like, “Oh my God, this is a real being!”
 And I remember stroking her nose and her forehead and her little fingers, and
 thinking, “Oh, wow. Somebody is depending on me,” not just for food and
 shelter, but depending on me to be a solid individual, having a sense of who I
 am, being grounded and centered. I didn’t have the language then. I have it
 now. I just remember thinking, “It’s time to make some shifts.”


 My path was the Church. I didn’t grow up in the Church. We went at Christmas
 and Easter, but we weren’t consistent churchgoers. I would say my first real
 encounter with meditation came in the form of what Christians called prayer. I
 remember taking it home with me and sitting in solitude and silence. While the
 Church teaches you to talk a lot, make requests and pray for people, my prayer
 life didn’t always look like that. I made it my own. It was an internal
 journey: Why am I doing the things I do? Why do I think that way? Why am I
 having those thoughts about myself? It was really about being with myself from
 a place of curiosity, a place of wonder, and a place of shifting, adjusting
 and guiding my life in the direction I wanted, and that was empowering for me.
 I would say that’s how it started, and I was very consistent throughout my 20s
 and 30s.


 Since then, in my 40s, I’ve had a deconstruction of faith and it’s morphed and
 evolved and changed into what it is now, although it’s really not that
 different from what I was doing in my early 20s when I started. It’s a way to
 ground and center myself. It’s always been a way for me to journey back home
 to the truest most authentic me. Back then, it was about connecting myself
 with the higher being. Now it’s about, “I am one with all that is.” It helps
 to center and guide and ground me in every present moment, whatever that looks
 like.


 I make a point to meditate every morning. Then, throughout the day if
 something crazy happens, or something unexpected, and I feel anxious, I have a
 resource: I can pause and do breath work, or I can close my eyes and focus on
 my breath. It’s not about focusing on other things, other people, or a higher
 being. It’s about focusing on my breath, and how that centers me. It has
 become a daily practice for me.

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<hr />

<h5 style="text-align: center">
 Now it’s about, “I am one with all that is.” 
 
 It helps to center and guide and ground me 
 in every present moment, 
 whatever that looks like.
</h5>

<hr />

<hr class="vertical-space1" />

 Q: I love that you’ve put it all into an App. There are a dozen and one
 resources that already exist, but I love the focus of EXHALE. Would you
 share some responses you’ve received from the people using it, and the
 direction you’d like to see it go?


 KM:&nbsp;One lady said, “This App has
 changed my life.” She was sexually assaulted earlier this year and was really
 traumatized, and with the pandemic as well she was super anxious. She said, “I
 cannot tell you how much I needed this, but I didn’t know I needed it.” I’ve
 heard that more than anything else. She said, “I look forward to the
 notifications. I feel like you made it just for me!” I am so glad she feels
 that way, because that was my intent. She passed it along to her therapist who
 loves it and has now shared it with a hundred of her clients.


 We keep getting messages like, “I had all of this stuff going on, and I didn’t
 know that I could manage it through breath work and meditation.” With the
 meditation, I talk about the parasympathetic nervous system, so one response
 is, “I really love the science behind this. I love knowing that something is
 actually impacting my body in a positive way.”


 Every time I hear something like that it’s a breath of fresh air, because my
 intent was to truly help people. We want to do Version 2, where we build a
 community for Women of Color to engage with each other, not just with the
 resources in the App. There’s so much value in community.


 I started my own tech company called Katecha, which I’m really excited about.
 I’d love to launch an App for Black and Brown children and students. To build
 community for them is also important. I’m really excited to see what 2021 has
 to offer.


 Q: The practices that you’ve been implementing, for yourself and for
 others, are a great way to remember that life is always going to throw us
 challenges, so we can’t expect, no matter how much we plan. If we’re
 grounded in ourselves and in our breath, if we’re grounded in the energy
 that is our birthright – our mind, body, and soul – then we have everything
 we need within us. Amidst all the chaos in the world, the simplicity that
 you just described is a beautiful concept – to know that we are truly given
 everything that we need in order to feel safe within ourselves.

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<hr />

<h5 style="text-align: center">
 Now it’s about, “I am one with all that is.” 
 
