KATHLEEN SCARBORO tells her own personal story about being the best grandma she can be.
Becoming a grandmother revolutionized my existence. It was a chance to be the loving parent I wish I had been when my son was young. When my son was little, I knew I wasn’t as mentally available for him as I should have been. I lacked patience and was worried about too many other things like money, constantly looking for work – all the pressures of daily life. I was an anxious, guilt-ridden young mother.
Coming to a spiritual path and slowly divesting myself of my mental burdens made life become more and more palatable. Gradually life seemed to be less of a battle. I came to realize that I had made things unnecessarily complicated for myself. I was on a slow but sure path towards inner balance.
It took about 20 years of spiritual practice to completely change my mental attitude and feel grateful for the joy each day could bring.
So when Alice came along in 2012, I was given the opportunity to be the best grandma I could. Even during the first week of her existence I was the one who could get her to sleep. She was one of those babies who would fiercely fight to stay awake, so I would empty my mind and walk and dance with her until she slid into sleep.
If we devote ourselves to the
children,
the world will move in the right direction.
For Alice, I know my presence is totally reassuring. Even when she was only one and her parents left her alone with me for a couple of weeks, we had a great time. She did not cry once.
Why are meditators reassuring? I think it is because they have made peace with death. We can only reassure others if we are at peace with ourselves and feel safe. And we can only really feel safe if we are not afraid of leaving this world at any moment. We also feel safe and confident because we have taken responsibility for our lives and believe things happen to us for good reasons and for our benefit. So we don’t think that we are in danger and our children profit from our attitude. We show them that they can be bold because life is not threatening.
Alice will have to face many difficulties, as all of us do, but I think the unconditional love and solidarity of her parents and grandparents will give her the confidence to always feel like she can cope with whatever life brings her way. She knows we all think the world of her and feel blessed to be her family. All we want from her is for her to be totally herself.
Wouldn’t it be a different world if all children who came here were surrounded with helpful, caring, devoted, happy adults? Diogenes said, “The foundation of every state is the education of its youth.” If we devote ourselves to the children, the world will move in the right direction.
Art and article by KATHLEEN SCARBORO
Kathleen Scarboro
When Kathleen received her first commission for a mural painting from The Public Art Workshop of Chicago, it was the beginning of a lifelong career in art. Her series of Reunion Island paintings were exhibited over a nine-month period in... Read More