 It helps to center and guide and ground me 
 in every present moment, 
 whatever that looks like.
</h5>

<hr />

<hr class="vertical-space1" />

 KM:&nbsp;Absolutely. It’s a journey home
 to ourselves. Because the world and the way we’re conditioned pulls us out of
 our bodies, so we become disembodied, disconnecting from our soul,
 disconnecting from our emotions, disconnecting from our physical bodies. Black
 women, in particular, have been conditioned to pull away from ourselves, and
 these resources are our journey back home – being in our bodies, being with
 our emotions, being with ourselves, trusting ourselves. I’ve been on this
 journey for many, many years, and I feel more at home than I’ve ever felt in
 my life. It’s my hope that EXHALE is a resource for that journey. As long as
 we are centered here, we’re good. It’s about journeying back home, for sure.

<hr class="vertical-space1" />

 <img
 decoding="async"
 alt="exhale2"
 class="lazyload w-100"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/exhale3_e36a747600.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-07T07:30:29.370Z"
 />

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 Q: That is the fundamental concept of the Heartfulness practices – finding
 our way back to the naturalness that is us. That is one of the goals of
 meditating on the heart. It’s always so beautiful to connect with other
 people who have the same ideals. It’s a lovely reminder that we think we are
 so different and yet we are so similar.


 KM:&nbsp;That is absolutely true.


 Q: Katara, I’m so glad you could speak freely about everything you’ve been
 going through, and the ways you want to keep going. Thank you for educating
 me today and helping me see how much we have in common. I want to use that
 commonality to keep going forward. Thank you.


 KM:&nbsp;Thank you. That is great.


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<hr />

<h4 style="text-align: center">Interviewed by MAMATA VENKAT</h4>

<hr />

Exhale

Kate is a British model, actress, and musician, who has been Miss Great Britain Photogenic, Miss England Intercontinental, and the Face of Aintree 2004. Kate is also a humanitarian and works for various charity projects. Her TEDx talk about her life journey has turned into a viral Internet sensation.

Kate.jpg

Kate Elizabeth Hallam

<h4
 id="h-kate-elizabeth-hallam-is-a-british-model-actress-and-musician-who-has-been-miss-great-britain-photogenic-miss-england-intercontinental-and-the-face-of-aintree-2004-kate-is-also-a-humanitarian-and-works-for-various-charity-projects-her-tedx-talk-about-her-life-journey-has-turned-into-a-viral-internet-sensation-herekate-shares-with-us-what-inspires-her-passion-to-help-people">
 KATE ELIZABETH
 HALLAM
 is a British model, actress, and musician, who has been Miss Great Britain
 Photogenic, Miss England Intercontinental, and the Face of Aintree 2004.
 Kate is also a humanitarian and works for various charity projects. Her TEDx
 talk about her life journey has turned into a viral Internet sensation.
 HereKate shares with us what inspires her passion to help people.
</h4>

<hr class="vertical-space1" />


 I was born and raised in a beautiful town called Buxton, Derbyshire, with
 farmland and beautiful green fields. My brothers and I had a very humble
 upbringing, and our childhood was fun. We would create our own magic, make
 tree dens, and run through the fields. When I was 14, my brother Chris was
 diagnosed with chronic myeloid leukemia. He needed a bone marrow transplant,
 and I was a match for him. So we underwent the transplant, and Professor Huen
 helped us through the process. He is an amazing man who helped cure Chris of
 cancer.



 It was a crazy time, because I was only 14 and scared for my brother, who was
 27. But with things like that, especially with your loved ones, you just get
 on with it and do what you can. Luckily, he was cured. Since then, he’s gone
 on to have a happy family life and a beautiful daughter.



 My brother’s recovery inspired me to raise money for cancer charities, and I
 became an ambassador for the
 <a href="https://www.anthonynolan.org/">Anthony Nolan Bone Marrow Trust</a>.
 We raise awareness for Leukemia sufferers who needed donors. At the time when
 I donated, a bone marrow transplant was a complicated operation. They had to
 drill into the sternum and hips to take the bone marrow. Nowadays, donating
 good bone marrow is just a blood test away. I get people to join the bone
 marrow donor registries to give Leukemia sufferers a better chance of
 survival. That work gives me a lot of joy because it is a personal subject.


<h4>
 Travel to
 India
</h4>


 I have always been a traveler and love exploring new places. I was in Dubai
 when I was asked to shoot a Kannada movie in Bangalore, and jumped at the
 chance because I had never been to India, and I had heard beautiful things. I
 instantly fell in love with India and it carries a very big space in my heart
 to this day. I met my husband there – a lot of you will know him, Lucky Ali. I
 had the most wonderful experiences traveling in India and I can’t wait to go
 back.


<h4>
 Dealing with
 Stress
</h4>


 While pursuing our dreams, we all have days where we feel too stressed or
 overstimulated by external things and situations. Eventually, we realize we’re
 wanting to rush to get to that point of happiness and success, so we try to do
 everything. By the end of the day, we’re puzzled and tired. The key is to
 learn to slow down, and that comes with age.



 We can still achieve while going at a slower pace, realizing the blessings of
 each day: taking moments to breathe; remembering to be present in each moment.
 I have been focusing on that for the last five to six years and it works
 wonderfully. There are still stressful days, we all have them, but we learn to
 manage those days and not be reactive. If something’s meant for you, you are
 going to get there anyway.


<h4>
 Success and
 Joy
</h4>


 Success is an interesting journey. A lot of things in life can make us feel
 less, e.g. getting turned down for a job, and we take them to heart, but the
 key to success is to keep going. There’s a famous saying that “Sometimes you
 give up when you are just about to break through,” throwing away whatever you
 have been working on, however long it’s taken you. It’s good to keep going, to
 keep positive, to be joyful, to breathe, and not always be stressed by getting
 overstimulated.



 People tend to look at other people’s lives and think, “Oh my God! It’s not
 fair. Why isn’t my life like that?” Instead, just enjoy your life. It is
 magnificent, and it’s you who is going to make it better.


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<div>
 <figure>
 <img decoding="async" width="700" height="466" alt="" class="mx-auto d-block lazyload has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/in_pursuit_of_happiness2_700x466_2298065b03.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-13T10:02:38.878Z" />
 </figure>
</div>

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 It’s important for me to know that I am giving back to people. It could be
 raising awareness for Leukemia sufferers, or simply putting a smile on
 someone’s face. You never know what other people are going through, and a
 simple smile can give so much to somebody. I try to work everyday in a state
 of giving rather than taking. It’s much better to give, and to give joy and
 happiness to other people.



 I think fitness is the key to joy. Your body is your temple. Take a little
 time out each day for your body – whether you are meditating or going to the
 gym. It’s that workout that brings you joy and good vibes. My three boys keep
 me very busy, but I still go to the gym.


<hr class="vertical-space1" />

<hr />

<h4 class="has-text-align-center">
 Your body is your temple.
 Take a little time out each day for your
 body – whether you are meditating or going to the gym. It’s that
 workout that brings you joy and good vibes.
</h4>

<hr />

<hr class="vertical-space1" />


 I take time out and there is no excuse for not doing that. Everybody’s got
 time to do something for themselves: whether it’s mental meditation or
 physical exercise. Exercising can help release endorphins, which keep us
 positive and lets us strive for success.



 Managing
 Relationships



 I have been married twice and my second marriage is to David. He is a
 well-known music producer, we have 2 boys together, and I have Dani from my
 ex-husband Lucky Ali. Life is good. Everybody is happy. Everybody is peaceful
 and we all get on well.



 I think that is the key – when you have children, it’s important to make
 relationships work. After what I went through with my brother, when you
 overcome adversity at a young age, you realize that life is short and
 transient. It puts things into perspective. I realized that you have to
 treasure everything.



 Not everything is going to work out for you in life, but it doesn’t mean you
 have to destroy it, or argue about it. You can walk away from things that are
 not meant for you, or that may have run their course. You can end a
 relationship and continue with a friendship. That’s what I have with Lucky,
 and it’s been especially important for Dani, our 10-year-oldson. If you work
 on the relationship, in the long run it works better for everybody.



 Just keep things positive and breathe. Take a breath before you react to
 things. I hope everybody out there manages that.



 Managing Kids,
 Hobbies, and Personal Care



 I get up early – that is the key. It is challenging with three boys. I love
 getting into nature and I take time to go into the woods. Trees calm me down
 from the energy of the day. Taking little hikes helps me survive the day, and
 the busy-ness with the boys, as I don’t have any help. We make it work as a
 family, we are a team, and it’s good to remember that. I take time out for my
 boys, and for my hobbies, while I nurture my career.



 I also take time out for myself. Meditating and going to the gym set me up for
 the whole day: fitness and a positive mind. When it gets tough, just remember
 that our parents did it for us, and we are doing it for our children; it’s the
 way it happens. Look at the joy we get from our children. We do a lot of
 running around for them, but they are going to grow up into love itself.


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 <figure>
 <img decoding="async" width="700" height="466" alt="" class="mx-auto d-block lazyload has-img-center"
 src="https://cdn-prod-static.heartfulness.org/in_pursuit_of_happiness3_700x466_31ee1f53dc.jpg?updated_at=2023-04-13T10:04:09.016Z" />
 </figure>
</div>

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